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Confidence=knowing you're the ****. Arrogance=openly saying you're the ****. A very fine line to walk, but if u master it, you can have a whole lot of fun. Swagger is everything in being a man. Wish I would have developed it sooner, but better late than never
i think u came near it a few time in your OP.
low self esteem and self doubt are skunk juice to women.
but important to remember that questioning yourself develops character. low self esteem is not adjustable. but just because the choir in your head tells you, you are junk, does not mean u are.
it is what we do that makes us who we are not our opinion about ourselves.
no better illustrated than in the film, beautiful mind. dont listen to the choir in your head.
also hooking up is not the meaning of life. if women like bragging boastful hot air balloon ego maniacs, and shun men that think b4 they talk and are modest in what they have to say, but great in what they do, let them. you dont need them. a world of women out there chasing big mouth wana be bad boys. pretty fools are a dime a dozen.
If you are able to not think about these types of things, I suppose thats good, for you. Myself on the other hand, I think about them a lot. Lately I have been going through spells of depression, to the point where I just wanna lounge around all day and do nothing but have a pitty party for myself. I'm coming to the realization that that isn't doing anything to improve the things I'm depressed about.
And, I don't believe that you don't think about them, for the simple fact that you are here talking about the troubles you've had in relationships. You must think about them and they must weigh heavily on you. If you don't think about them, maybe you should, and then think of ways and strategies you can improve your situation.
As far as elevating to a higher existence? Maybe it doesn't seem to you like they have, but it seems to me that a lot of it is in how YOU percieve your own existence. Are YOU happy with the way things are in your life? Thats all that really counts.
So Something we here a lot of is that you have to have "confidence" to have any success with woman. Now until recently, I thought that just meant that you had to be not so afraid to go up and approach women and be able to talk with them without being really shy and timid, but now I "think" I am beginning to understand the whole isuue of confidence, and how you can achieve it a little better. Burgler09 has really helped to put this in perspective for me, so thanks, along with other posters whos opinion I value.
So guys, what is self confidence, and how exactly does one achieve it? Here is what I am beginning to understand and grasp:
Confidence isn't just being at ease with the opposite sex, it's so much more. Sure, that's a part of it, but confidence is more of a mentality. It's in how you value your own self and your opinions, your skills and your talents. It's in your attitude towards yourself and towards others. It's how you carry yourself, how you talk, how you walk, and how you view your past experinces and whether you are enjoying your current ones. It's whether you are content with your lifestyle and how you are living it. It's measured in your success in relationships, both intimate and non, and how the participants in those relationships view you as a person.
Basically, if you are not happy with your current situation in life, this is going to affect your confidence level. If you have no confidence, I take that to mean that you have to do whatever it takes to improve it in order to gain confidence. Confidence isn't something that can be forced or faked, and it isn't something that is temporarily there long enough for you to approach a potential date. It's something that comes naturaly, and is just there. You either have it, or you don't. You can't force it, and you can't fake it.
So am I on the right track to discovering the true meaning of confidence?
I don't know where you get that life "should" be an amazing experience. Based on what other people's amazing experiences in their lives? If you do not like the way your life is going everyone wants to shove down your throat the idea of 'presto, chango!' your life can be different "oh, you just don't try and don't want it to be." They have the answers for every damn body's situation. Personally I got sick of hearing that crap they were basing off of their OWN lives. Now I just don't care what happens next and will be glad when this ride from hell comes to an end.
Anyway, how do you know your life 'should' be a certain way and 'shouldn't be the way it is?
Clearly this forum is a haven for seriously troubled individuals. I don't know how such people even get up and get dressed in the morning. Doll, your perspective is so negative and so unpleasant that I cannot imagine you having many friends in your life. You must have had a horrible childhood. Sorry, girl.
Ya gotta like the WhipperSnapper. He's smart, sincere, honest, and he tries. And gets it right. But I'd pass on the "swagger", if I were you, Whipp. You don't want to overdo the confidence thing. Fine line, as someone already said.
Clearly this forum is a haven for seriously troubled individuals. I don't know how such people even get up and get dressed in the morning. Doll, your perspective is so negative and so unpleasant that I cannot imagine you having many friends in your life. You must have had a horrible childhood. Sorry, girl.
I just heard on the radio today that people who have a constant negative outlook on life die much sooner than the eternal optimists, sometimes as much as 43% sooner.
Ya gotta like the WhipperSnapper. He's smart, sincere, honest, and he tries. And gets it right. But I'd pass on the "swagger", if I were you, Whipp. You don't want to overdo the confidence thing. Fine line, as someone already said.
Yeah he's a pretty good guy
Skip on the swag though. Swag really isn't worth the effort to obtain.
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But I'd pass on the "swagger", if I were you, Whipp. You don't want to overdo the confidence thing. Fine line, as someone already said.
