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Hang on, no need to go on the attack. Relax. I am wondering what you guys think as I am often so confused about my feelings.
Is he right – if in his eyes I have treated him like crap does he in fact have a right to speak to me like that?
OR
Is he completely out of line?
He is out of line no matter what. 2 wrongs don't make a right you know....and given what you say you did i don't see how he could even think you treat him like crap. He is just a little boy pissy because god forbid you ruin his chance to see a sports event.
Thank you for that completely unnecessary, salt in the wound comment..
Perhaps that will make you realize you need to leave him yes? Too often people will sugarcoat it rather then tell the truth. She is right....maybe a bit harsh but you can do better.
Sometimes, loves, I wonder if you are actually connected with the reality of the rest of the world
<runs for cover now>
When you have credentials as a mental health professional THEN you can critisize what I do and don't know Ant, and I know you are too high tech in the financial industry to have likely even had psych 101 in college.
The reality is, YOU are the one not connected to the reality of the what makes people tick
We all have heard it, but some of us choose to rise above it. Being blind or deaf doesn't mean you have to hand the jerk your brain cells. Are you proud of being dumb?
THAT^^ is so true!
BINGO!
Kudos to you, Busta.
You're exactly right, Busta. Whether it's a food addiction, smoking, or drinking/drugs, in order to change the addiction, one has to change their environment. Busta did by convincing his wife to stop drinking along with him - different environment. I quit smoking on a cruise. Your b/f (if you insist on calling him that) is trying to give up food AND his drug of choice. BUT
NONE OF THAT EXCUSES his being abusive. OR you being abusive/callous. You are obviously both dumb (your choice of phrase) and are calling this co-dependent living together arrangement a relationship of love is proof of your dumb-ness. WAKE up. Coffee's on!
Thanks for the kudos NY Annie.
And you are so right about it being no excuse for this guys behavior.
My wife would never put up with me acting that way, nor should she.
Also, if my daughter's BF treated her this way he would have to answer to me and I doubt he would like the outcome.
I don't understand why some people allow others to treat them bad when it's so easy to find someone who will treat you good.
Ok let me make one thing clear: he is not an alcoholic.
You should learn to post more clearly because this sure sounds like he is.
(My boyfriend is currently on a diet and off the alcohol.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by *VaNiLlaGoRrilLa*
Same with me. My dad was abusive towards my mom both verbally and physically. I remember even as a child, yelling at her to leave him, much the same as you guys are doing now with me.
Children learn from parents so it's a very good chance that you will put up with this type of treatment because it's ingrained into your way of thinking from your parents lifestyle.
The appropriate question would be why do you stay?
Because I keep hoping things will change.
Because even though I feel like I have never been treated worse in a relationship, I also feel like I have never been treated better. 90% of the time things are amazing between us (yes, believe it or not) and I don’t know if I want to give that up for the 10% where things are bad.
Because I am confused as all hell. Whenever I tell people of the good things he does for me, they tell me how rare and wonderful a man like that is.
Because it means starting all over again after 9 years.
Because it means losing a friendship that was there before the relationship, one that means a lot to me (yes it would be gone, there is no way he’d remain friends with me, yes I know that for sure).
Because it means dealing with all this behaviour of his, TEN FOLD.
Because I am petrified..
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