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I was infrequently spanked as a kid but it was for pretty big things. I basically took a crayon and colored every stone on the porch (this was back in the 60s where people had those stone porches), all our screens in the front window, etc. It caused damage to the house. My father gave me a paddling and I never did something like that again. My mother, who I was torturing being a really horrid teen, slapped me in the car once for mouthing off. The poor woman had just undergone a major surgery and I was being a terror. I never forgot that slap and immediately shut up. For the most part, my parents talked everything out with me. But I do remember those few spankings....not beatings as people love to point out.....but firm discipline. I loved and deeply respected my parents. As I got older, they were more creative in their punishments. When I shot a hole through our above ground pool with a bow and arrow, guess who was in there in cold water patching that leak? Or when I caused some other mischief causing damage, guess who paid for it out of their allowance or repaired it. Far worse than a spanking.
Have I spanked my kids. Yes but rarely......maybe a handful of times over 11 years and a swat on the behind or hand. One was for trashing and I mean trashing our bathroom which caused damage to the house. This was after plenty of warnings. I haven't spanked my kids in years because there are other forums of discipline we use. Spanking at this point...nah not effective.
My husband was beaten as a kid...with a belt, cane or thrown across the room. He was deathly afraid of his father. There is a BIG difference between a swat on the hand or butt and a beating. He was beaten to the point of being bruised or having his arm broken. He always knew that his father could kill him if he really crossed the line with something. That my dear City Data Forum users is abuse.
OMG you've got to be kidding. Do you think a young child actually knows the difference? Pain is pain and humiliation is humiliation no matter what the beater is telling the kid.
if you tell them then yes they know the difference.
Scenario:
Parent to child: "Dont touch this or youll get a spanking". Few minutes later child is found playing with item.
Parent: "What did I just say to you?"
Child: "That if I touched it id get a spanking"
Parent: "And what did you do after i told you not to touch it?"
Child: "I went and touched it"
Parent: "And now what do you think that means?"
Child: "It means im going to get a spanking"
Parent: "Yes it does and youve got nobody to blame but yourself. Maybe next time youll think twice before doing something you were told not to. Now bend over."
I was spanked. I dont do drugs, i dont lie, i dont cheat, i dont steal, i dont back talk, i dont disrespect my elders, i obey the law and i contribute all that to my being spanked.
Any time that I did wrong and was not spanked the only thing that went through my mind was "I got away with it"
I was spanked. I dont do drugs, i dont lie, i dont cheat, i dont steal, i dont back talk, i dont disrespect my elders, i obey the law and i contribute all that to my being spanked.
My daughter wasn't hit...and she doesn't do any of those things either. I contribute it to her not being hit and being taught respect and responsibility.
So, what you are saying is that if you weren't beating into submission, you'd have no problem doing drugs, cheating, lying and stealing because you weren't taught they were wrong, you just don't want to get hit?
Scarlet, whoever said anything about being beaten into submission? Youre completely twisting words to suit your own ends. Giving a kid a few whacks on the rump is in no way beating them into submission. Regardless your child is supposed to be submissive to the parent to begin with, not the other way around.
And if i wasnt spanked and taught right from wrong then no probably wouldnt know any better. I know many times that people i knew would want me to go and do something illegal with them. My response? "Hell no, my dad would kick my ass if he found out i did that stuff". I was not one to risk punishment. Sometimes though temptation got the better of me and sure enough i paid the price for it.
Scarlet, whoever said anything about being beaten into submission? Youre completely twisting words to suit your own ends. Giving a kid a few whacks on the rump is in no way beating them into submission. Regardless your child is supposed to be submissive to the parent to begin with, not the other way around.
And if i wasnt spanked and taught right from wrong then no probably wouldnt know any better. I know many times that people i knew would want me to go and do something illegal with them. My response? "Hell no, my dad would kick my ass if he found out i did that stuff". I was not one to risk punishment. Sometimes though temptation got the better of me and sure enough i paid the price for it.
It sounds like you still haven't learned right from wrong if you think it's okay to hit those weaker than you. So, you are okay with your boss hitting you when you make a mistake at work, or even just do something they do not like?
You didn't do those things because of fear of being hit...not because you were taught they were wrong in the first place.
Didn't spank any of our kids either and none on drugs, in jail, on welfare, adults all went to college and have successful lives. I contribute it to responsible parents who led by example, were not afraid to be the parent instead of the friend and had enough sense to find alternative positive ways to discipline instead of hitting them.
Scarlet, if i ever come to your house and beat your kids then you can get onto me about how evil I am. Spankings arent about abusing a child. Its about teaching them the error of their ways in a way that will get through to them in no uncertain terms. If you cant understand that then imo you have no business having kids. A child is NOT an equal to the parent.
I swear you people think that we get a running start then leap into the air yelling some battle cry before landing a belt on a child's backside
Scarlet, if i ever come to your house and beat your kids then you can get onto me about how evil I am. Spankings arent about abusing a child. Its about teaching them the error of their ways in a way that will get through to them in no uncertain terms. If you cant understand that then imo you have no business having kids. A child is NOT an equal to the parent.
I swear you people think that we get a running start then leap into the air yelling some battle cry before landing a belt on a child's backside
I usually put on my kilt, paint my face with some war paint before said battle cry. It makes the spanking much more effective. Belt are for wimps. Cat O' Nine Tails for me.
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