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Maybe I lack emotional maturity, but I find the beginning stages of courtship/romance much more enjoyable than when things actually get real. Rationally, I'd like to find someone to settle down with, but I can't seem to get over the possibilities I'm able to project on someone new that I'm still getting to know. Is there something wrong with me? Am I a commitmentaphobe?
No I don't think anything is wrong with you. It's quite possible the right person hasn't come along yet but yes it is also possible you are falling in love with the idea of being in love.
Love is not all kittens and rainbows. There are going to be some tough spots. I'm quite sure you know all of this, as the evidence is apparent in your post. The fact that you seem to not want to deal with the stressful situations that relationships sometimes entail, seems to support my theory on the fact that you just haven't met the right person yet. Once you do, it'll probably hit you like a ton of bricks. Not saying that's a bad thing. lol
In my experience when I would crush hard on someone, I really just crushed hard on the idea of being with them. I would imagine it being a lot greater than it actually would have been if I had actually made a move. This has happened to me a lot, so it is pretty frustrating. I think you should try to analyze why you feel as though you can't get passed a certain stage when it comes to liking someone. Don't stress too much on it though.
I think a lot of people fall in love with ideas and possibilities. Some women will love you for who you could be (which you may or may not agree with or want for yourself) and some women will love you for who you are.
Maybe I lack emotional maturity, but I find the beginning stages of courtship/romance much more enjoyable than when things actually get real. Rationally, I'd like to find someone to settle down with, but I can't seem to get over the possibilities I'm able to project on someone new that I'm still getting to know. Is there something wrong with me? Am I a commitmentaphobe?
I think perhaps you know that the entire relationship is not going to be as exciting and interesting as it is when first dating and that is the part that you like the most.
It is fun, mysterious, exciting and basically play time all the time, the real world of dating, relationships, marriage and responsibility is what you don't want so you choose the fantasy play time until you become too comfortable and familar.
Maybe I lack emotional maturity, but I find the beginning stages of courtship/romance much more enjoyable than when things actually get real. Rationally, I'd like to find someone to settle down with, but I can't seem to get over the possibilities I'm able to project on someone new that I'm still getting to know. Is there something wrong with me? Am I a commitmentaphobe?
Courtship and something new is exciting!
It creates dopamine in the brain.
Which we all like.
But it can still be fun and exciting as time goes on.
Maybe I lack emotional maturity, but I find the beginning stages of courtship/romance much more enjoyable than when things actually get real. Rationally, I'd like to find someone to settle down with, but I can't seem to get over the possibilities I'm able to project on someone new that I'm still getting to know. Is there something wrong with me? Am I a commitmentaphobe?
If you have never been in love with someone - it's pretty hard to imagine what it's like. After the euphoric courtship stage comes something deeper, truer, and more meaningful. If, after the euphoric stage, you are then bored and not happy spending time with that person - then it's not love. It was just lust.
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