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Oh! And as for a coffee date, I had a couple/few of these. Found them very nice! Where I used to live, we had a SB right in the center of town and it was an easy stroll from there to a nice, long, gorgeous walk in the springtime or autumn up all around town and down to the city's park and gazebo.
I found it all a very low-key, relaxed way to meet and it was so easy to go on from there if I wanted to...or not go on from there if I didn't.
I don't have a problem with them. I think they are sort of necessary. It gives you a chance to decide if you want to date this person in a safe environment. If you go out on a 'real' date, you are stuck for hours. Coffee? If it's bad you can be out in less than a half hour. And you got some coffee.
Like 'em, myself, but the fact that I love coffee has quite a bit to do with that. They're simple, innocuous, allow you to focus on the person and not the surroundings/food/etc. And if things go well, you can always continue from there.
I was thinking that. Starbucks = hipster dorks??? Probably not since about 1990. I mean good heavens. I live in Pretentiousness Central (Los Angeles area) and the Starbucks by me are filled with all sorts of different people, including the elderly (the only dudes who read the Times in paper while there, LOL), kids coming in after school for a triple-whipped sugar whatever...etc.
This is not much of an endorsement for Starbucks as a great dating environment.
This is not much of an endorsement for Starbucks as a great dating environment.
That's the point...it's relaxed, it's casual and there are no expectations. Perfect particularly for people who have just met (i.e. met in the internet or what-have-you).
But then you do need to know how to just relax and be yourself to do this. You have to be able to carry a conversation, too. Some people like many more distractions than this on a first date. Everyone is different.
That's the point...it's relaxed, it's casual and there are no expectations. Perfect particularly for people who have just met (i.e. met in the internet or what-have-you).
But then you do need to know how to just relax and be yourself to do this. You have to be able to carry a conversation, too. Some people like many more distractions than this on a first date. Everyone is different.
Having kids and elderly people banging around is to much of a distraction to have a real conversation. Starbucks plays loud music, is crassly commercial, and there is a constant flow of people walking around. I like the person to be able to hear what I say, and I want to be able to hear the other person. I don't mind a silent environment, and I prefer people who don't mind silence too. But of course, as you said, you have to be comfortable with yourself to enjoy a scene quieter than Starbucks. That Starbucks works for you is fine, but it's too loud and impersonal for my tastes.
Not all coffee shops are created equal. I'm not a Starbuck's fan, I don't really care for their coffee (always has a burnt taste) and they have no character. Usually a bunch of loners and students with their faces buried in their iPads and smart phones.
If coffee shop dates are your thing, two of my favorite NYC coffee shops are Di Roberti's on 1st Ave and 11th St. and Ferrara on Grand and Mulberry St. in Little Italy. Of the two, Ferrara is busier, larger, and has slightly better coffee and pastry. Each of these places is over 100 years old with original interiors and a more cozy feel to them than the chain coffee shops.
I think coffee shops make a good starting ground or end point for a date. I would prefer dating locations that are conducive to conversation. That's why I don't think movies or plays make for an ideal first date. Not a whole lot of "getting to know you" going on. I think a combination of coffee shop and museum/gallery makes a good first date.
Di Roberti's possibly has the best canoli in NYC and yes, it is a very cozy coffee shop, a place that I would find perfect for the first date. I should have mentioned it earlier but OP requested places in Brooklyn.
Di Roberti's possibly has the best canoli in NYC and yes, it is a very cozy coffee shop, a place that I would find perfect for the first date. I should have mentioned it earlier but OP requested places in Brooklyn.
I'm not big on foo-foo coffee drinks, but once in a while I like to have a cappucino or latte and Di Roberti's makes the best.
There is a good restaurant just down the street, Lanza's, which is a nice place to get lunch or dinner then walk down to Di Roberti's for an after meal coffee.
BTW, best pastry in Brooklyn...or just about anywhere, Villabate on 18th Ave in Bensonhurst. Best Cannoli anywhere! Unforunately there is nowhere to sit, so you have to take it to go.
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You have to be able to carry a conversation, too. Some people like many more distractions than this on a first date. Everyone is different.
