Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Of course not all women are like this...I didn't say I've given up, or stopped dating completely. And yes, I've been burned countless times, so I'm much more cautious now. One of the things I learned is to avoid older chicks. If that means I might miss out on a 30 year old who is great, so be it; I'm not going to do that to myself ever again.
I find this a little stereotypical. There are many 20 year old young women that want a older guy that has a lot of money, drives a nice car, has no kids etc. They want to impress their friends. They have little to no experience in being in a relationship. They can be about partying with their friends etc.
Now this is a stereotypical of course but it happens just as you might have described the older women wanting what they want. I was like that in my 20's and so were many of my female friends. I'm sure being in your 30's, you look back on your 20's and realized the dumb mistakes you may have made in your relationships but now better now.
As I've gotten older I've been in a serious long term relationship, military, college, bought a house, sold a house, career women etc. The fact that I have experience at 30 is the fact that I know what I want. There are some women in their 20's that know what they want but they haven't experienced enough to know that they don't know what they want. It comes with trial and error.
The title of this thread is misleading. OP doesn't want a simple "nice guy".
She wants a nice guy with a laundry list of other credentials. (spirituality, professional income, graduate degree, family oriented, monogamous, attractive, intelligent, in good shape, drug and STD free, not previously married and no children and of course, no criminal record or bad credit).
OP there are a ton of nice guys out there, they may have a past or some flaw though. I hope you're faultless yourself to be so picky.
Ever think that the guy that meets all this criteria may not want you because he can do better or his laundry list of credentials for a women is 3X as long as yours?
I have to wonder OP, what exactly do you bring to the table?
Everyone has a right to determine what is best for them. I appreciate your input, but stop with the judgments, because people in glass houses, have absolutely no right to throw stones.
Yes, I'm 34 and single; however, I've achieved a great deal thus far. I won't go into detail, because I don't want be viewed as boasting, but just know that there's a reason why I didn't have a lot of free time on my hands in college and grad school.
You're correct! I am in the DC metro area, and I work long hours usually, but I'm in the process of revamping my schedule, to ensure that I have time for social activities. Other than my current work schedule, my biggest problem is, I am a bit shy around men, since I do not have vast experience dating.
I do not think it has anything to do with my looks. I am not stating that I'm a perfect 10, but I'm often told that I'm cute, so perhaps I'm closer to the 7/8 range. Anyhow, I have a lot of great attributes that in truth, many other single women (in this area, do not seem to have). For starters, I'm not promiscuous and I live a relatively drama/stress free lifestyle. Also, I'm not in need of a guy's monetary support, since I make more or just as much as many of the professional men in the D.C. metro area.
I do however require that the guy be a professional and have a similar income level. That's highly important to me, along with the other things mentioned in my original post. I am not being too picky, because again, I'm not asking for anything that I do not have.
WOW. Now he's gotta make the same salary? I make a heck of a lot more than my husband does. We don't care who brings home the money or how much. OP, you're looking for a clone of yourself. I think it's your attitude and this long laundry list of requirements that is making it difficult to find "a nice guy".
Everyone has a right to determine what is best for them. I appreciate your input, but stop with the judgments, because people in glass houses, have absolutely no right to throw stones.
Yes, I'm 34 and single; however, I've achieved a great deal thus far. I won't go into detail, because I don't want be viewed as boasting, but just know that there's a reason why I didn't have a lot of free time on my hands in college and grad school.
I am 25 and in grad school and have a great career for someone my age (I will also be done by 27). I also manage to date and I date people I have chemistry with, not men based on their degrees or earning potential. Men I have genuine feelings for.
And no offense but women with degrees out the ying yang and high-paying corp jobs are a dime a dozen in DC. Trust me I know plenty. What ELSE are you bringing to the table?
Last edited by findly185; 05-16-2012 at 01:35 PM..
Everyone has a right to determine what is best for them. I appreciate your input, but stop with the judgments, because people in glass houses, have absolutely no right to throw stones.
Yes, I'm 34 and single; however, I've achieved a great deal thus far. I won't go into detail, because I don't want be viewed as boasting, but just know that there's a reason why I didn't have a lot of free time on my hands in college and grad school.
What about a guy that has ambitious? Maybe he isn't on your level financially or education wise. But a guy with ambition is one of the best personality traits women can go after. Not only is he determined in his professional life but his personal life as well. I find that ambitious guys will do anything to make their women happy. That's the key to happiness.
Women in their thirties dating (decent) men in their thirties shouldn't consider women in their 20's (me) as their competition. I want men in their 20's not men in their 30's. Actually, I know all of the attractive (half-way intelligent) women in my life who are 20-something dont want anything to do with older men. Not saying they aren't all over the place, but young attractive females ( I know) dont want 30-somethings.
It is a common delusion among certain types of men that hot, young 22-year-old women will fall all over themselves to be with a 35-year-old man who, regardless of the "great shape" he currently thinks he's in, has a softer everything than his hot, young, 22-year-old brother.
Being that I'm 45, and therefore know what men in their 30s and 40s are like because I've traveled the road right along with them, unless one is a juicehead bodybuilder--in which case his hot dog is going to be a gherkin and his balls will be marbles--their bodies age just like every other human being's does.
I thought that I was doing everything right by primarily focusing on my education and career, but apparently, I should have also focused on finding Mr. Right.
I'm now a professional 34 year old woman, (although I look closer to 26 in age) who hasn't really dated or had any relationships. I'm curious as to how I should go about finding a future husband, since I am very much interested in having a family.
I don't want to be viewed as desperate, but it's imperative that I find Mr. Right, very soon. I have thought about the online dating thing, but a part of me wants to do it the old fashioned way.
I do not believe my standards are too high, since everything that I ask for, I have myself (i.e. spirituality, professional income, graduate degree, family oriented, monogamous, attractive, intelligent, in good shape, drug and STD free, not previously married and no children and of course, no criminal record or bad credit).
Anyhow, I'm looking for suggestions regarding where I can find Mr. Right.
hmm.. you probably left "Mr. Right" back in your 20's.
i'm sure you can find a Niceguy, though. Maybe he'll even overlook your lies about your age!
It's fine to have standards, but there's a chance that your "Mr Right on paper" wants to be with a woman who has some experience with being in a relationship and isn't just looking for cardboard cutout with the "right" qualifications and usable sperm.
It's gonna be tough to find all that, esp the 100K and grad degree part. Don't complain X years later if you can't find someone, but you are entitled to your preferences, just realize what you are up against. And what is this "I was busy with my career and education". Lots of women have that and manage to find a guy. What, you can't chew gum and walk at the same time?
I do not believe my standards are too high, since everything that I ask for, I have myself (i.e. spirituality, professional income, graduate degree, family oriented, monogamous, attractive, intelligent, in good shape, drug and STD free, not previously married and no children and of course, no criminal record or bad credit).
Your list is kind of picky. Why do they have to have a graduate degree? There are plenty of people that are successful with a Bachelors degree or no degree at all. You are going to eliminate a LOT of quality men with this requirement.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AppleSpice22304
Yes, but my age is not really an issue, since I'm constantly told that I look like I'm only in my mid 20s. FYI: I'm mostly interested in men that are in the 30-38 age range.
Your age IS an issue, and this is coming from a 38yr old woman. Men who want a family are going to absolutely consider your age. You are 34...so date for 2yrs or so, get married and settle down as a couple for a year or so, now you are 37. That's not exactly prime time to start a family. Any guy that dates you is going to feel rushed if he wants to start a family. You are considered "advanced maternal age" after 35yrs and face increase risks and health issues that many younger women won't. Yes, women have done it and have so successfully, but your age is definitely a factor in this.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
