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Yes, their view on abortion matters. Any "hard view" that disregards the seriousness of the issue is definitely a red flag in the person's fundamental values.
For example, a partner can be pro-choice in different ways:
* recognizes the complexity of the issue and is sympathetic to the female
* thinks it's no big deal and says if you have an "oops" you can just get rid of it
* says if there's an "oops" you HAVE to get rid of it (basically making the decision for the female)
A partner can be pro-life:
* Thinks preserving life is preferable
* Says government should decide for women (again, removing the woman's choice)
* Participates in violent demonstrations/acts against abortion
A person's view on abortion is very telling about how they walk thru life. A partner doesn't have to match my view, but their tone on the issue is very important.
I'm fine with different views on this, as long as they're not extremists one way or the other, though I would prefer to be with someone who shares my views on most of the hot issues of the times. I don't want to be involved with a placard carrying protester of any stripe when it comes to this issue.
I don't think I could be with someone who is staunchly pro life because I'm not ready for children right now and if there was a mistake, there is a strong change I would choose to abort.
Plus, he might see it as you having killed his kid. In one extreme example a guy killed the woman's other kid later on, but that's an extreme example. But you wouldn't want to earn someone's intense hatred as a general rule.
I suspect it is more of a dealbreaker for women than men. If you are a pro-choice woman, it would be hard to see eye to eye with a man who does not respect her right to make decisions about her own body, especially because that view of women as needing to be controlled can manifest in lots of different ways.
The OP expressly asked not to make it about the moral merits of abortion, but of course some people can't resist.
Who the heck said it was about controlling women? The only people who ever claim its about controlling women are the one's who AREN'T actually making the claim. Mod cut: Off topic.
WHere in that is there a hint of me wanting to "control women"?
I think this is why it's often times better to date someone who is on the same page about social issues. I couldn't deal with having a discussion like this with the person I was dating.
Is your partners views on abortion important to you? Is it a dealbreaker if they
have different views?
Since there is no way I could get pregnant I wouldn't much about my partners view on abortion. Its ok to disagree. If there were any chance I could become pregnant I would want to be on the same page in case it ever became a personal issue.
I believe around 50% of children are unplanned...it might even be more. I was an unplanned birth control baby and in all seriousness my parents probably should not have had me. Luckily, it all worked out in the end
I think it's up to the parents, obviously, and it's something that should be discussed prior to having sex. If you can't discuss your opinions on child rearing and pregnancy or birth control, you probably shouldn't be having sex with that person.
I believe around 50% of children are unplanned...it might even be more. I was an unplanned birth control baby and in all seriousness my parents probably should not have had me. Luckily, it all worked out in the end
I think it's up to the parents, obviously, and it's something that should be discussed prior to having sex. If you can't discuss your opinions on child rearing and pregnancy or birth control, you probably shouldn't be having sex with that person.
And I'd go so far as to say that if you can't imagine sharing parenthood with another person, you shouldn't be engaging in activities that may lead to parenthood with that person.
And I'd go so far as to say that if you can't imagine sharing parenthood with another person, you shouldn't be engaging in activities that may lead to parenthood with that person.
People need to be more "particular."
So, only people who want children should be allowed to have sex?!?!??!
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