Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I just want to say that, as a white woman, I used to think I had hair issues, but I had no idea what black women go through. I'm sorry! I didn't know about all of the socio-political implications tied to how you wear your hair.
For the record, I'm 47 and I let the color grow out on my hair and cut it super short and now I'm sort of salt and pepper--a la Jamie Lee Curtis. But I saw one of those celebrity pics of Jamie Lee followed by lots of comments like "Hello! Hair color!" and "She looks so OLD!" So, really, no one wants us to look like we really look like without lots of chemicals and time-consuming techniques.
Can't we all just wear our hair the way we want to and say "Eff off" to anyone who doesn't like it?
that would be great.......but lots of us wouldn't be employed.
Let's be honest here for a minute.
There are those who dismiss the "slave mind mentality" which is their right. I think that those who dismiss it are very young and unaware of it's history and implementation in our culture or ignorant of the concept because it's not taught in the mainstream educational system and therefore for some has no validity.
The standard of beauty in this country and the world is the European standard.
wide nose=unattractive
large lips=unattractive
kinky or curly hair=unattractive/unprofessional
curvy body=unattractive/overweight
dark skin=unattractive
I saw somewhere on the internet the beauty pageant for thailand or singapore and was struck at how "european" the contestants looked, they looked nothing like the people in the audiance.
There was at one time and may still exist, a surgery where asians could have their eyelids cut to look more european and less asian. The belief being the more "Americanized" you look the further you could go and be accepted.
I understand some of the reasons behind perming black hair such as convienance, but if you go back to the genesis of way we straightened our hair it had nothing to do with convenance and everything to do with looking white.
We had many clubs, churches, organizations, and even funeral homes that would not service you or even aknowledge you if you were dark skinned.
In the Detroit area we have two historic black funeral homes, one headed by "light skinned" and one headed by "dark skinned". The light skinned funeral home would not hold burial services for the dark skinned population.
We all know of the Jack and Jill clubs, brown paper test and fine toothed comb test, all these were in place to simply say that if you did not have enough white blood in you you were unwelcome.
I remember very well growing up being taunted by other children because I was dark skinned. Charcoal, monkey, big lips, chacolite, etc.
I felt unattractive because as an elementary school kid our self esteem is still very fragile' it wasen't untill I got older (pre-teen) and started to research my history and learned that black did not automatically equal ugly, my outlook changed.
How many of us never took that step to self appreciation and discovery, yet underwent the conscious and sub-conscious attack of negativity that being dark carries.
Even today in Africa, the islands, and asian cultures, we see the self choice to render ourselves less "ethnic" and more mainstream "european"
It's just not my opinion or observation, it has been clinically researched and documented.
All I'm saying is whatever your choice for lightening your skin, straightening your hair,etc. it's your right,however don't dismiss the root and present day manifestation of ethnic people attempting to change their appearances in order to look more European.
Don't forget Wacko Jacko. He must have hated to be black badly because he decided to have white kids from white sperm and egg donors as well as bleach his skin whiter than mine.
well my uninformed idiot MJ had vitalgo(sp?) and his dermantologist even stated that he used it so he wouldnt look like a leapard MJ tried to explain this but as dumb and ignorant people are most like gossip and filth, kinda like you how u flamed him and dont know squat lol
Let's be honest here for a minute.
There are those who dismiss the "slave mind mentality" which is their right. I think that those who dismiss it are very young and unaware of it's history and implementation in our culture or ignorant of the concept because it's not taught in the mainstream educational system and therefore for some has no validity.
The standard of beauty in this country and the world is the European standard.
wide nose=unattractive
large lips=unattractive
kinky or curly hair=unattractive/unprofessional
curvy body=unattractive/overweight
dark skin=unattractive
I saw somewhere on the internet the beauty pageant for thailand or singapore and was struck at how "european" the contestants looked, they looked nothing like the people in the audiance.
There was at one time and may still exist, a surgery where asians could have their eyelids cut to look more european and less asian. The belief being the more "Americanized" you look the further you could go and be accepted.
I understand some of the reasons behind perming black hair such as convienance, but if you go back to the genesis of way we straightened our hair it had nothing to do with convenance and everything to do with looking white.
We had many clubs, churches, organizations, and even funeral homes that would not service you or even aknowledge you if you were dark skinned.
In the Detroit area we have two historic black funeral homes, one headed by "light skinned" and one headed by "dark skinned". The light skinned funeral home would not hold burial services for the dark skinned population.
We all know of the Jack and Jill clubs, brown paper test and fine toothed comb test, all these were in place to simply say that if you did not have enough white blood in you you were unwelcome.
I remember very well growing up being taunted by other children because I was dark skinned. Charcoal, monkey, big lips, chacolite, etc.
I felt unattractive because as an elementary school kid our self esteem is still very fragile' it wasen't untill I got older (pre-teen) and started to research my history and learned that black did not automatically equal ugly, my outlook changed.
How many of us never took that step to self appreciation and discovery, yet underwent the conscious and sub-conscious attack of negativity that being dark carries.
Even today in Africa, the islands, and asian cultures, we see the self choice to render ourselves less "ethnic" and more mainstream "european"
It's just not my opinion or observation, it has been clinically researched and documented.
All I'm saying is whatever your choice for lightening your skin, straightening your hair,etc. it's your right,however don't dismiss the root and present day manifestation of ethnic people attempting to change their appearances in order to look more European.
You put this into words so eloquently.....better then I could have.
If we do not learn from the past.........then we are doomed to repeat it!!
Let's be honest here for a minute.
There are those who dismiss the "slave mind mentality" which is their right..
wide nose=unattractive
large lips=unattractive
kinky or curly hair=unattractive/unprofessional
curvy body=unattractive/overweight
dark skin=unattractive
Reconmark, I certainly understand your perspective and I've heard some of these comments before but I guess I've never really been affected by them because I grew up some of everywhere from military bases in NM to all black neighborhoods in FL.
I guess it all depends on the experiences you had as a child. When I was in NM I was often the only black person in my class and I loved being different with my beaded hair and curvy figure I've never thought dark skin was unattractive because my grandfather was very dark (from working in groves and landscaping) and I loved him to pieces. My immediate family ranges in colors from very dark to very light so I've never really thought about which was "better".
When I moved back to FL my whole neighborhood (I mean every house on every street for about 5-6 blocks) was all black and we didn’t really watch a lot of television, except BET and cartoons so the only time we saw white people close-up was at school.
Actually, I grew up on the opposite side of the spectrum primarily thinking the "stereotypical" white features were unattractive: flat butts, limp, plain-looking hair, pale skin, thin lips, etc. One of the worst ways to insult somebody was to say they had or did something like a white person.
My main issues with black stereotypes are the ones that were within the community like:
Dark-skinned girls are more athletic and promiscuous, aggressive, have better figures (i.e bigger butts), and were likely from a poor family and ghetto
Light-skinned girls are smarter and classier, more domicile, came from better neighborhoods and had more money.
My skin tone fell into between the two, I've been called a redbone all my life and when I moved to FL I was shocked by all the things I was "supposed" to be based on my skin tone alone. It was even like this when I first started college; the AKA’s were mostly lighter girls and the Delta’s were the darker girls.
Even now I don’t understand where all these “rules” come from – I guess they can be traced by to slavery though. Lighter people are obviously “supposed” to be smarter, prettier, and more successful because their white ancestry is more noticeable than in their darker counterparts.
My main issues with black stereotypes are the ones that were within the community like:
Dark-skinned girls are more athletic and promiscuous, aggressive, have better figures (i.e bigger butts), and were likely from a poor family and ghetto
Light-skinned girls are smarter and classier, more domicile, came from better neighborhoods and had more money.
In India they actually have the same stereotypes!
Quote:
Originally Posted by natalayjones
Even now I don’t understand where all these “rules” come from – I guess they can be traced by to slavery though. Lighter people are obviously “supposed” to be smarter, prettier, and more successful because their white ancestry is more noticeable than in their darker counterparts.
Not only slavery.
Whether we like it or not, Europeans has had the hegemony over the last centuries. So this is what we're left with. Yet we needn't forget that changes are going on. Societies are not static, contrary to what most of us would like to believe.
Reconmark is right about this:
Quote:
Originally Posted by reconmark
The standard of beauty in this country and the world is the European standard.
Interestingly, it seems that here in Europe is where you find most appreciation for non-European features.
To me it has alot to do with how are you taught to feel about yourself in early developement. I am a darkskinned woman, and I have been complimented almost everyday of my 3o something year old life, by all people; black, white hispanic and even asian has paid hommage to my hershy colored skin. I believe it has a lot to do with ones self worth. It goes far beyond the color of ones skin but the "content of their character."
Reconmark, I certainly understand your perspective and I've heard some of these comments before but I guess I've never really been affected by them because I grew up some of everywhere from military bases in NM to all black neighborhoods in FL.
I guess it all depends on the experiences you had as a child. When I was in NM I was often the only black person in my class and I loved being different with my beaded hair and curvy figure I've never thought dark skin was unattractive because my grandfather was very dark (from working in groves and landscaping) and I loved him to pieces. My immediate family ranges in colors from very dark to very light so I've never really thought about which was "better".
When I moved back to FL my whole neighborhood (I mean every house on every street for about 5-6 blocks) was all black and we didn’t really watch a lot of television, except BET and cartoons so the only time we saw white people close-up was at school.
Actually, I grew up on the opposite side of the spectrum primarily thinking the "stereotypical" white features were unattractive: flat butts, limp, plain-looking hair, pale skin, thin lips, etc. One of the worst ways to insult somebody was to say they had or did something like a white person.
My main issues with black stereotypes are the ones that were within the community like:
Dark-skinned girls are more athletic and promiscuous, aggressive, have better figures (i.e bigger butts), and were likely from a poor family and ghetto
Light-skinned girls are smarter and classier, more domicile, came from better neighborhoods and had more money.
My skin tone fell into between the two, I've been called a redbone all my life and when I moved to FL I was shocked by all the things I was "supposed" to be based on my skin tone alone. It was even like this when I first started college; the AKA’s were mostly lighter girls and the Delta’s were the darker girls.
Even now I don’t understand where all these “rules” come from – I guess they can be traced by to slavery though. Lighter people are obviously “supposed” to be smarter, prettier, and more successful because their white ancestry is more noticeable than in their darker counterparts.
The issues of colorism are only as powerful as we let them be in our lives. The problem comes only when each individual decides to internalize the stereotypes.
There are light-skinned Blacks, even to this day, who have internalized the stereotypes and believe that they are entitled to special privileges based sole on their coloring. Its really sad when these same people are not "rewarded" in life based solely on their lighter color because they believed the stereotype that being "light skinned" will get you a better mate, better job, more money, bigger house, etc. without having to work for it.
Black achievement in America is no longer based on where you fit on the color wheel. Even the election of Obama (with his dark skinned wife) flies in the face of the purpose of many Black High Society organizations. Barack and Michelle Obama would NEVER have been admitted into many of the most elite Black organizations (in the past and even today). The fact that the first Black family in the White House isn't "high yellow" is of great surprise to many of these people who live and die by the color code of the paper bag test.
While it is wonderful that we have finally achieved having some people in the whitehouse who share our racial background in my opinion we are still not past being "color struck" in this society. Michelle Obama may be darker skinned but Barack is half white and lighter skinned.
My question is would Barack have been elected president if he would have been all black and darker skinned?
My question is would Barack have been elected president if he would have been all black and darker skinned?
What do you mean all black?
There's no mistaking that he's a man of African ancestry. His skin tone is irrelevant - NOBODY VOTES BY SKIN TONE YOU VOTE FOR THE INDIVIDUAL!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.