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They are in the horrible examples that the OP brings forth as being ladylike not to mention her complete disregard for young men.
Bkees your heart, as I said...manners and knowing social niceties are a tool....they should never be the goal.
Are you trying to bless my heart?? Don't even go there.
She did not say manners are the goal. You came to this thread not even attempting to understand the OP's question but jerking your knee for an argument.
"Disregard for young men?" LOL Would you feel better if she had asked if people are raising their daughters to be gentlemen?
Daughters can be raised to be ladies and sons can be raised to be gentlemen, and they ALL can be raised to be self-sufficient, kind, assertive, caring people. Settle down.
Are parents still teaching their daughters to be ladies? While I believe women achieving everything they may desire in their hearts, there is a certain way to carry yourself. Is that a lost art?
Things my mother taught me:
*A professional/educated women should never have to announce her background or achievement -it should be apparent by the way you dress and how you carry yourself.
*Don't be loud. Everyone in your vicinity should not clearly hear your conversation.
*The man that is a professional is looking for a woman that matches his presentation and appearance.
As a mother/father - do you teach your children to act like ladies?
Are there still parents who are raising their sons to be jerks who are "looking for a woman that maches his presentation and appearance?" Are there still parents who are teaching their sons that women shouldn't be "loud" or heard? Are there still parents who are raising their sons to be so close-minded to think that women have to dress a certain way to be considered their equal?
As a woman and mother of 2 girls, I find his post to be disgustingly offensive.
Are you trying to bless my heart?? Don't even go there.
She did not say manners are the goal. You came to this thread not even attempting to understand the OP's question but jerking your knee for an argument.
"Disregard for young men?" LOL Would you feel better if she had asked if people are raising their daughters to be gentlemen?
Daughters can be raised to be ladies and sons can be raised to be gentlemen, and they ALL can be raised to be self-sufficient, kind, assertive, caring people. Settle down.
Agreed but in all fairness, that is not what the OP said. Even when she came back to clarify, she specifically only mentioned how girls should be raised.
She easily could have posted asking whether parents were raising their children with manners. Or even whether parents we're raising young ladies and gentlemen. She did not.
Are parents still teaching their daughters to be ladies? While I believe women achieving everything they may desire in their hearts, there is a certain way to carry yourself. Is that a lost art?
Things my mother taught me:
*A professional/educated women should never have to announce her background or achievement -it should be apparent by the way you dress and how you carry yourself.
*Don't be loud. Everyone in your vicinity should not clearly hear your conversation.
*The man that is a professional is looking for a woman that matches his presentation and appearance.
As a mother/father - do you teach your children to act like ladies?
I don't have kids yet, but if I have a girl, yes we will. And if I have a boy, we will raise him to be a gentleman, because all of those rules apply to men too.
The kind of etiquette you speak of applies to both sexes. Loud-talkers are rude. Why make the rule only apply to females?
People are ruder than they used to be.
I like to think people should raise their kids, male and female, to act respectfully. And even if you don't 'fit in' with the crowd, be yourself. If the 'in thing' is a usual teenage uniform, its okay and fine not to join in. Not being part of the 'in thing' doesn't make you lesser, just someone who knows themself more.
My mother taught me and her sister my cousin to be respectful. Tempers run in the family, and no way were we going to be meek. The boys were also taught to be respectful. We were not taught to be meek.
But grandma's mom was a single mother most of her life. Both husbands died young with young children. She ran an actor's hotel in her later life. She certainly didn't teach her daughters to be meek but in her business, politeness and general tolerance of people were necessary.
I think there must be some other component at work too, since Mom was one of those women who usually got her way but never approached it directly. She'd say nothing over starting a fight. When she did say something absolute, you could be sure she meant it. Her sister was much more expressive, and very independent.
Mom and I had fireworks since I'm Dad, who was stubborn about anything you pushed him on. But I did learn how sometimes saying little is better, and going ahead and making your plans.
I think part of our personalities is written in the gameplan we inherit and if parents think it can be replaced they only drive it under.
Right now we are in a time when women are finally speaking up and insisting on being heard. Men are sometimes not doing well about it, and a generation of young men are already seeing the change as normal. The people who don't like it want to push it back but its too late. Many people see the 'old rules' as something sexist and restrictive, and many were. We'll work out a new set of rules in time, but bringing back the old isn't going to work. We need to teach basic respect for others as just that and a cornerstone of a functional society.
Absolutely. My brothers went to dancing school and have beautiful manners. I got a thank you note from one of them the other day. There is no sexism involved, they went through the exact same thing my sister and I did.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life
They aren't mutually exclusive.
Thank you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life
Are you trying to bless my heart?? Don't even go there.
.
I agree. That is a really rude thing to say. Every southerner knows "Bless Your Heart" means Go F%^$ Yourself.
a lady should be seen and not heard, and make sure the man is well-fed and taken care of in the bedroom (and sometimes on the kitchen table). follow these rules and you will have a happy household. simple enough.
Thanks for the comments everyone. Just to clarify, I believe in women accomplishing anything they set their mind to achieve. The few examples I gave are not the totality of what you teach a child. It goes without saying that the basics of parenting include raising your boys and girls to be decent members of society. Not only educated women can carry themselves with class.
I posted this post to address specifically ladies or young women. I'm NOT preaching the practices of:Ladies home journal 1955 guide to being a good wife. I'm not.
Perhaps a better way to pose the question: Are you teaching ladies the basics of etiquette?
Whew, this world is touchy. I asked specifically about ladies because I've been appalled by witnessing women talking loud enough for 1/2 the room to hear their conversation (no-this was not at sports bar either) or sitting with their legs wide open in dresses and it made me wonder What the Deuce is going on here? I've witnessed ladies speak with daggers. Yes, that's the only way to describe it. It's a harsh, overly aggressive mean way to deliver information when communicating and it made me wonder is there a new playbook that has evolved over the decades.
Being a lady doesn't mean you speak softly, fade into the background, and mimic your significant other's opinion about everything. I believe in girl power to the fullest, stating your opinion and not remaining silent. When you consider women like Hilary Clinton, Michelle Obama, Nancy Pelosi, Janet Yellen. In the entertainment industry: Beyonce. Beyonce gives a great performance, bold sexy and spectacular. In the world of tennis: Serena Williams, Venus Williams. Serena Williams will eliminate her competition and then you hear her speak like a lady. It's not meek and ladylike vs. powerful. A powerful person is a person who speaks once and their voice/instructions carry weight with it that makes others respond.
I'm bringing these names to your attention because they are passionate, powerful women. They can still climb to the top, reach achievement, and still have their femininity. Maybe the question I asked is being lost in the gender war but it was my question.
Yes, all women can carry themselves in a way that reflects their value regardless of station, w/or without education-irrelevant.
God bless everyone and thank you for your opinion.
There's absolutely nothing ladylike about Beyonce's live concerts.
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