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^^^ I agree. You can only get away with feeding ducks, taking a hike, having an ice cream cone together, walking a dog from the dog pound, watching a sunset, or taking a drive before that gets realllly old for the woman. It isn't that a guy has to spend all kinds of money, or take us to an expensive restaurant, it is just a matter of showing a woman over time that you are interested and wanting to continue the relationship by doing things that may involve money, like going to the movies, playing miniature golf, going out to eat, etc. If you don't have the money to date or feel you refuse to spend any money on dates, then you shouldn't even be dating.
^^This.
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Hurricane, I'm not sure how old you are or how much $$ you have available to spend, but I strongly advise you do a little soul-searching and reevaluate what's important to you.
You definitely don't have to spend more than you're capable of, but you can't think of a date as anything more than just a reason to chill and get to know somebody new. Don't ever expect anything from anybody in return for anything in life, and you'll never be disappointed. Girls are not a machine that you can program to provide results from, and I assure you that you aren't doing yourself any favors by stressing about a girl paying for things on your dates and always thinking me me me me me what do I get what's in it for me. It's a very unbecoming personality trait.
The OP isn't the only guy on here who talks this way. Explains why so many of them are single.
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I can think of a handful of helpful comments, in all sincerity, that would help the OP understand when and when not to spend money on a date. Problem is, I feel like I waste too much effort on him and several other posters here without evidence that it does any good.
You're a bottomless pit of uncertainty, hurricane boy. Time to sink or swim.
I know we have a lot of threads in which certain men have voiced their complaints about having to pay for taking women on a date. I, on the other hand, don't mind paying for a date, as long as the date is cheaper than 10 dollars, total, after taxes. I refuse to take out women I am not in a relationship with to movies and restaurants, given the fact that I will be paying for some strangers meal who will probably never even return the favor, let alone guarantee a fun date. That said, if a woman offers to take me to a fancy place, I will insist on paying my share. Also said is that I wouldn't mind paying for better things in a serious relationship, even going as far as paying for a woman to be at home while the kids are not yet attending school.
Okay. With this post, I know that you are indeed not a real poster. You've been trolling us for years, haven't you? Good job, Jeter.
The only thing that an attractive woman hates more than a man without money, is a man that has money but chooses not to spend it on her.
Women that are attractive do not like cheap dates.
Now, time to hear from all of the women that are not hot that want to post about how it is okay if a man wants to take her on a cheap date. Women that are happy with cheap dates are women that do not have an option.
No, I agree with you. I've never encountered anyone like that. Well…I have encountered one guy who tallied up all the money he spent on me and reminded me of his "investment" when I was saying I was not sure we would work out, which is almost as bad as a cheapskate.
I don't mind cheap dates at all. Sometimes I suggest them when I know the guy doesn't have much money. There are 2 free zoos in my geographic area, the Philadelphia Museum of Art is free On Wednesdays, there are many low cost things to do if you put a little effort into finding them. I would much rather have a man take me to a free zoo and buy me a pretzel and an ice cream than take me someplace fancy and want to go dutch.
Hurricane, I'm not sure how old you are or how much $$ you have available to spend, but I strongly advise you do a little soul-searching and reevaluate what's important to you.
You definitely don't have to spend more than you're capable of, but you can't think of a date as anything more than just a reason to chill and get to know somebody new. Don't ever expect anything from anybody in return for anything in life, and you'll never be disappointed. Girls are not a machine that you can program to provide results from, and I assure you that you aren't doing yourself any favors by stressing about a girl paying for things on your dates and always thinking me me me me me what do I get what's in it for me. It's a very unbecoming personality trait.
Quote:
Originally Posted by brokencrayola
You can only get away with feeding ducks, taking a hike, having an ice cream cone together, walking a dog from the dog pound, watching a sunset, or taking a drive before that gets realllly old for the woman. It isn't that a guy has to spend all kinds of money, or take us to an expensive restaurant, it is just a matter of showing a woman over time that you are interested and wanting to continue the relationship by doing things that may involve money, like going to the movies, playing miniature golf, going out to eat, etc. If you don't have the money to date or feel you refuse to spend any money on dates, then you shouldn't even be dating.
Some of the money we spend is simply what happens over the course of a life. I can't worry about gifts I bought for friends who aren't my friends anymore, or spending money on dates that didn't turn into marriage, or even what I spent during my marriage although it ended in divorce. It's essentially the cost of admission to living life, because hopefully in those moments you were enjoying someone's company and having a good time.
SO and I rarely went on official dates outside of our houses. I think we've been to the movies 5 times in the last 3 years, and we don't often go out to eat. But even ordering in a pizza and sharing a bottle of wine is going to exceed the $10 limit, and that is hardly lavish or an unrealistic amount to spend.
You don't have to spend lavishly to have a good time, however the "best" dates are not going to be free either. There needs to be a certain generosity of spirit if you want to have a healthy relationship. No one should keep score or nickel and dime every situation to death.
I understand that THK is referring to low-cost dates when he says "cheap"...
But when most people think of a date as cheap, they're saying that the date is low-quality or low-class in some way. The guy may be overtly stingy...emphasis on the word "overtly". He may have exhibited laziness and/or zero thought in planning the date and during the date itself. In other words, it's like he doesn't give a damn about her and how she feels. These are strikes against the guy's character and attitude, not how thick or thin his wallet is.
It's the thought that counts. In general, people want to show their generosity for those they care about - be it their SO/GF/BF, their close friend(s), their close family members.
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