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Leave the 'shortcomings' to the spouse or boss.
Friends and loving family will support the person's attributes.
As a mom it was my sons who openly conveyed their drawbacks. Sometimes I agreed and other times I figured I was less in tune to them (particularly the teen years).
Not a fan of assuming either parent is more fair minded in accessments.
Accentuate the positive works for most adults and kids too.
A guy is really not much of a catch at all-not good looking, or successful, smart, or even very interesting...yet their Mom always seems to think they are the most handsome guy around...
Why do Mom's overestimate their sons desirability? Father's seem a bit more realistic IMHO.
The son probably resembles the man the mother fell in love with and had children with.
I don't think all moms think their sons are gods gift. However it would be better for a mom to think that her son is gods gift over not caring about him or thinking he's a loser. I think we all get irritated with the moms who brag about their sons and the son is actually all that she says he is. I've encountered many situations in life I guess. I think my 6 year old son is pretty awesome, I hope he continues to be awesome but I am pretty introverted and know that even if he is I won't be saying too much about it. If someone is really awesome mom doesn't need to let everyone know.
As a woman (mother), I put in more effort. My child (daughter) was in my body. Mothers have less options to walk away. Almost no chance to do so unscathed. To admit our children aren't suitable on someway is the ultimate insult. It our fault in our genes, our selection of partner, or how we raised our child.
No..that is just harsh and cruel coming from anyone let alone a person's Mother.
I have just noticed Fathers seem a bit more blunt. They don't seem to sugarcoat....Anyone agree with this?
Yes, I agree with this.
This is why 2 parent families are so important. You need both kinds of love to have balance in life. Mothers tend to love unconditionally. That sounds good, but it often ends up creating a generation of adults who are stuck in adolescence. Fathers tend to be kinda blunt. That might not sound as good to many people (and too much of it isn't), but it helps people realize they have to put effort into things (relationships, work, etc.) if they want to make their way in the world and have good lives.
I don't think that my husband overestimates our son's or our daughter's desirability more or less than I do. We both recognize they have flaws, but we both think they are amazing adults. My daughter's husband is a lucky man. My son's serious girlfriend is a lucky woman.
Maybe I am different than most people. I was far more likely to mention things to them that they could improve when they lived at home. Our relationship has evolved now that they are both independent adults. I care most about seeing them and enjoying our limited time together. There's no room or time to point out their flaws unless they ask. Maybe it's because my own mother never has had a problem pointing out my flaws even though I've been an adult for a long, long time.
“Delusions are often functional. A mother's opinions about her children's beauty, intelligence, goodness, et cetera ad nauseam, keep her from drowning them at birth.”
― Robert Heinlein, Time Enough for Love
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