Is it strange to want to be single forever? (cheating, young, advice)
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My mother probably thought like that one day. It changed overnight.
So? Just because it happened to your mother doesn't mean it happens to EVERYONE. That never happened to my mother. It also didn't happen to many, many other people that I know. Look - don't get married. Don't ever have a relationship. Don't date. Just be happy and let others be happy. That's what happy people do.
It's only strange if your doing it because of circumstances outside of personal choice.
In other words, its a weak a** excuse to use your parents relationship, an ex relationship, your friends relationship, past or future fear to justify it.
The ONLY way for that decision to be justifiable is if you are making it based on the simple fact that you prefer to be alone, not attached to another individual.
It's only strange if your doing it because of circumstances outside of personal choice.
In other words, its a weak a** excuse to use your parents relationship, an ex relationship, your friends relationship, past or future fear to justify it.
The ONLY way for that decision to be justifiable is if you are making it based on the simple fact that you prefer to be alone, not attached to another individual.
^^^. To add to it, most rational people would make this decision based on their own personal experiences, not the experiences of others. I don't think there are that many people who truly want no companionship in life, but you often hear of someone becoming jaded or cynical based on their own personal (bad) experiences or choices. That makes sense to me. It doesn't make sense to have not yet had any life experiences, and opt to be single based on fear.
I badmouth marriage the same way I'd badmouth war. If it's bad, it's bad.
Your parents sound identical to mine. I have a big family, and their marriages definitely looks like war. They openly state how they regret being married and that "love" is bullcrap. All my aunties, uncles, grandparents say it too, and they're 50yrs old and above. They have the experience, so they must obviously know what they're talking about. I enjoy my short term relationships with women but I''d never even think about getting married or letting her move in. It's not for me. I've seen enough of it to know I'll never do it.
There's nothing wrong with wanting to be single. Stay single if you makes you happy and don't ever feel pressurized into doing something because everyone else is.
So? Just because it happened to your mother doesn't mean it happens to EVERYONE. That never happened to my mother. It also didn't happen to many, many other people that I know. Look - don't get married. Don't ever have a relationship. Don't date. Just be happy and let others be happy. That's what happy people do.
Still, marriage's sucess rate is very low in the long term and keeps decreasing. There's no way to deny it.
Still, marriage's sucess rate is very low in the long term and keeps decreasing. There's no way to deny it.
Actually, there are no accurate statistics for the divorce rate. Someone explained this on another thread - but most truthful sites will also spell that out. Divorce also varies by class, education, 1st marriage vs. 2nd marriage, etc. There haven't been any studies done that follow the same group of newlyweds for years and years - which would really be the only accurate way to see any sort of data for a divorce rate.
But it seems that you will only see what you want to see - which is the marriage of your parents. And if you want to let other people's lives dictate how you live yours - you have the right to do so. Nobody is stopping you. If you are happy that's all that matters. But you don't seem very happy to me - but I don't know you so who am I to judge.
So? Just because it happened to your mother doesn't mean it happens to EVERYONE. That never happened to my mother. It also didn't happen to many, many other people that I know. Look - don't get married. Don't ever have a relationship. Don't date. Just be happy and let others be happy. That's what happy people do.
THIS. ^^^^^
JayN, I sense conflict in you. If you were secure in your decisions, you wouldn't be asking the question of whether it's strange, nor would you be so aggressively negative, or even concerned, with what other people do.
Believe me, I can see why some folks don't want marriage. I don't particularly want it myself. And, to crack a joke, if I took these boards to be representative of the human race, not only would I never want to marry, I'd never want to date and I'd probably want to wall myself up in a compound in rural Iowa or something.
But I'm not going to sit there and say that an entire way of life is wrong. I don't want kids, but that doesn't mean kids and parents are evil. Same thing.
Just live your life and focus on what you want to do. You'll probably be much happier that way.
^^^. To add to it, most rational people would make this decision based on their own personal experiences, not the experiences of others. I don't think there are that many people who truly want no companionship in life, but you often hear of someone becoming jaded or cynical based on their own personal (bad) experiences or choices. That makes sense to me. It doesn't make sense to have not yet had any life experiences, and opt to be single based on fear.
I don't have to climb Mount Everest to know I wouldn't be able to do it.
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