Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Okay ...
I love my husband very much he is a good man for the most part, I understand that no one is perfect but I have a problem..I FEEL SO UNAPPRECIATED AND LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN NOTICE ME HALF THE TIME WHEN I WALK INTO A ROOM!
all women are different but many of us are emotional for the most part i do think.. and we need attention especially when we are married!
Okay this is still new to me our first year of marriage I thought that it should be unconditional and overflowing love and support from each other.. but my husband holds his past over my head..
he used to not be able to do certain things that he can do now in a previous marriage but i let him do it and instead of thanking me he goes in panic mode and gets upset and mad about things.. I am blamed or nagged for every little thing lately and on top of that his family has not only disowned me but him as well..
No matter what i do it feels like its never good enough..
and i thought after you get married IT ENTITLES YOU TO LOTS AND LOTS OF ROMANCE.. where did it go?
So i am a full time college student, wife and juggle my own life.. my husband has his first day off and he goes fishing.. which i don't have a problem with that I ENCOURAGED HIM TO GO.. but then after he leaves from our friends.. he decides to yell at me then goes to sleep..
I FEEL SO UNLOVED.. and I NEED SOME HELP.. what do i do people???
Okay, the reality is, and I mean this in the nicest way possible - water seeks its own level.
In other words, he has issues - but so do you for choosing him in the first place.
Your problem is not "lack of romance" - I WISH it were that simple.
Do yourself a huge favor and contact a marriage counselor immediately.
You guys need some professional guidance, and someone to teach you better communication skills.
Best of luck, but until you get to the root of the problem don't expect much romance, or respect.
Okay ...
I love my husband very much he is a good man for the most part, I understand that no one is perfect but I have a problem..I FEEL SO UNAPPRECIATED AND LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN NOTICE ME HALF THE TIME WHEN I WALK INTO A ROOM!
all women are different but many of us are emotional for the most part i do think.. and we need attention especially when we are married!
Okay this is still new to me our first year of marriage I thought that it should be unconditional and overflowing love and support from each other.. but my husband holds his past over my head..
he used to not be able to do certain things that he can do now in a previous marriage but i let him do it and instead of thanking me he goes in panic mode and gets upset and mad about things.. I am blamed or nagged for every little thing lately and on top of that his family has not only disowned me but him as well..
No matter what i do it feels like its never good enough..
and i thought after you get married IT ENTITLES YOU TO LOTS AND LOTS OF ROMANCE.. where did it go?
So i am a full time college student, wife and juggle my own life.. my husband has his first day off and he goes fishing.. which i don't have a problem with that I ENCOURAGED HIM TO GO.. but then after he leaves from our friends.. he decides to yell at me then goes to sleep..
I FEEL SO UNLOVED.. and I NEED SOME HELP.. what do i do people???
Being married doesn't entitle you to anything.
Romance is pretty much something that was manufactured by romance novel writers. It does not exist in reality.
Please pick up a copy of the book "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" and read it, if you want your marriage to survive.
This is a classic case of a guy thinking because he already secured what he wanted and put a ring on her finger, that he can just go ahead and put the situation on auto pilot and his wife will always be around. Thats why divorce is such a great equalizer in this society. As a way out, it should be used by women that do not feel they are appreciated by their husbands to get them back where they were during the courting stage.
At one point, I specialized in "dating" married women, well not really dating, but when and if I met a married woman that was hot and things developed where I got to know her more, then it turned out great. Most overweight, married, sports watching husbands never think that their wives have a way out and through their own selfish behavior, deny the women they are with the lives they deserve.
Basically, all she needs (if shes hot) is another guy to come along, pay attention to her, validate her existence, listen, look into her eyes like she is the only woman on Earth, and get her off harder, longer and better and whether or not it works out or not is irrelevant. At that point, all of the control and options are back in her court and she can start getting her husband back on board with being a real man again or check out. Until she takes that card out of the deck and throws it down, she will remain powerless and at the mercy of a grown up man child that does not respect her. He might love her, but he doesn't show it.
In one of the final relationships I had like that during that stage of my life, it was interesting to study the psychology of a husband just like hers. As soon as he knew about the affair and noticed the subtle changes in her that were the result of being loved and wanted (once again thanks to my services which at the time ranged from simple attention and time together to all out F fests), which were her losing some weight, being happier and more confident combined with taking control of her life - he turned things on a whole new level and started being the husband he should have been for years, and made honest, actual attempts at winning her back. I couldn't help but look at the situation at times and wonder just how positive an effect the affair had on her marriage and the impact it had on idiot boy's behavior and need to be with her. I should have charged him for that five month gap in my life. Anyway, he was so completely committed to being a good husband, fixing things and showing his love for her that we agreed she should try to work things out - and they worked out great. I'm kind of like a Dr. Phil with a more direct and practical approach.
If she wants the man she married back, she needs to show him that she can be loved and wanted by another man, and make sure she gets caught doing it and gets the appropriate response from her husband. Only then will she be able to control the logistical game known as her marriage and start calling the shots.
Good grief, real grownups don't play these kinds of games with one another
I find your advice to be sick, twisted and disgusting.
Good grief, real grownups don't play these kinds of games with one another
I find your advice to be sick, twisted and disgusting.
Yes. Its just repeating the bad pattern of relying on others for validation.
Turning outward to fix an internal problem just leaves a mess to fall into. It doesn't fix anything. The problem is both sets of people. So you just keep repeating the problem. Even if you were with a new person...it will rise up again.
all women are different but many of us are emotional for the most part i do think.. and we need attention especially when we are married!
I thought that it should be unconditional and overflowing love and support from each other..
and i thought after you get married IT ENTITLES YOU TO LOTS AND LOTS OF ROMANCE.. where did it go?
You've officially scared me away from ever wanting to get married and given me very good insight into the expectations of a woman. The entitlement statement made me throw up in my mouth a little bit...
You've officially scared me away from ever wanting to get married and given me very good insight into the expectations of a woman. The entitlement statement made me throw up in my mouth a little bit...
WOW! One post from one person can have that much influence on you? Please contact me asap as I have a couple of REALLY cool bridges to sell you.
Okay ...
I love my husband very much he is a good man for the most part, I understand that no one is perfect but I have a problem..I FEEL SO UNAPPRECIATED AND LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN NOTICE ME HALF THE TIME WHEN I WALK INTO A ROOM!
all women are different but many of us are emotional for the most part i do think.. and we need attention especially when we are married!
Okay this is still new to me our first year of marriage I thought that it should be unconditional and overflowing love and support from each other.. but my husband holds his past over my head..
he used to not be able to do certain things that he can do now in a previous marriage but i let him do it and instead of thanking me he goes in panic mode and gets upset and mad about things.. I am blamed or nagged for every little thing lately and on top of that his family has not only disowned me but him as well..
No matter what i do it feels like its never good enough..
and i thought after you get married IT ENTITLES YOU TO LOTS AND LOTS OF ROMANCE.. where did it go?
So i am a full time college student, wife and juggle my own life.. my husband has his first day off and he goes fishing.. which i don't have a problem with that I ENCOURAGED HIM TO GO.. but then after he leaves from our friends.. he decides to yell at me then goes to sleep..
I FEEL SO UNLOVED.. and I NEED SOME HELP.. what do i do people???
Talk to him? We don't know you.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
...
