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how is that an ignorant mentality. If my own race isnt attracted to me, why cant I feel the same?
Your logic makes no sense, sorry. You have not met every single Black woman on this earth, so to say that your own race isn't attracted to you will never be true. I believe there are negative qualities within yourself that you have out on the forefront that are just repelling women in general, but unfortunately you've internalized this and turn it into a race issue. That being said, something about you intrigued your, white, girlfriend. The same could have happened and you could have ended up with a Black woman, too. Life is crazy that way.
Hell, I'm a Black-Hispanic woman who is seeing a white girl, but I will never say that I'm not attracted to Black men or women and they're not attracted to me because it simply isn't true. You fall in love with the person and their personality, and that match can be found in any race or ethnicity. You need to do some soul-searching, my friend because I would hate to see this internalized racism (which is what you are experiencing) being passed on to your children, should you choose to have any.
Quote:
Originally Posted by nj21
I don't use it as an excuse. But I do know because I am a Black woman and most people DO stereotype, certain people of different races will not want to date me.
If I had a nickel for every time I've heard a guy specifically state that he will only date White, Asian, or Hispanic (despite this not being a race) girls, I'd be rich and I'm not joking. Black women do get the shaft in the dating process when it comes to being with other races, and it is upsetting. Though, I often find it funny when guys say that they love Hispanic chicks, but when I point out that I'm Hispanic they do a spit-take. Attractive Hispanic women seem to only lie along the color spectrum of Cameron Diaz to Jessica Alba, when really you can have Hispanic/Latin women from Juliana Imai (She's Japanese-Brazilian, so Latin works) all the way to darker than Zoe Saldana. Quel surprise!
Last edited by silverbelles; 06-20-2012 at 05:23 PM..
In my opinion, people shouldn't use "race" as a criteria for dating, period.
It's very limiting. They shouldn't limit themselves to certain "races" they should be open to date anybody they have something in common with. Your perfect mate could be from any background, born anywhere on the planet, why limit yourself.
But social psychology sais that the more qualities a man and a woman share in common such as general attitudes, familiar backgrounds, environments, worldviews, and maybe even genetic similarity, the more probable it is that they will be attracted to each other.
The problem today is that people really do not understand social psychology.
how is that an ignorant mentality. If my own race isnt attracted to me, why cant I feel the same?
Who really says my RACE is not attracted to me??? No sir, it's the women that you tried to get with that were not attracted to you. I had a couple of relationships with black guys that didn't work out before I met my husband. I did date a white guy for a few months too, but at no point did it ever occur to me to say black men are too much drama I no longer like them.
Your logic makes no sense, sorry. You have not met every single Black woman on this earth, so to say that your own race isn't attracted to you will never be true. I believe there are negative qualities within yourself that you have out on the forefront that are just repelling women in general, but unfortunately you've internalized this and turn it into a race issue. That being said, something about you intrigued your, white, girlfriend. The same could have happened and you could have ended up with a Black woman, too. Life is crazy that way.
Hell, I'm a Black-Hispanic woman who is seeing a white girl, but I will never say that I'm not attracted to Black men or women and they're not attracted to me because it simply isn't true. You fall in love with the person and their personality, and that match can be found in any race or ethnicity. You need to do some soul-searching, my friend because I would hate to see this internalized racism (which is what you are experiencing) being passed on to your children, should you choose to have any.
If I had a nickel for every time I've heard a guy specifically state that he will only date White, Asian, or Hispanic (despite this not being a race) girls, I'd be rich and I'm not joking. Black women do get the shaft in the dating process when it comes to being with other races, and it is upsetting. Though, I often find it funny when guys say that they love Hispanic chicks, but when I point out that I'm Hispanic they do a spit-take. Attractive Hispanic women seem to only lie along the color spectrum of Cameron Diaz to Jessica Alba, when really you can have Hispanic/Latin women from Juliana Imai (She's Japanese-Brazilian, so Latin works) all the way to darker than Zoe Saldana. Quel surprise!
I would have agreed with that statement if women of other races were rejecting me too, but the reality for me is, it was black women that I wasnt having success with. When it came to other women of different races, i was doing just fine. Those qualities I apparently have must have only been negative to blackwomen.
Another thing, I dont hate black women. If my son finds a black woman to marry, I'll the happiest guy in the world. I think any guy would be lucky to be with a black woman, but for me I dont find black women attractive.
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Race is a very big thing to why someone may or may not want to date. Perconceived notions, stereotypes, worrying about what their friends family and society thinks, reproducing (mixed children) and just plain not being attracted to your race , is very real . If it werent then their would be more interracial dating and we wouldn't have to have 20 page threads on it.
Who really says my RACE is not attracted to me??? No sir, it's the women that you tried to get with that were not attracted to you. I had a couple of relationships with black guys that didn't work out before I met my husband. I did date a white guy for a few months too, but at no point did it ever occur to me to say black men are too much drama I no longer like them.
Couple of points. You said you had a couple of relationships with black guys, I never had any relationships with black women. I was rejected 99% of the time. I never said black women are too much drama. I think black women are great and any guy who ends with a black woman is lucky. The reality is, with other races, i was going fine, but when it came to black women, nothing but crickets.
Couple of points. You said you had a couple of relationships with black guys, I never had any relationships with black women. I was rejected 99% of the time. I never said black women are too much drama. I think black women are great and any guy who ends with a black woman is lucky. The reality is, with other races, i was going fine, but when it came to black women, nothing but crickets.
What do you think it is about you that is such a turnoff to all black women? And why do you believe white women feel differently?
What do you think it is about you that is such a turnoff to all black women? And why do you believe white women feel differently?
This is fascinating.
black women didnt find me attractive, but white women did.
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