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I have a feeling a lot of will men read the second sentence of the title of this post and say, "no, we can't." The argument goes that you cannot control you feel attracted to, that being drawn to beauty is just a basic biological response. Besides, why bother trying to have a relationship with someone you're not attracted to?
I agree, up to a point. I agree we really have no control over who we find beautiful. And I agree, attraction to beauty probably has a strong biological component. But that is not really the question I am asking.
My question is whether we sometimes give too much weight to beauty relative to other factors. Many men will quickly reject a smart, warm, charming, witty, supportive, compassionate women just because she isn't beautiful. However, I am amazed at how many men will put up with a dumb, cold, crass, vapid, selfish, cruel woman just because she is beautiful.
Being drawn to beauty may be biological. But placing beauty above all other values in choosing a partner seems more a learned behavior. And maybe, a behavior we should try to unlearn.
No man has ever got a boner because a girl had a nice degree or because she is "witty." Just saying. If the man can't get it up for the girl, it's best for both parties not to date each other.
I don't know. I think that we are all responsible for our own choices. We may not be able to control who we find attractive - but you can control if you choose to enter into a relationship with a psycho because she's a hottie. So it may not be a choice in who you are attracted to - but it certainly is a choice if you get involved with someone.
Smart men realize that if they're always ending up with shallow women, they need to start making different choices. They start looking for personality more than looks. Men have married women who they weren't interested in for their looks at first, but found the kind of personality they'd been searching for. Their whole perspective changed, and the attraction grew.
I don't think it's learned, I think it's natural or biological as you call it. Remember that men have to get an erection in order to have sex. Women do not need to do this in order to have sex.
I don't think it's learned, I think it's natural or biological as you call it. Remember that men have to get an erection in order to have sex. Women do not need to do this in order to have sex.
Obviously women do not get erections, but they do need to feel attraction. On a crude, physiological level, if women don't lubricate, sex can be painful and unpleasant for them.
Obviously women do not get erections, but they do need to feel attraction. On a crude, physiological level, if women don't lubricate, sex can be painful and unpleasant for them.
True but she can still do it and still do it if she's only partially aroused. A man must be aroused without question.
I don't think it's learned, I think it's natural or biological as you call it. Remember that men have to get an erection in order to have sex. Women do not need to do this in order to have sex.
Most men can get aroused...even if the woman is not a Playboy model...and if he can't, there may be other psychological issues going on...
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