Ladies: Which of the following would turn you off to a man? (husband, family)
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The food stamps are a big turn off there is nothing sexy about being cheep. If he knew he can't afford a "romantic dinner" then why go shopping in the first place?
Um... Needing food stamps is not a sign of being "cheep" or even cheap - it is about not having that much money. And if someone doesn't have a lot of money - but wanted to use their food stamps to make me a romantic dinner - honestly, that would kind of be the opposite of cheap. And for someone who lives with her parents and thinks maybe guys don't like her because she doesn't have a lot of money - isn't this slightly judgemental of you?
Ok, the food stamps thing? Let me clue you ALL in that yeah, sure, sometimes a man with EBT is a lazy bum, but SOMETIMES< like in MY case, We're disabled and the government knows, that without us being able to work, we need assistance with daily living. I will admit, i am rather offended by some of you who are turned off that someone is getting help. At least he aint mooching off family and friends or letting his health or situation worsen. Do you have any idea how hard it IS to ask for help? Or to even admit you cant do something so you cant provide for yourself??? I consider myself proud i got the help i need, and trust me, it aint easy for me. Do i find myself feeling inadequate, or down about my situation? You betcha! If i could change it and be financially stable would I? In a friggen heartbeat. But my disability makes doing things i have experience doing, like oh, say 4 and a half YEARS of contracting and handyman experience, which would easily pay the bills. Am i a bum because my body aint perfect? I still try to do my best at everything i do, and am fighting with debt people so i can afford to get back into college and make a life of myself outside of government assistance. SO, am I a turn off now? Am I suddenly undesireable you shallow jerks? This message is in no way aimed at all of you out there, but only those who are heartless and belief that foodstamps=lazy bum not worth a ****....
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Sorry for the rant, i just think so many people out there look down on some of us who have these things, and it isn't right. I am very passionate about my fellow man or woman, and always been a huge supporter of having an open mind and trying to understand where people are coming from. I guess I just felt it was my duty to point out that it really is based on individual situations, like Julie said. Thank you. Although seeing the edited comment it makes me wonder why the EBT situation all of a sudden aint ok with you? Is it just because your with him when he does it? Aint that kind of a double standard to your previous commentary? No offense, of course.
I can see why you are taking offense, and I wanted to clarify myself.
I viewed the poll AS IF I were back in my 20's and the way I thought about the world back then & dating, and then placed myself in the scenarios put forth by the OP.
"we were shopping together for a romantic dinner"
I think at this point, if I were in the grocery store with a date, I would KNOW a little bit about them, and if they were disabled or going through a rough patch, I think I would know it and be able to deduce if the food stamps had to do with lack of drive & motivation in life or special circumstances.
In my post it was about that showing a lack of drive & motivation in life.
I would have to say #3...what would we have in commom..I'm a Jehovah Witness...so no....
I think this is the second post of your's that you have mentioned being a JW or at least referring to them.
So are you?
I have a lot of family & friends who are, so I am just curious if you are a JW or you just like to joke about them a lot? Or both you are and you joke about it.....(although I must admit, most of the JW's I know don't joke about it too often because they usually have to deal with people giving them a hard time and they simply can't find the humor in the jokes at their expense anymore)
1. You are grocery shopping for a romantic dinner. You go through the check-out line and are ready to pay when your date pulls out an EBT card and casually swipes it through the card reader, paying for your meal with food stamps.
2. You are invited to your date's apartment. You think he lives alone; however, when you arrive, you are surprised to see both of their parents sitting on the couch watching TV. They greet you. You later learn your date lives with his parents.
3. You are on your third date and somehow religion is brought up. You learn your date is a devout Catholic, attends Mass every Sunday and occasionally goes to weekday Mass, and the talk eventually turns to your date's opposition to pre-marital sex.
4. Your date is driving you home from a long drive when the car begins to loaf. He says, "Oops, we ran out of gas! Sorry!". They have their brother run them up fuel, which takes an hour.
All of the above are a turn off.
1. Rough patch or disability - not looking to bring that willingly into my life.
2. Parents - really...if it was not a between places situation with a new place lined up...I havent dated anyone who lived with parents since I was 16. So no. Not looking for parental hovering, lack of privacy, or poverty.
3. Just not my values. Friend zoned.
4. I can not stand poor planning. And also that can be seen as creepy. Oh I ran out gas....yeh dude...good thing I have lots of mace.
To me running out of gas is a sign of reckless and irresponsible behavior. It rarely has anything to do with money.
I agree with this one, most definetly!
Turn off-
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I can't see a church boy of any kind in my orbit, either.
