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Preschool was mostly for ME, and to help my kids become comfortable outside of my care and in a structured environment with other children. As a SAHM who never used a babysitter (thanks mom) it was better to ease them in by going a few hours a day, a couple days a week. And I liked my alone time. The 5 days a week routine didn't happen until kindergarten though.
That's why I did it too
Our son went two days a week for a few hours in the morning. It was at the same facility he would then do a little gymnastics class at. I would come watch the gymnastics class, which was a good way for me to meet other moms.
Our son did love it. He still remembers those teachers names for some reason. He was an only child, so it was nice for him to be away from me for a bit. I think we did it for two years, when he was 4 and 5 (he has a late b'day so started kindergarten at almost 6).
I certainly didn't do it because I was wanting him to get a jump on school or anything. He would have been fine going straight into kindergarten from that aspect.
Preschool is important for children who otherwise would be sitting in front of the television most of the day, for those whose parents must be at work, and for those whose parents need to be away from them for a while.
Preschool is not important for a child whose mother is taking her places, teaching her things, enrolling her in classes, reading with her, and enjoying the time with her.
Yes, school will be an adjustment, and a 5-year-old in school for the first time may feel somewhat overwhelmed - for a couple hours, or off-and-on for a few days.
I have 4 children and my experience varies widely with each of them.
My first daughter loved to experience anything and had been in a child care/preschool setting since she was 7 weeks old while I worked. No issues socially academically or anywhere else going to K.
My second daughter was clingy and less likely to adjust easily to changes. She also had been in child care/preschool beginning since she was 6 weeks old. I started working in the child care center when she was 3. Didn't matter one tiny bit. She still clung to me and cried every single day for 6 weeks straight when she began K.
My third daughter was also in child care at 6 weeks, however I left the center when she was 3 and began home child care when she was 4. She was eager to learn and explore and albeit a bit shy, never had much issue socially. Starting K was exciting for her and she was way ahead of the other kids academically, without benefit of a preschool setting.
My fourth, my only son, was home with me and never in a child care/preschool setting. His personality is outgoing and very self motivated to learn anything and everything he could imagine. He began K academically at about a 3rd grade level, instant social butterfly and leader within the class. He hasn't looked back since.
I'm also an Early Childhood Education professional and my professional opinion is that preschool is NOT essential.
An attentive, supportive and willing parent can offer everything a child needs to set the foundation for a successful educational career in many cases.
There are some children who don't attend child care nor preschool before beginning Kindergarten that have a really rough start, however that is not exclusive to just those children with that background. It has more to do with their individual personality and ability to handle changes and transitions than having prior experience.
If socializing in groups of other children may be a concern, then add things to your routine that have some structure and rules and occur routinely like the local story time at your library or book store, dance class, recreational center classes or music lessons.
If you worry about her separating from you then you can use things like a Mother's Day Out program, drop in care at the gym, Sunday school or vacation bible school classes for kids where you leave her and come back to get her later.
Anything academic can be taught by you as a part of your everyday life exploring and experiencing as long as she doesn't have learning disabilities that need specialized teaching.
I think it is important to have at least a year of preschool. The norm around here is to start them when they're 3 and send them for 2 years. Mine started when they were 4. It is normally only 2 or 3 half days/week so there is still time to do all the fun things you are doing around your new city. you can get the not-so-fun stuff like grocery shopping done while s/he is at preschool.
A parent can teach a child the academics and provide social setting with other kids, BUT it's very hard to teach the structure of a classroom setting and getting a child used to a different authority figure (i.e. the teacher instead of the parent) unless one is in a classroom setting. There are a lot of nuances in a classroom that most homes don't replicate (using a cubby to place belongings, taking turns speaking/raising one's hand, standing in line while the teacher does a head count after play ground, what to do during a fire drill, etc.). Yes, these things are learned rather quickly, but I think a lot of kids would awkward at first if they are not used to them (added to the stress of mommy leaving them there with strangers). For that reason, I think most children would benefit from 2-3 days a week in a classroom setting starting at least several months before kindergarten.
I still clearly remember my first day of kindergarten (37 years ago)- and not in a good way. It was the most horrible moment of my life at the time. (I was ahead academically, been to a lot of places, and had lots of friends to play with, but had never been to a preschool)
Those are all very interesting points of view. It certainly helps to have other people's ideas into the mix, as I need to figure out the wisest use of our available resources. I was definitely concerned about her being prepared for kindergarten and using preschool as a stepping stone to get her accustomed to a structured environment away from home.
Although that brings up another point - I didn't go to school in the US so could somebody clue me in as to what kindergarten is about (a bit off topic, I know). Where I grew up we went to kindergarten at 4 and started first grade at 5, and there wasn't any preschool at all. I think kindergarten there is kind of like what preschool is here, it gets you prepared for school. Does the child attend kindergarten at the elementary school they will be starting at? I'm guessing it all depends on your school district and such but I'm not sure how it all works.
I know it tends to be the thing to do now, but my son did not attend preschool at all. I was a SAHM at the time. He didn't seems to suffer for it in any way, either academically or socially. I'm not saying anything against it. Just I don't think it's the mandatory experience some would make it these days. Like hypocore said, probably much depends on the child. My son was outgoing and sociable. He also was being taken to nursery at church so he did get some "group experience" that way.
Here in Texas kindergarten is generally at the public school in your district. Some are half-day and some are all day.
I'm also an Early Childhood Education professional and my professional opinion is that preschool is NOT essential.
An attentive, supportive and willing parent can offer everything a child needs to set the foundation for a successful educational career in many cases.
There are some children who don't attend child care nor preschool before beginning Kindergarten that have a really rough start, however that is not exclusive to just those children with that background. It has more to do with their individual personality and ability to handle changes and transitions than having prior experience.
I'm a kindergarten teacher (and former preschool teacher) and I think this hits the nail on the head.
I can almost always see the difference between kids who had preschool and kids who didn't when they enter my classroom. I'm not talking about academic difference. But generally speaking there are other factors that are tied to the no-preschool thing that make it difficult to tell what caused what.
If the child didn't go to preschool because he had a holy fit every time mom tried to leave him there, it's hard to tell whether 1) the child has a temperament very resistant to change, transitions, being with others outside the family (and so would likely behave similarly even if he had gone to pre-K), or 2) the child sets all the rules for the household (in which case a structured K setting will be a difficult transition).
If he didn't go to preschool because the parents are fairly uninterested in doing anything that isn't mandatory, then again, K is likely not going to be a huge success whether or not pre-K happened.
It doesn't sound to me like the OP's situation is any of these things. I would expect that an involved parent with a child who accepts some structure, exposes the child to a wide variety of experiences, and even enrolls the child in activities that are "school like" is going to have a child who is going to do just fine in my class.
In my community pretty much everyone with parents like the OP does also go to preschool, so the ones who don't fall into one of those other three categories and they do usually have issues. I don't think it's so much no preschool though, it's what led to the decision to not do preschool.
Ugg Eresh, that's the very scenario I would like to avoid. I'm thinking of sending her next year when she's 4 - does anybody really think 2 years of preschool is necessary? She's going to go to school for the rest of her childhood life - as long as she gets an idea of school structure before she hits kindergarten that should be enough, no?
I have no qualms about her going - I would definitely send her and continue to do outings if we could afford it, but we're looking at 4 to 6 hundred bucks a month - which is going to limit our options as far as going to museums and other things that also cost money. I'm going to look into Mom's Day out as per no kudzu's suggestion, I've never heard of that until now.
BTW, I very much appreciate everybody's very thoughtful and well-reasoned replies, it's extremely helpful.
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