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I don't think many people get this. It doesn't even have to be discussed. It's about tradition and a man being able to take care of things. A woman can do this too if she wants.
When I was young and we would get together, My Grand Father would always pick up the tab. When I was a Teen my Dad or my Uncles would pick it up. They all made close to the same money, so they would do the "slip the Card to the waiter early in the night trick. Winner got to pay the bill.
So of course, as i became an adult and became successful it's my turn. And I love doing the "slip the card to the waiter trick" and beating out my Brother or cousins. Same thing when dating, I take care of it. Now if she made more than me, it may be different.
I think it's sweet
When we go out for a family meal my dad or brother in law always pay the bill. Us females never pay because they won't let us. It's really nice and it makes you feel taken care of however on a date I'd like to take turns as romantic as it is for him to pay I'd hate him to feel used or u appreciated plus its nice for the guy to get little treats too
I don't think many people get this. It doesn't even have to be discussed. It's about tradition and a man being able to take care of things. A woman can do this too if she wants.
When I was young and we would get together, My Grand Father would always pick up the tab. When I was a Teen my Dad or my Uncles would pick it up. They all made close to the same money, so they would do the "slip the Card to the waiter early in the night trick. Winner got to pay the bill.
So of course, as i became an adult and became successful it's my turn. And I love doing the "slip the card to the waiter trick" and beating out my Brother or cousins. Same thing when dating, I take care of it. Now if she made more than me, it may be different.
Actually I do know of that trick but it was the reverse for my dad and my uncles the loser had to pay the bill. Nothing negative about it though it was all in good fun and good times.
Not trying to knock you or anything I am laughing at the complete opposite intentions of the same situation.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Elained10
Not surprised at all
What? Don't be mad because I like a woman who does for herself. That, to me, means that she can get along without me but I get her time exclusively because she WANTS to give me her time. Don't be mad because I am a progressive guy who is not stuck in the g@#d*#n 1950s.
Personally, I'd be annoyed if the guy went to slip the card to the waiter behind my back. If you really do not want me to pay, just tell me, I won't insist like a crazy woman.
Just because I spent hours getting ready, does not mean the guy has to pay for anything.
He's not paying for my looks or my conversation skills.
Seeing him is enough.
Truthfully, if a guy were to pay every single time, I'd feel as though he's paying for my company.
What if the guy becomes broke? You stop seeing him? No.
I paid for my first date with my boyfriend who I have been with over 2 years now. Our next date I offered and he insisted, so I let him. We have been going "every other" ever since, or whoever feels like paying. I don't think either party was offended.
When I was dating in college, I always offered to pay, and if he insisted, I would let him. I think it's rude to go against someone who insists. I always tell them I appreciated the date and thanked them.
I don't see it as "tradition", but maybe it's the fact that I'm a 24 year old female.
I don't think there is ANYTHING wrong with not wanting to feel like I owe someone. I have seen men on here complaining about women who "ghost" on them after a few dates that they paid for, feeling like the women "owe" them some sort of explanation. I think the woman out of decency should tell you she is no longer interested, but I also don't like feeling like I owe anyone a thing, especially someone new.
I'm more lax with the boyfriend now, obviously. He makes around 30k/year more than I do now, so if he wants to spring on something nice for us, I absolutely let him. I paid for more when he was an unemployed grad student. We just took care of each other.
I also don't want a man to think that paying for our dates is my standard for being "taken care of". There are better ways to find out. To me, dinner is a mutual meeting of the minds. Nobody should be at advantage.
What? Don't be mad because I like a woman who does for herself. That, to me, means that she can get along without me but I get her time exclusively because she WANTS to give me her time. Don't be mad because I am a progressive guy who is not stuck in the g@#d*#n 1950s.
Mmmmmm........who said I was mad?
And FYI, I'm extremely independent however everyone likes to be treated sometimes. No one likes a cheap guy/women!!
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. Winner got to pay the bill. 
