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Hi everybody. Myhusband and I have been married just under two years and have a wonderfulrelationship. In large part that’s because we’re still madly in love witheachother and have the communication channels always open. We rarely disagreeon anything important and the odd time we do, we solve it and laugh.
Anyway we had a bit of an “issue” the other day and I’mlooking for objective views from a variety of people and that’s why I camehere.
We were at some friends’ home on Wednesday along withanother couple we’re close with. At some point we got to talking aboutrelationships and what it takes to be successful in a marriage. My contributionwas that I wanted a partner who loved me (obviously!), had a grip on realityand the challenges of life that we would face together, plus of course theusual: handsome, smart, funny.
We all talked about relationships and intimacy and howpast ones shape us to be the people we are today. Anyway, I pointed out that numbers don’treally matter and that it’s primarily quality. As an example, I brought up howI’ve had a few and my husband loves me. I also pointed out that hubby had onlyone prior relationship before me. Basically, he dated his high school sweetheartfor 8 years until something happened to her and their relationship ended. Shewas brought up very religious so they never had sex. And, of course, I love himeven though our backgrounds on the topic of sexual intimacy are prettydifferent.
Anyway, when we got home he told me that I shouldn’thave divulged that he was a virgin when we met. I told him that I was actuallyproud of him at having shown restraint with his ex and that he never pushed her.He says it was embarrassing to him that I told our friends. And he’s worriedthat they now “see him differently.” Not quite sure what that means but we’veagreed to discuss this tonight.
I love him for all of him and admire him (and the sexis fantastic! – I taught him well!!) but I still don’t think I did anything wrong.Having said that though, I don’t want this to become a bigger issue with him
I’m really interested in hearing people’s responses.Thanks.
When we were first married we lived in an apartment house that had five different units. Almost everyone in the units were newly weds. One night we had a couple over for cards and they were talking about their sex life. After they left, my husband told me that he wanted our sex life to be something we only discussed with each other. He said information like that was special and should not be shared with others. So I think he would agree with your husband. Our sexual history should not be shared. I think it would come under the heading of "too much information."
Thought this was going to be a small penis thread.
At any rate, sex is usually a private matter for most people and talking about someone else is usually a no-no.
Sorry but I am behind your husband. I would be very frustrated too if my partner divulged that kind of personal details to friends. Actually I would be more than frustrated...
Hope you guys can work it out!!! Good luck.
Anyway, when we got home he told me that I shouldn’thave divulged that he was a virgin when we met. I told him that I was actuallyproud of him at having shown restraint with his ex and that he never pushed her.He says it was embarrassing to him that I told our friends.
It's over.
Move on.
This is nothing.
If you think this is an "issue", wait until you have a "problem".
Of course my intent was NOT to embarrass him. Like I said I'm proud of him and shared that POSITIVE aspect. I didn't see it as a negative. And as a matter of fact we actually have joked around about how I have taught him "stuff."
Definitely negative and embarrassing, don't do that again
My guess is you'd be equally embarrassed or upset if he revealed something that you feel is a physical shortcoming, like very small boobs or unusual looking nipples. Most women have something about their body that they don't like, so imagine him divulging that, even if he said he liked it.
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