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Now hear me out. Men(not all)think they are better looking than what they really are. This is why they date up. Women on the other hand tend to think they are not all that. That's why some settle. Do you agree?
Halfway.
Women are told from Day One that it's all about youth and beauty. They are hammered from every available outlet about how wrinkles, gray hair, cellulite, sagging this, blemished that, imperfect the other is basically a kiss of death, and how women's looks and bodies are their commodities to barter with and trade to be successful in love and life. As most women are not pageant queens with perfect skin, hair, or body, it tends to do a number on their view of themselves.
The ironic part is that most men I know don't even want all of that in a woman in the first place. The only men I see harping on how men are attracted to youth and beauty are the handful of sexist loudmouths here on this forum who can't resist an opportunity to try to make either passive-aggressive or overtly hostile swipes at the women here, most of whom have had far more success in love and relationships than those dolts could ever hope to have. I've never heard men yammer on about all of that in real life before. Ever.
As for men thinking they are better looking than they are, that comes back to the messages they receive from every outlet from Day One, especially if they are white. By and large, white men still have advantages that men of color and women at large do not have. Wealth and power are still concentrated in the hands of white men, and they are still raised with the notion that the world is their oyster. Overall and very generally speaking, that instills in them a sense of entitlement that men of color and women at large just do not have. Things are changing, sure, but it's a long, long road. The point is that when you have that kind of entitlement and privilege because of your gender and color, and you're not judged on them, you tend not to worry about your looks and your appearance the way people who are judged on those things do.
I'm sure this will tick off a lot of the people here who see themselves in this, but frankly, I'm past caring.
I admit it...I think I am way better looking than I really am. I wake up thinking thinking I am a stud like Flava Flav...unfortunately I have realized I am not on that level yet
I admit it...I think I am way better looking than I really am. I wake up thinking thinking I am a stud like Flava Flav...unfortunately I have realized I am not on that level yet
Ew gawd not Flava Flave more like Euge Washington.
While I agree to some extent that men are more confident or less harsh on their appearance than women, I do not believe it is the primary reason they desire to 'date up.' Rather, I believe men are conditioned by Hollywood to believe that any man can bag a good looking woman as long as he has the right kind of charm. Leonard from Big Bang theory, George Costanza from Seinfeld, 40 Year Old Virgin, any Kevin James character, etc. You never see teenagers with 2.5 gpa's angsting in the Education forum that they didn't get into an Ivy League school because it's well understood that elite Universities are only for the smartest students. Sadly Hollywood creates an unrealistic portrayal of the world in which ugly men being with beautiful women is far more common than it really is.
Yes. I have seen so many unattractive men complain about not being able to get model beautiful women. I once had a friend get upset with online dating because he wasn't attracting women he felt he deserved. He was very obese (around 400 pounds), about 5'9, smelly, 40, underemployed and lived with his parents. He was looking for a woman around 25 who was around his height or shorter, thin with big boobs and preferably blonde. He turned down a woman who was chubby because she was chubby (though he was obese). Haven't seen him in years but he's either still single and complaining or lowered his standards.
I admit it...I think I am way better looking than I really am. I wake up thinking thinking I am a stud like Flava Flav...unfortunately I have realized I am not on that level yet
Oh, good grief, no. You are much better-looking than he is!
Women are told from Day One that it's all about youth and beauty. They are hammered from every available outlet about how wrinkles, gray hair, cellulite, sagging this, blemished that, imperfect the other is basically a kiss of death, and how women's looks and bodies are their commodities to barter with and trade to be successful in love and life. As most women are not pageant queens with perfect skin, hair, or body, it tends to do a number on their view of themselves.
The ironic part is that most men I know don't even want all of that in a woman in the first place. The only men I see harping on how men are attracted to youth and beauty are the handful of sexist loudmouths here on this forum who can't resist an opportunity to try to make either passive-aggressive or overtly hostile swipes at the women here, most of whom have had far more success in love and relationships than those dolts could ever hope to have. I've never heard men yammer on about all of that in real life before. Ever.
As for men thinking they are better looking than they are, that comes back to the messages they receive from every outlet from Day One, especially if they are white. By and large, white men still have advantages that men of color and women at large do not have. Wealth and power are still concentrated in the hands of white men, and they are still raised with the notion that the world is their oyster. Overall and very generally speaking, that instills in them a sense of entitlement that men of color and women at large just do not have. Things are changing, sure, but it's a long, long road. The point is that when you have that kind of entitlement and privilege because of your gender and color, and you're not judged on them, you tend not to worry about your looks and your appearance the way people who are judged on those things do.
I'm sure this will tick off a lot of the people here who see themselves in this, but frankly, I'm past caring.
White men aren't in power. Heh heh. That's what the other races like them to think. Ever see this?
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