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Not much really. All of the big life obstacles are done. I guess i'm waiting to bury my parents as i wouldn't want them to have to deal with burying me. But when they are gone, there will be nothing left. The thing is, that doesn't bother me or even make me sad. I accomplished everything I wanted, had a great time and have few regrets. I lived pretty carefree and traveled a lot when younger. I was fortunate to have the funds and saw no reason to wait until I was retired to see the world. If you are done working, have no more living relatives, what would be the point?
....... If you are done working, have no more living relatives, what would be the point?
The point would be that life can still be interesting, satisfying, gratifying, challenging, and very enjoyable even if you are done working and have no more living relatives.
If perseverance and self-protection are genetic, then surely those early humans who lacked such proclivity, are not our ancestors. What keeps us going is our genes, and the brain-chemistry that they entail.
But such a broad explanation is no explanation at all. We must do better.
For most of us, two ingredients are essential: something that we do for others, and something that we do for ourselves. Neither trumps the other; both are crucial. But in the first case, it's sufficient to just be present, to be a listener. For the second, it is necessary to pursue (though not necessarily attain) some excellence and uniqueness.
Though I'm an engineer by profession, what I've been most enjoying in recent years is writing. In fact this very Forum is an outlet. Recently I came across an older temporary employee in our organization, who enjoys poetry, and writes a bit himself. We've exchanged collections of poems, and the emotional impact has been astonishingly profound – entirely beyond the expected humdrum compliments and pleasantries. So that combines the two ingredients, the interaction with others and the achievement for oneself. Is it enough? No! Life is long, so very long; and filling it honorably and productively is no minor feat. Perhaps what animates us most isn't the chasing of gains or the satisfaction of desire, but a feeling of duty. Though I enjoy writing, I feel a sense of duty to keep writing, however little and however poorly. Living just means doing our duty.
The chief impediment to happiness isn't lack of creativity or being trapped in some unfulfilling career, or even lack of fortitude. No. The chief impediment is a gnawing guilt, that we frittered away our opportunities, that we'll never measure up, that we are ingrates and fools who deserve the suffering under which we burden, that to better ourselves would be disingenuous and vain, if not outright immoral.
Quote:
Originally Posted by don1945
The lowest point I ever had in my entire life was when I went through my divorce
Me too. The loss of a loved-one through divorce must be akin, I dare say, to her death. It's been years now, but I still mourn her loss, however much the grief asymptotes to mere acquiescence.
Quote:
Originally Posted by texdav
The question to me is why would anyone want to die unless really sick and in pain. Makes no sense at all to me as I love life but do not fear death being a Christian.
Persons of religious persuasion will likely hold their personal lives and personal existence as part of some vast continuum, headed by a benevolent agent. This does not necessarily ameliorate daily suffering or frustrations, but it does place things in context. And context offers meaning. it offers reason to embrace life, warts and all. Sometimes - nay, often - I envy religious people their capacity to externalize the individualistic, finding connection with an external reality beyond the measurable and the calculable.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Odo
Recreational travel is inherently selfish and serves the same purpose as watching a movie-- it's all about killing your boredom. ...
Agreed. This is why the thing that animates us can't just be a personal leisure activity. It has to involve others, and it has to be in some palpable way productive.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Neuling
I guess once you have a girlfriend, you will automatically be happier
The smiley-face is quite appropriate. Rapport with a romantic partner is a substantial achievement in life, something to be celebrated and keenly desired. And yet the company of another will not turn a melancholic cheerful. And given our modern dating constructs, a melancholy disposition is not "attractive", rendering it all the more difficult to find a life-partner, trapping us in a loop of isolation.
Love. And self-improvement. Always wanting to better myself and my and my husband's life together, in small or big ways. I guess another word for it is hope.
You say "if you're done working in life, then what would be the point of going forward with life".
A vast number of us find JOY and great ENJOYMENT in not needing to work and being retired!
It's fun! It is lovely to be out of the race of making a living, and out of the confines of spending every weekday at work and commuting. And needing to go to bed at a reasonable hour and get up early. Working was often grueling and very tiring.
Every hour of the day in retirement is freedom, and you can shape your life any way you please.
The key is to have a lot of interests in life. I have tons of interests which keep me enlivened.
Seriously what is the point of being alive? What motivates you/keeps you going?
Originally for me it was my career, my career = ME but i've come to find out that my career does not even come close to defining who I am as a person or my psyche. Now I am kind of at a loss as to how to find out what keeps me going/motivated.
I just don't know any more, is it having my own family one day, people that care about me or friends?
I live for passion, for learning, for understanding.. My purpose in life is to explore. Ultimately, to give back someway somehow all the gifts given to me.
I think for most people the purpose in life is to find love- love in something we do, love in our relationships, and love for the simple things in life. And, if people aren't loving what they're doing, they're doing something wrong.
Love is like light. Without having love in your life (for your own self), there is no purpose, no direction, no movement. And, I wonder if many people know what love truly is when we live in a society that judges and treats people according to their monetary (not personal) worth a.k.a. dignity.
I would not say that not having love in one's life is necessarily a big deficit for everyone.
I mean in having significant others in one's life. (having love for simple things in life and/or activities or the beauty of nature is different)
Plenty of people - especially older adults - do not have a significant other in their life. Also, most of their relatives are either dead - especially passed away parents - or they are not close with siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles - often because they lived in far flung different states where they do not get to know each other. And plenty of older adults either do not have children, or are not particularly emotionally and/or geographically close with their children. And sometimes one finds oneself without close friends.
It can be wonderful to have significant others in one's life at any age, but I hesitate to say that it is the major meaning of life - because that leaves out all of the older adults which I describe above.
Older adults fitting the categories I describe above can have love for many other things in life as they simultaneously find themselves without emotionally close significant others in life. Love of each new day, love of art, appreciation of nature and its beauty, for examples.
Seriously what is the point of being alive? What motivates you/keeps you going?
Originally for me it was my career, my career = ME but i've come to find out that my career does not even come close to defining who I am as a person or my psyche. Now I am kind of at a loss as to how to find out what keeps me going/motivated.
I just don't know any more, is it having my own family one day, people that care about me or friends?
Tomorrow is what keeps me going. There is always a new experience and new chance. You might say that living for the future is not very Zen. That all we "really" have is the here and now, but that is not what keeps me going.
Plans for tomorrow, next week, next year, next planting season. Planning for future vacations, excursions, experiences. I can hardly wait for the next day to see what happens.
As far as job/career, I have never been one to stick to one thing very long because there are too many things to do and to be. I am always learning new skills have new interests and wonder if "that" job might be fun. And if it isn't, well heck, there is another one out there somewhere.
What keeps me going? Nothing, really. I wake up and go on existing day after day.
Last edited by Moe'sTavern; 06-20-2014 at 04:40 PM..
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