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I know three couples who are now married who met on eHarmony 5 years ago. It seems like it worked better for people then than it does now based on conversations I've had with my friends and acquaintances-at least that seems to be the case in this area. I was recently told I needed to try it again and give it at least a year if I wanted any chance of it being successful.
Interesting. I find it to be every bit as good as it was 5 years ago, and possibly even better. I wonder if that's a male/female difference, a geographic difference, or just a personal difference.
Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve
I signed up at match.com, paid about $100 for 6 months and regretted it 2 days later. Wanted to cancel, but it wasn't possible.
With any dating site, if they're not giving a free trial, I would recommend signing up for the shortest amount of time possible to see if you like it first. Then, if you like it, go for one of the longer time periods to get the better monthly rate.
I signed up at match.com, paid about $100 for 6 months and regretted it 2 days later. Wanted to cancel, but it wasn't possible.
I sent emails to about 50 guys and had either no responses or they stopped writing after 2 short emails back and forth.
I have received alot of emails though from guys that I would never date (much shorter than me, much younger or very much older, quasimodos).
Fazit: I thought if I stay on that page any longer, I get very depressed and insecure. Insecure because the guys that I find compatible dont want me and no - I am not looking above my league. I contacted those kind of guys who I dated in the past. Also insecurities started because quasimodos think I am in their league.
I found it interesting that most acceptable looking guys my age (36-40) are looking for girls TO MARRY in the age group 21-34. What does a 40 year old want with a 21 year old??
That's around my age group too (I am 41)and yes I have seen that. I have had men tell me I was hot but if I was younger they'd consider me. They use the kids excuse but there is never a guarantee they can, a younger girl can or I can't. Besides, if they were that into having kids why didn't they look years ago?
Your post sounds EXACTLY like my experience and it was so frustrating being contacted by men I have zero interest in and like you I was contacting men at my league.
Interesting. Maybe that was just how it worked way back in 2000. I can imagine in the earlier days of online dating the sites attracted a lot of awkward men and not a lot of women who wanted to date them, so they had to provide incentive. Now that it's a pretty mainstream way of meeting dates for both men and women (and has been since at least 2006), they haven't needed to do that.
I believe back then they did and so getting women was important. I know back in the 90's women were getting cheap or free ads for dating ads like on phone, in the paper etc.
I don't think there's anything wrong with not wanting to date men with kids. I don't date men with kids either, but I don't say never...if I met the right guy I might be willing to compromise. The point I was making is you don't mention anything else in your dating criteria. It seems like you don't care about personality or looks or anything but that they are never married with no kids.
Everything else is important but I look at this upfront before anything else.
Well in my case none of the women I met from the sites have worked out. And I think thats the reason I closed my account(s). It seems like when I start liking a woman I put fourth more effort into getting to know her ect.... And if things ended on her end it didnt matter because she has 6 other guys lined up.
From the person who said I was wrong because I don't date dads.
I don't knock you for that at all. I come from a European background and also am Catholic ... Nuclear family is a very strong tradition. Blended families? Not here.
I just don't get you. You act like that's the only thing that matters in finding a relationship.
I just stumbled onto this thread through Google, but from my traditional European Catholic's background, it is ALL about family and that means YOUR OWN family. I don't think the instant family thing works for someone who hasn't married and doesn't have kids of their own. I think it might be different if you've been married and have your own set of kids and are meeting someone with their kids ... but I probably wouldn't do that either.
I am trying to find someone to share my life with, that would enhance me, not change me. Someone to do the day to day. I miss being married and have been single long enough. Time to get back to serious relationship of two people working together on things.
I am finding that most of the god sites charge a good amount if you want to join and even more if you want to do it for only 1 month.
I am thinking I have to pay to even look at who may be interested in some internet flirting or chatting first, not even more serious exchanges of numbers etc.
Has anyone used any of the pay sites and what is your response to them.
I haven't paid to any yet as I want to find out just how much of a scam they really are or if indeed they do work and you do meet some good people.
Thanks for advice. I will be waiting for the posts just like the soulmate.
I am currently using a paid dating site, but I plan to cancel my subscription. I no longer wish to be apart of the "online" dating game. I prefer to use my college and graduate school based alumni association gatherings and meet-up groups within my local area.
I just stumbled onto this thread through Google, but from my traditional European Catholic's background, it is ALL about family and that means YOUR OWN family. I don't think the instant family thing works for someone who hasn't married and doesn't have kids of their own. I think it might be different if you've been married and have your own set of kids and are meeting someone with their kids ... but I probably wouldn't do that either.
No it doesn't and why they think it would is beyond me. I was talking to a few people last night (mostly divorced people with kids)and all of them were discussing their ex and the ex's new spouse and the drama they have. There is no way I would put myself in that drama.
No it doesn't and why they think it would is beyond me. I was talking to a few people last night (mostly divorced people with kids)and all of them were discussing their ex and the ex's new spouse and the drama they have. There is no way I would put myself in that drama.
Drama is also an issue not to be taken lightly, but I am approaching this more from the angle of having a strong family bond ... meaning kids that are your own. I believe in that. The Roman Catholic church has a more legalistic way of looking at things than the Eastern Orthodox (Catholic) churches, but even there divorce is frowned upon and people pretty much toe the line. In my way of looking at things this has more to do with the strong family bond and the notion that children should be put on a pedestal, not to mention that financially it's also a smart thing to do. Single parents are simply never going to get ahead financially in most cases.
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