I need options son expelled!!! (deviant, punishment, teenager, pills)
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CD PLEASE help my 8th grade son was expelled for inappropriately touching 2 grls @ school, I don't know what my options are. This is the 1st time I've had problems with his behavior, to my disbelief it has been revealed that this is a game that the 7th & 8th grade students decided to enagage in @ the start of the school yr Called "Smack A** Friday" They offered an alternate school....which is not an option for me. Wrong is wrong on his part this I know but I don't want him expsed to that environment nor does it "fix/focus" on the problem at hand.....all comments good/bad/-/+ & or suggestions is greatly appreciated TY CD
Now this sounds like a good time. Brought a smile to my face, I'll tell you.
Sorry, I realize that this is a serious situation and I don't mean to make light of it. But for crying out loud -- Smack A** Friday.
Quote:
Originally Posted by coco29
They offered an alternate school....which is not an option for me. Wrong is wrong on his part this I know but I don't want him expsed to that environment nor does it "fix/focus" on the problem at hand...
What is the environment like at an alternate school?
CD PLEASE help my 8th grade son was expelled for inappropriately touching 2 grls @ school, I don't know what my options are. This is the 1st time I've had problems with his behavior, to my disbelief it has been revealed that this is a game that the 7th & 8th grade students decided to enagage in @ the start of the school yr Called "Smack A** Friday" They offered an alternate school....which is not an option for me. Wrong is wrong on his part this I know but I don't want him expsed to that environment nor does it "fix/focus" on the problem at hand.....all comments good/bad/-/+ & or suggestions is greatly appreciated TY CD
Okay, here's the thing...you reject the idea of the alternative school placement because you "don't want him exposed to that environment", but he IS the kind of kid in that environment, don't you see?
He needs to have the boom lowered on him hard right now before it's too late to correct his attitudes and deviant behavior.
You need to make him understand that this alternative school is the consequence HE has to pay for engaging in inappropriate behavior.
If you fail to lay down the law and make him live with the consequences of his actions now while you still can, he will likely continue down a path that will lead to bigger issues later down the line.
I know this is distressing to have to deal with, but he needs a huge wake up call and education about how he is to treat other people, especially women.
I'm guessing his dad is not in the picture? All the more reason to get his behavior reined in RIGHT NOW by letting the school environment help you to help him.
Best of luck to you, I know this is hard for you, but with some hard lessons learned he could probably be back in a regular school by next fall.
No it goes further 1 parent was concerned and the other 1 was witnessed by staff....I wish it was just the butt....he plays a lot & said he was playn by puttn 1 grl in the headlock and makn her apologize for hitting him but I've been told he pushed her up against the wall & touched her....he admitted that both times were the butt & they were playn with the other incident....the alternate school can't even control the students there...ie bullies, selln pills @ school, fighters....my son will be ate alive, he is almost an A student never been suspended EVER, & is well liked by his teachers IDK What 2 do
IF THIS WOULD HAVE HAPPENED WITH MY GIRLS I JUST WOULD HAVE CALLED THE PARENTS MYSELF...or if it happened 2 me @ that age I would have (did) pull hiss pants fown & smacked him
I'm going to try to reserve my judgement and offer some options I can think of: you can try the alternative school for the rest of the year and move back to high school in the 9th grade (not really that bad of an idea if you're being faced with NO school). Unfortunately when I was growing up here alternative school was generally for kids who were considered criminals (drugs, weapons, repeated fighting) so I CAN see how you'd want to avoid that if possible. It has the potential to make his behavior worse.
If I could figure out a way, I guess I'd home school the basics and part of his homeschooling would require a LOT of volunteer and community service work. You could also maybe look at private school if you can find someone to take him or maybe move to another county? There is also online schooling if you manage to do that at home as well.
Sorry you are dealing with this. Parenting a teenager can really be hard.
No it goes further 1 parent was concerned and the other 1 was witnessed by staff....I wish it was just the butt....he plays a lot & said he was playn by puttn 1 grl in the headlock and makn her apologize for hitting him but I've been told he pushed her up against the wall & touched her....he admitted that both times were the butt & they were playn with the other incident....the alternate school can't even control the students there...ie bullies, selln pills @ school, fighters....my son will be ate alive, he is almost an A student never been suspended EVER, & is well liked by his teachers IDK What 2 do
IF THIS WOULD HAVE HAPPENED WITH MY GIRLS I JUST WOULD HAVE CALLED THE PARENTS MYSELF...or if it happened 2 me @ that age I would have (did) pull hiss pants fown & smacked him
Great, so in addition to inappropriate touching, he's physically aggressive
Mom, you have a real problem on your hands whether you want to believe it or not.
TOUGH LOVE - practice it now or watch him suffer from lack of it all the rest of his life.
And btw, tough love doesn't mean physical punishment - he's WAY too old to be "taking down his pants and smacked". PLEASE DON'T DO THAT.
You sound like you are in over your head and this boy needs a strong male role model or mentor, not just a mom to help him.
Is there some strong male family member you can bring on board to help you with this? If not, consider talking to your minister to see if they can suggest one of the men in your church who can mentor him.
In addition, please get a referral to a therapist who specializes in working with young males.
No it goes further 1 parent was concerned and the other 1 was witnessed by staff....I wish it was just the butt....he plays a lot & said he was playn by puttn 1 grl in the headlock and makn her apologize for hitting him but I've been told he pushed her up against the wall & touched her....he admitted that both times were the butt & they were playn with the other incident....
That is a much different scenario then you implied in your OP.
"Playing" by putting a girl in a headlock? Then touching her?
By eighth grade most boys KNOW this is inappropriate behavior.
I think there is more history than you have stated.
Sound like he needs a " Smack A** Friday". If the offense is more than just playfully kidding around. Suggest getting him a little one on one with a head doc. See if there is more to this. If not, work on getting him back into a regular school or look into private school. Military would be good. If you put him in a state alternative school. Just take him downtown. Because it will not take him long to get there on his own.
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