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No, you missed part of the story. The good text messaging was happening with the girl he's REALLY interested in. He was afraid she was miffed because she found out he was going on Spring Break with a mutual friend. But it turns out she's not really miffed, apparently. It's the one who's NOT going on spring break that he really likes. Ya gotta keep up, burgl.
Who needs TV when we have this?
I've been at the casino, I was going to read through the thread but the posts were so long
To further complicate this situation, let's say that there is another girl who is a mutual friend of both of me and the girl I'm going on the trip with whom I am VERY, VERY interested in, and whom I think might possibly be interested in me. We flirt pretty frequently (including some pretty sexually charged innuendo at times), get along extraordinarily well with some pretty great chemistry, and she is basically the biggest, hardest crush I've had since middle school lol.
The only reason I have not asked her out is because she is a spectacularly outgoing person and a natural flirt, and I just can't determine if she's genuinely interested or just being her naturally flirty self. And I have avoided asking her out because we both intern at the same office and are good friends there (in many ways like an office spouse), and if I ask her out and am wrong about her intentions, I feel it could have negative workplace implications.
Well, this girl that I am really interested in has of course heard about the trip, and seemed like she felt disapointed and excluded, and also made some mildy snide remarks about the trip.
Any advice on how to handle this little bit more complicated situation would be greatly appreciated. Basically I would hate to potentially screw things up with this girl, but I can't be passing up this trip (which seems like a pretty good opportunity) for the possibility that something might happen with this other girl.
You may give some thought to the fact that being asked by the girl is a way to snub the one you are interested in....Maybe it is a shady move meant to hurt your office spouse....Especially suspect is the fact that your office spouse only found out about the invite from the girl who invited you....And, you said that thy were not close....Seems odd to me. Ponder this.
Last edited by JanND; 02-25-2014 at 08:06 AM..
Reason: edit text
So I've known this girl for about 2 years, we've been friends, but not terribly close friends, and really haven't ever hung out alone together, always among a group and maybe only see each other a few times a month, and she just asked me to go on a week long trip alone with her. In the 2 years we've known each other, neither of us has really shown interest in each other outside of a very little bit of what I've only considered to friendly/joking/non-serious flirting. She is recently single, having just gotten out of a 3 year relationship about 6 weeks ago. I'm single as well. The trip is over our spring break, 4 weeks from now. She's 21 and a junior and I'm 22 and a senior.
She is also far more attractive than I am. I normally don't consider leagues, but sometimes you just have to be honest with yourself, and she's like an 8/10 and I'm like a male 5/10.
The trip is on. We've already booked our non-refundable plane tickets and gone to some lengths to each get out of working that week.
We are staying at a mutual female acquaintance's condo, and the mutual acquaintance will be there in the evening and weekend, but will be working during the day.
I probably won't make a move, as to not risk making the trip weird, but am very open to "things" happening if she makes any kind of hints or moves. I'm guessing she understands that I'd be interested, being that she is attractive and kinda knows it lol, and that I'm single and a dude.
But I'm also worried that she might think I'm gay, being that she receives plenty of aggressive male interest of what's seemingly a daily basis, turning down all of it, and in the 2 years we've known each other I've never tried making a move, when almost every other guy she knows has lol.
She organized the trip and asked me to go on it.
Is there anything for me to read into here?
Have you lost your mind? Make your move.
And the entire notion of leagues is really dumb. There is no such thing as a league. Banish that term because it really doesn't belong in an adult's vocabulary. There is no AAA or AA or Major Leagues, for that is nothing more than the construction of people who devote way too much time thinking with their heads rather than following their hearts. There is no league here. There is nothing but you and her, chemistry and long, heartfelt conversations. And the fact that she has chosen to spend an entire week traveling with you somewhere cool says a great deal, especially if lots of other guys are hitting on her.
Strike while the iron is hot. If you don't, she'll wonder what's wrong with her. Then she'll start to wonder what's wrong with you.
And the entire notion of leagues is really dumb. There is no such thing as a league. Banish that term because it really doesn't belong in an adult's vocabulary. There is no AAA or AA or Major Leagues, for that is nothing more than the construction of people who devote way too much time thinking with their heads rather than following their hearts. There is no league here. There is nothing but you and her, chemistry and long, heartfelt conversations. And the fact that she has chosen to spend an entire week traveling with you somewhere cool says a great deal, especially if lots of other guys are hitting on her.
Strike while the iron is hot. If you don't, she'll wonder what's wrong with her. Then she'll start to wonder what's wrong with you.
But there's a girl he likes a lot more. The plot has thickened. He left out that crucial fact in his OP.
No woman has ever been attracted to any man for being a good, honest guy. No woman has gotten hot and bothered by honesty and modesty.
Of course they have! That's how the shy guys and the average guys end up married! Women noticed them, and made the first move, because they're into that kind of guy! I know many cases of this. A good, honest guy is the holy grail for many women. They make great, faithful partners.
If you sleep with Girl 1, your chances with Girl 2 are over unless she has low self esteem or is obsessed with you.
You should express in some sort of way to Girl 2 that despite everything, she is always the priority.
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