I hate texting in dating sometimes! (men, family, kids, divorce)

[The Dissenter]

Originally Posted by burgler09

I don't call people when I date. I talk in person or text. I don't have any social problems, nor do I have a fear of talking on the phone.


Has nothing to do with being a man, having no fear or social skills. Some people simply hate talking on the phone.

And some spend up to 8 hours a day on the phone at work and the last thing they want to do is even look at a phone once they punch out. My mouth is tired from talking business and sales at the end of the day. I should not be judged if I prefer to text or message a girl rather to pick up the phone and talk to them.

[useasdirected]

Originally Posted by kimbo28

I have a texting story.

A guy I've hung out with once texted me last night to see if I wanted to hang out this week. He then proceeded to tell me that he had been through my hometown on the weekend and sent me a laundry list of complaints about what he observed and disliked about it. It really pissed me off. Not only do I have hometown pride - I mean, I spent 25 years there - why the hell are you complaining to me about things like the city layout and the landscape? That can't be helped. And it's a strange thing to complain about via text, especially to someone you've met once. I mean, I know the city has faults and what not but couldn't that be an in-person discussion topic? I'm not sure if I should write him off just yet but it definitely soured me on the whole thing.

Did you ask him if he wanted you to single-handedly repaint and rebuild the area?

[useasdirected]

Originally Posted by cpg35223

Texting is great for messages that are completely without nuance:

-- Hey, our reservations at the restaurant are at 7:30, not 7:00.
-- Pick up milk on the way home.
-- I'm in a meeting. Let me call in an hour.
-- What do you think of this jacket [Photo of said jacket]

However, their usefulness tends to fall off when it comes to anything beyond the straightforward mechanics of communicating information. It's slow, it's cumbersome and, most of the time, it's hard to divine the emotions that drive the words. In that sense, texting as their main form of communication is for people who are the social equivalent of thalidomide children.

I mean, how hard is it to just dial the number? The phone is in your hand already.

Exactly. Considering that you push the buttons more in texting, but with a phone call you're dialing at most 11 digits (calling nationally and dialing outside the area code).

[oceangaia]

Originally Posted by useasdirected

Exactly. Considering that you push the buttons more in texting, but with a phone call you're dialing at most 11 digits (calling nationally and dialing outside the area code).

And yet people complain that texting is lazy!

But wait, people dial numbers? I thought they put them in once and then just press the button in Contacts.

Of course, there are also apps and features that let you dictate and convert to text (hello Siri) or even just send a voice note.

[ATG5]

Originally Posted by reed067

I'm betting your still single. Right?

I'm single.

So go 'head and say that's the reason I'm single.

[Frihed89]

I have never talked with a romantic partner over the internet or SMS. It's lazy; it's impersonal; and it's virtually free and nothing ain't worth nothing unless it's free. Ask any woman here what it means to get a real love letter in the mail, or hear a real person over the phone, or better yet be engaged a spur of the moment conversation over a cup of coffee.

Try this:

"Hi, it's [your name], how about us going out for a cup of coffee in an hour, so I can tell you... how beautiful you are?"

[intelfan11315]

Originally Posted by reed067

I'm betting your still single. Right?

I have a girlfriend brotha.

How'd yours go?



No need to take jabs at me when I was simply stating that I prefer texting that that it has nothing to do with being a man. Some people prefer texting and they're merely saying that it's really normal for them.

[sportsfangal]

I can't stand it when guys text all the time! They write these long messages and I'm like, dude, just call me! It is very lazy, and makes it so easy to flake on dates! My sister says to tell a guy that I don't have unlimited texts and not to text me that often. So, I'll try that sometime soon! (we'll see if they get the hint that that means to call instead!)

Originally Posted by strawberrykiki

I've always loved texting. It's a great way for me to chit chat with friends when I'm at work and can't talk, to tell someone I'm thinking of them, let someone know I'm running late, etc., but texting in dating is really starting to annoy me.

Why do people think that texting as the main form of communication is okay? I really don't enjoy talking on the phone, but I think it's a nice gesture to actually call someone sometimes and inquire about their day instead of always sending a text. Or if a guy wants to make a date why doesn't he call and ask? It's always done via texting. And of course if he doesn't answer right away or if I don't answer right away then you wonder what's going on because now with smart phones people are supposed to be immediately available at all times.

I think texting is lazy. I was dating a guy who made effort to call at the beginning, but now I've seen him once in a month. He makes zero effort to get in touch, but every few days I'll get a text of something like hey how was your day. Is there any lazier way to try to keep someone on the hook? I've noticed it a lot in dating. I feel like the best guys I've met from online and the ones that were the most sincere were those who made effort to actually call and chat with me for a little bit and make plans over the phone versus sending a damn text.

Maybe I'm getting old. I wonder what it would have been like to date back when the only way to get in contact with someone was to wait until they were actually at home and actually speak to them.

[CluelessBabe]

I think that in a relationship when you don't see the person every day that it is important to talk on the phone as opposed to texting because things get misconstrued and easily be misunderstood, etc. Texting can be lazy because making the phone call takes more effort and time on the persons part.

They do things like to keep them on the hook because once you are like forget this guy and are about to delete his number. . .oh here comes the text

[Nycdb]

I'm a woman that hates, despises, detests, abhors conversational texting. I love constant texting about as much as as I love being punched in the face. I don't like the ping-pong exchange of being tethered to my phone.

I hate those that try to guilt you into appeasing their constant neediness of remaining in touch via text. Those that do are needy and need something to keep them mentally stimulated outside of being a chronic texter.

I wish they'd take some social cues - such as if they're always the iniator of most texting situations most of the time. If someone wants to contact you, they will.

I don't mind texting on a forum such as this, because I'm not tethered to be obligated to nonstop texting or having to reply at some point. I don't like predating texting either. I don't want to be responsive to a guy until I know that I like him.

So there is a very small minority of us women that don't want to be tied to our phones all day or night. I know it's preference, but I think too much texting kills a connection, especially in potential dating situations - less is more guys. Air on the side of quality as far as "just wanted to day hello, thinking about you, have a good day." Not the "hi, wyd, hmu, pic?"

I've cut things off with a guy that I was newly dating, because his main point of communication was texting. We had decent chemistry in person and had gone out three times, but I felt the only way I'd get to know him is when we could be in person, because I refuse to be a chronic phone texter. Not to mention he texted one day saying he was out my way and I wasn't sure what I was supposed to text. Needless to say after that I cut things off with him.

I refuse to conform and don't feel the need to. I see some females having meltdowns over text and I think they're complete idiots. You can convey a lot in a two minute conversation versus a nonstop texting exchange. I wish more people got it. I set the rules from the beginning with guys that I am not into texting and if they break the rules I block them, period.