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I hate talking on the phone. I do appreciate when a guy calls to make plans because it's easier to have a back and forth about what days work, where to go, and what time than trading texts, but I've never been one to chat on the phone for hours. Just because he's not a phone person doesn't mean you guys won't hit it off if you meet in person. Why don't you just say hey I'd really appreciate you giving me a call so we can make some plans and see if he makes the effort to call. He may not know how much value you place on phone conversations.
If someone doesn't follow through, particularly at the beginning, it's time to move on.
He said he'd call and didn't. He texts sporadically. Looks like he wants to do things on his terms, with a total disregard of your preferences and time.
He may be texting several girls at once. He may be committed and can't follow through because he's in someone else's presence. Too much work to play the guessing game with someone in the early stage of getting to know them.
Do yourself a favor and move on to someone who has their act together.
I think the basic "get to know you" info should be disseminated in a series of 3-4 emails on the dating site, then any further getting to know each other should be done in person.
The phone should be used in the interim to trade a few mindless flirty texts and to make plans, but nothing more.
Like I said in my last post, technology shouldn't be used to replace the fundamentals of dating.
Then don't do the emails or texts either, except to ask for the date and arrange the time and place. Nothing more. I also don't feel that emails or texts should take the place of connecting with someone. If you want to throw talking on phone in there too, that's fine, but what I object to is taking out the phone talking but substituting it with texts or emails.
Then don't do the emails or texts either, except to ask for the date and arrange the time and place. Nothing more. I also don't feel that emails or texts should take the place of connecting with someone. If you want to throw talking on phone in there too, that's fine, but what I object to is taking out the phone talking but substituting it with texts or emails.
Emails are a necessary evil in online dating, because that's how you initiate contact. If you were on a dating site, and some dude just messaged you with a phone number and nothing else, I'm guessing you would not call.
Texting before meeting is really optional, but as I mentioned before, if you do it you should limit it to mindless stuff. It shouldn't be used to get to know the other person and therefore it isn't a "substitute" for phone or in-person contact.
Emails are a necessary evil in online dating, because that's how you initiate contact. If you were on a dating site, and some dude just messaged you with a phone number and nothing else, I'm guessing you would not call.
So you acknowledge that some women do need to be warmed up some?
It is true.
Some like emailing a lot, some like texting a lot, some need the phone conversation and some need just a time and a place to meet and get the ball rolling.
If a guy was like a 10 and he just messaged me his number, I might in fact call (would be hard to resist), but then my expectations would be even higher about the connecting we do in person.
But yeah, lots of people people want to take more indirect routes.
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Texting before meeting is really optional, but as I mentioned before, if you do it you should limit it to mindless stuff. It shouldn't be used to get to know the other person and therefore it isn't a "substitute" for phone or in-person contact.
I hate talking on the phone. I do appreciate when a guy calls to make plans because it's easier to have a back and forth about what days work, where to go, and what time than trading texts, but I've never been one to chat on the phone for hours. Just because he's not a phone person doesn't mean you guys won't hit it off if you meet in person. Why don't you just say hey I'd really appreciate you giving me a call so we can make some plans and see if he makes the effort to call. He may not know how much value you place on phone conversations.
Sometimes the guy doesn't want to do everything and wants to see/hear the initiation from the woman. It shows us that you have a little skin in the game. Tell us you prefer a certain form of communication over another. We will likely never get mad and actually prefer it. Shows me you're interested, want to keep talking, but not with the method we are using.
Dudes don't like talking on the phone. If you meet one who does, he's probably gay.
With that said, endless texting with someone you meet online without ever getting together in person is stupid and a waste of time.
This guy needs to sh%& or get off the commode. Tell him in your next text that he needs to make plans to meet you by this weekend at the latest; otherwise, he can log back into POF and find a new texting buddy, because you've got better things to do.
I know guys like to text. I do too but geez!! I'm not going to keep texting forever. Just wondering if I should say something.
This guy doesn't realize that a) he's actually too busy to date (the most important thing), and b) he needs to call. If he doesn't get it, there's nothing you can do.
If I did online dating I would be okay with this (provided we didn't do in-depth texting or emailing either), but most women are going to want to have a "get to know you" phone conversation before meeting in person.
That's what I told him...he said he understood. He was the one the first night wanting set up a meeting.
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