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Of course it shouldn't, but I am not sure about the "so often" part. As you said, women enjoy sex as much as men do. It's not something we reluctantly give up only to control men.
Agreed.
Yet you seem to believe that women generally use sex as a weapon and that we are naturally manipulative and cunning because we are female. This is what I meant by being in tune with women far more than I am. Like I said, it's possible. I can't prove that I understand women better than you do.
Understanding why these inhibitions exist will help eliminate them. I told you what I thought was a normal and reasonable explanation why women might choose to be cautious; you believe instead that we do so to ensnare and manipulate men, or at least the ones who fall for it. Unless I misunderstand?
I think it happens quite often, that sex is used in a reward/penalty manner. You know, like the husband being in the doghouse and sleeping on the couch for a weekend or getting laid, when he buys the wife a nice gift or does something for her. Those seem to be socialy accepted outcomes, but i disagree with them. I know this isnt going to be popular with you or any other feamle, and that my views and ideas very rarely fit into any accepted form, but yes - i do indeed believe that women are nautraly manipulative and cunning. Women live in the world of seemingly endless details, which they masterfuly manipulate to their benefits and means. Details, men have no idea even exist. I dont hold this against women per se, as i understand it is highly unconscious and not pre-meditated in the least, in fact i love ALL women for how they are and wouldnt change a thing about them. I think it is simply an outcome of living in todays western society, and people falling into uniformity of mind, popular views and socialy accepted norms.
I think it happens quite often, that sex is used in a reward/penalty manner. You know, like the husband being in the doghouse and sleeping on the couch for a weekend or getting laid, when he buys the wife a nice gift or does something for her. Those seem to be socialy accepted outcomes, but i disagree with them. I know this isnt going to be popular with you or any other feamle, and that my views and ideas very rarely fit into any accepted form, but yes - i do indeed believe that women are nautraly manipulative and cunning. Women live in the world of seemingly endless details, which they masterfuly manipulate to their benefits and means. Details, men have no idea even exist. I dont hold this against women per se, as i understand it is highly unconscious and not pre-meditated in the least, in fact i love ALL women for how they are and wouldnt change a thing about them. I think it is simply an outcome of living in todays western society, and people falling into uniformity of mind, popular views and socialy accepted norms.
You claim to love women yet you automatically ascribe some very nasty character traits to them as inherent. Sorry, I don't buy the "love women" part, then. If anything, it sounds like you might be part of the movement described in #3 here.
As for "using" sex, we could flip this around and say that men have a skewed sense of entitlement. Although booting a man to the couch is a bit much, it is absolutely ridiculous for a man, even a married one, to behave badly or treat his partner poorly and then expect her to spread her legs for him that night even if she's angry or upset with him. You see pushing a man away after he has been an ahole to be manipulative. I see it as a woman simply being turned off. It would be like if your wife or girlfriend smelled bad, started picking her nose in front of you, vomited on you, or used the bed as a toilet. Bad behavior on the part of men repulses women sexually. It disgusts us. Oh well!
You claim to love women yet you automatically ascribe some very nasty character traits to them as inherent. Sorry, I don't buy the "love women" part, then. If anything, it sounds like you might be part of the movement described in #3 here.
As for "using" sex, we could flip this around and say that men have a skewed sense of entitlement. Although booting a man to the couch is a bit much, it is absolutely ridiculous for a man, even a married one, to behave badly or treat his partner poorly and then expect her to spread her legs for him that night even if she's angry or upset with him. You see pushing a man away after he has been an ahole to be manipulative. I see it as a woman simply being turned off. It would be like if your wife or girlfriend smelled bad, started picking her nose in front of you, vomited on you, or used the bed as a toilet. Bad behavior on the part of men repulses women sexually. It disgusts us. Oh well!
I really couldnt care less about your link, or what type of movement you thnk i belong to ...(LMAO - give me a break from nonsense please). I love all women, and if you dont agree, thats quite ok. Both genders can and do behave badly, yet men never really withhold sex as the consequence. This is why, I say its being used as a reward/penalty type of act, which i find repulsive. Im not taking sides, nor gender bashing, just stating reality as i see it and sharing my view. So next time you send your man to sleep on the couch, remind yourself that he is a human being not Pavlov's dog.
I really couldnt care less about your link, or what type of movement you thnk i belong to ...(LMAO - give me a break from nonsense please). I love all women, and if you dont agree, thats quite ok. Both genders can and do behave badly, yet men never really withhold sex as the consequence. This is why, I say its being used as a reward/penalty type of act, which i find repulsive. Im not taking sides, nor gender bashing, just stating reality as i see it and sharing my view. So next time you send your man to sleep on the couch, remind yourself that he is a human being not Pavlov's dog.
Here's what you seem to be missing. Maybe many men can have sex with someone that they are really angry with. Maybe they can separate themselves from their emotions and still do the deed. I can't speak for all women but I am not able to do this. If I am mad at my husband - I will not be having sex with him. This isn't a punishment. I'm not being manipulative. I do not want to have sex with someone when I am angry at them. My husband has never slept on the couch and we try not to go to bed angry but if I am angry with him - we will not be having sex. Also, if I'm exhausted or if I'm really upset about something - say, if someone died for instance - I am not going to be in the mood. This is not my "inherent female manipulative nature." This is me not being able to turn off who I am to partake in sexual activity.
Yes. I've been asked out. By my 3 major categories of deal breakers: a) ethnicities that I'm not attracted to, b) some weight issues, and c) "punch in the arm, let's get a beer" type girls. I usually already know them through some venue, so I go but make sure my mood and vibe is perfunctory. Eventually, they "get it" and stop asking me out. Sometimes the friendship continues and sometimes it doesn't.
I really couldnt care less about your link, or what type of movement you thnk i belong to ...(LMAO - give me a break from nonsense please). I love all women, and if you dont agree, thats quite ok. Both genders can and do behave badly, yet men never really withhold sex as the consequence. This is why, I say its being used as a reward/penalty type of act, which i find repulsive. Im not taking sides, nor gender bashing, just stating reality as i see it and sharing my view. So next time you send your man to sleep on the couch, remind yourself that he is a human being not Pavlov's dog.
And next time you find a woman repulsive for not having sex with you, remind yourself she's a human being, not your sex slave.
Both genders can and do behave badly, yet men never really withhold sex as the consequence. This is why, I say its being used as a reward/penalty type of act, which i find repulsive. Im not taking sides, nor gender bashing, just stating reality as i see it and sharing my view. So next time you send your man to sleep on the couch, remind yourself that he is a human being not Pavlov's dog.
Okay, I see what you are saying, but some men do use sex as a different type of weapon. And for every wife who makes her husband sleep on the couch, I expect there's a husband somewhere who doesn't know or care if his wife enjoys herself.
Not once in over 16 years have I kicked my husband out of bed.
How can a married man use sex as a weapon? A husband telling his wife “Ok, from here on, no more sex unless you…” will probably get laughed at.
I know I'm in the minority but I can use it as a weapon as she has higher sex drive than me. I rather get stuff done in my work life, work around the place or work on my cars than to have sex.
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