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If a woman marries a man who makes less money and/or has less education, she's often seen as marrying down. But if a man does the same thing, the worst that happens is that people will wonder if the woman is a gold digger. Few will accuse the man of settling unless the income/education disparity is huge, a billionaire CEO marrying a waitress for example.
As women become more educated and earn higher incomes, doesn't it make sense to revise the definition of marrying down? I was on a dating site once and saw a profile where a woman listed that she had a post-graduate degree and made over 150K. Good for her, I thought. But then I saw what she was looking for in a partner. Must have a post-graduate degree and must make over 150K. Hmm. Isn't that setting the bar pretty high? Perhaps that's why you hear women say there are no good men left.
I was on a dating site once and saw a profile where a woman listed that she had a post-graduate degree and made over 150K. Good for her, I thought. But then I saw what she was looking for in a partner. Must have a post-graduate degree and must make over 150K. Hmm. Isn't that setting the bar pretty high?
That depends on how hot she is. If she thinks that men care about her salary, then that probably explains why she's still single.
I remember seeing a profile of a high-earning fat girl, who described herself as a "raging feminist," who laid out her expectations: a high-earning man who would be her equal. I got a good laugh out of that one.
Hmmmm. I think that if you look at billionaires. You would see that they are either into serial marriages or marry someone like minded. Bill Gates married an employee who had a degree in Computer Science and Economics. So she knew a lot of programming like Bill did. And that is probably what sealed the deal with him. He saw an attractive woman that was into computers as much as he was.
Then you have others who marry their secretaries multiple times, why? Because they are younger and that is it. You can find examples of a billionaire marrying at the age of 72 to a 40 year old secretary. Why can he do that? Because he is rich and just wants to marry someone substantially to forget about his age.
I think of the women I have seen born into money. They are rich and attractive. They are going to have their pick of whoever they want. And its not wrong for them to marry into money. Its the value their parents place into them as young kids. So it can't be stopped. You have no chance of succeeding with a woman, especially if she earns more than you. Unless you met her before she became a high-income earner or if she is born rich not a chance unless you are.
That depends on how hot she is. If she thinks that men care about her salary, then that probably explains why she's still single.
It's not about what she thinks men will think of her. It's about what she thinks is acceptable for her given that she makes so much money. If you have two women who are exactly the same only one makes 50K while the other makes 200K and both think marrying someone who makes less is marrying down, then it stands to reason that the woman making 200K is going to have a much harder time because her standards are much higher than those of the other woman.
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Originally Posted by stan4
Why does marrying up or down have anything to do with $$$?
I didn't say I agree it, but this is how a lot of people think.
It's not about what she thinks men will think of her. It's about what she thinks is acceptable for her given that she makes so much money. If you have two women who are exactly the same only one makes 50K while the other makes 200K and both think marrying someone who makes less is marrying down, then it stands to reason that the woman making 200K is going to have a much harder time because her standards are much higher than those of the other woman.
I didn't say I agree it, but this is how a lot of people think.
she may need to re-evaluate her standards, they may not be feasable
It's probably why she's alone and on a dating site
This is true. Many people want a custom person and will not bend or give anyone a chance unless they meet the criteria. And this applies to both sexes as I see this from men.
People are not made of gingerbread where they are from the same mold. And that's what I always find interesting. You have good people who are "diamonds in the rough", you have rebels and individualists, you have conservative people and people who are everything in between. And we all have our flaws. To pass up a good person who you might have a connection with is the reason many are alone.
Learn about the man/woman within. Look deeper. Then decide. We miss every shot we don't take.
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Great attitude!
