I'm losing my mind. Could my step-kids be having SEX behind our backs? (step-siblings, child care)
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I don’t really know how to start this off. You be the judge on am I blowing this out of proportion or no.
But I’m almost certain that my Biological son 16 and steo daughter 17 are sleeping together and by that I mean they’re <edit>having sex
This will be a sort of a vent, but I will show you the evidence and you help me to decide on what should I do next. I think that I’m going crazy this makes me so ANGRY!
It provided some really great tips that I haven't seen anywhere before, not only in that article but others as well. But even though I got my emotions under control I still don't know how to sort this situation out.
I don’t have any solid evidence that they are actually having sex, but it has been super weird and all of my red flags have gone off for the past few months.
It all started few months ago, I started to notice that they are spending more time together, but it was nothing big, Step Daughter helped out my son to do his homework and they watched movies together. I thought that this is really nice! They’re finally bonding after a year of living together.
But then it started to get weird. They spent a LOT of time together. I noticed that my son very often in my step daughters room and they always close the door, so I have no idea what is going on in there. I don’t really want to break the trust of my kids and don’t storm in the room, I always knock.
But last night I woke up very early because I needed the toilet, it was about half an hour before everyone in our house wakes up and I heard my son coming out of my step daughters room. My heart was pounding and I had no idea what the hell had just happened. But do you think this is normal?
I haven’t talked to my Husband about this, how could I? I don’t have any solid evidence and I can’t possibly ask the kids, because what if I’m wrong? I really don’t know what to do can you give me any tips or ideas?
Last edited by Miss Blue; 02-17-2017 at 06:00 PM..
Talk to your husband and your kids. I think an open honest relationship is the way to go here. If you can get more evidence in the meantime that would help. Hide a nanny cam in their rooms?
I don’t really know how to start this off. You be the judge on am I blowing this out of proportion or no.
But I’m almost certain that my Biological son 16 and steo daughter 17 are sleeping together and by that I mean they’re ****ING!
This will be a sort of a vent, but I will show you the evidence and you help me to decide on what should I do next. I think that I’m going crazy this makes me so ANGRY!
It provided some really great tips that I haven't seen anywhere before, not only in that article but others as well. But even though I got my emotions under control I still don't know how to sort this situation out.
I don’t have any solid evidence that they are actually having sex, but it has been super weird and all of my red flags have gone off for the past few months.
It all started few months ago, I started to notice that they are spending more time together, but it was nothing big, Step Daughter helped out my son to do his homework and they watched movies together. I thought that this is really nice! They’re finally bonding after a year of living together.
But then it started to get weird. They spent a LOT of time together. I noticed that my son very often in my step daughters room and they always close the door, so I have no idea what is going on in there. I don’t really want to break the trust of my kids and don’t storm in the room, I always knock.
But last night I woke up very early because I needed the toilet, it was about half an hour before everyone in our house wakes up and I heard my son coming out of my step daughters room. My heart was pounding and I had no idea what the hell had just happened. But do you think this is normal?
I haven’t talked to my Husband about this, how could I? I don’t have any solid evidence and I can’t possibly ask the kids, because what if I’m wrong? I really don’t know what to do can you give me any tips or ideas?
So you do not want to be a parent? Perhaps this hands off trusting approach is what got you here in the first place.
Advice...grow a pair, stop worrying about being there friends and be a parent, there is a good chance your kids are banging, and if not, something almost as bad, example..drugs...How could you talk to your husband?....are you kidding me, he is your your husband and the father to one and the step-father to the other...this has to be a joke, nobody is this spineless and weak willed.
OP, what upsets you most? That teenagers are (possibly) having sex in your home? Or that they are step-siblings?
I feel like when you have two teenagers not biologically related and recently started spending a lot of time together, that it shouldn't come as a surprise that feelings may develop. Since they are not biologically related nor even view one another as brother/sister (it's not as if they grew up together from early childhood), I wouldn't make them feel like their relationship is incestuous.
You can forbid them from having sex, but I wouldn't be surprised if they continued doing it. Even if you remove the doors to their rooms, they will sometimes be alone in the house. They are teenagers with raging hormones, after all.
It's going to get complicated because you all live in the same house as a family. It's going to be difficult to make them stay apart. You and your husband need to set them down and have a mature, rational,honest discussion with them.
I don’t really know how to start this off. You be the judge on am I blowing this out of proportion or no.
But I’m almost certain that my Biological son 16 and steo daughter 17 are sleeping together and by that I mean they’re <edit>delete
This will be a sort of a vent, but I will show you the evidence and you help me to decide on what should I do next. I think that I’m going crazy this makes me so ANGRY!
It provided some really great tips that I haven't seen anywhere before, not only in that article but others as well. But even though I got my emotions under control I still don't know how to sort this situation out.
I don’t have any solid evidence that they are actually having sex, but it has been super weird and all of my red flags have gone off for the past few months.
It all started few months ago, I started to notice that they are spending more time together, but it was nothing big, Step Daughter helped out my son to do his homework and they watched movies together. I thought that this is really nice! They’re finally bonding after a year of living together.
But then it started to get weird. They spent a LOT of time together. I noticed that my son very often in my step daughters room and they always close the door, so I have no idea what is going on in there. I don’t really want to break the trust of my kids and don’t storm in the room, I always knock.
But last night I woke up very early because I needed the toilet, it was about half an hour before everyone in our house wakes up and I heard my son coming out of my step daughters room. My heart was pounding and I had no idea what the hell had just happened. But do you think this is normal?
I haven’t talked to my Husband about this, how could I? I don’t have any solid evidence and I can’t possibly ask the kids, because what if I’m wrong? I really don’t know what to do can you give me any tips or ideas?
WHY can't you ask them? Has communication in your household broken down? If you barge/spy on them, you are not addressing the real issue.
And absolutely tell them if you can't/ won't afford to be grandparents. Let them know how much child care costs and the consequences of not finishing school.
Barging/spying will only lead to further breakdowns in trust levels and lead to concealment and secrets. If you want to help your kids make wise decisions, they have to actually listen to you...
Last edited by Miss Blue; 02-17-2017 at 06:04 PM..
You and your husband are both parents. Act like parents. Discuss your concerns with him and see what his suggestions are. Personally, after discussing it with my husband I would ask my son what if anything is going on and ask my husband to ask his child. You can usually tell if kids are being truthful or not. Just have a plan B if you don't get the answer you're hoping for.
I always thought Mike Brady designing a house which included a shared bathroom between 3 boys and 3 girls who were not blood related would result in something out of Caligula.
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