Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
My point was that the OP has likely attracted men who have their act together (and probably had some level of advanced education) and are not "project men," but those guys were not up to her standards of "hotness."
The guys who are up to that standard are more likely to be "project guys."
Do you have an education? If not, are you of the opinion that getting one would serve no purpose?
Single men who are educated will date single moms. I've been a single mom and dated them.
I'm just saying they are more likely to date a single mom who is also educated.
And...one isn't likely to be a single mom who has no degree and 2 kids from different dads while collecting food stamps who can land a man who has his act together and looks like a male model who stars in country western music videos.
On edit: yeah. It's a stereotype. Men can be hot and smart. But, if they are under the age of about 45, they'll probably be looking for someone younger than the OP who has no kids.
Out of 32 men, only two owned their own homes and had decent jobs. One was just really dull. I wanted to be attracted to him but could not muster it up. The other guy was significantly overweight. Obese is just gross to me.
I have a sister in law who married her husband because of this.
I do not mean to offend, but what I see from a person such as yourself is you are an enabler. You somehow emit a vibe to the other person that you want to control/help in a relationship - in short, you want to be in the drivers seat. The only way to do that is to be somehow attracted to someone else in more need than yourself.
It's not that you are a catch or a prize to the other person, but instead it's as if you hold yourself out to be their "savior", someone who can balance their life out, and it's something you do.
This is similar to what my friend was describing. I am attracting them but I have finally learned my lesson and sending them packing when they exhibit this neediness. I have stopped being willing to help straighten their lives so when will I stop attracting them?
There was a man in Michigan that won a small lottery prize and still received benefits. They've changed the WIC program so now they just issue EBT cards with a set dollar amount that loads each month and can only be used to purchase "food" (define that as you will). At my income, despite single parent status, I don't qualify.
What the OP continues to fail on is realizing that she's apparently NOT all that she believes she is. Until she accepts that she's not the "great catch" she believes herself to be, she will continue to focus on the wrong priorities for a mate. I'm preaching to the choir, I know.
The men that fall under the OP's desired list (wealthy, good with money, trendy, smart, good looking, etc) all have the pick of the litter. She's not hitting that top percentage (could be from looks, baggage, or just craptastic attitude?). Until she fixes what is not putting her at that top percentage, she will continue to get the types of men that she's attracting in.
Ah, but self reflection is a doozie.. It means you gotta be honest with yourself.
Maybe, but I would rather be single then settle for a douchebag just to say I am in a relationship.
Ah so she isn't giving the guys that have their stuff together because they aren't hot? Well that's just narrowminded.
Yes I'm educated, getting what a man? Yes he would serve a purpose.
Lol educated women can be single with many kids.Example would be a woman who divorced three guys and had children with all of them.Maybe her education should of got her better birth control.
But you are right smart men can be very hot.
I have only been out with two guys that seemed to have their stuff together. The one I really wanted to be attracted to him, I could just not make it work. The other guy was severely overweight and posted really old pictures.
She needs to change her mind set but I see many ladies that like the needy man.They like to feel wanted.Personally I have a child, I don't need another.lol!
This entire thread you've been talking about how glamorous your lifestyle is; your expensive cars, expensive houses, expensive jewelry, expensive clothes, etc. Yet, you have no college degree, you're collecting food stamps, you have two kids from two different daddys, and you're working an admin job? I doubt you're grossing over $45k/yr, and I'm even more doubtful you're netting $10k/yr. I know people like you back from where I grew up. Living high on the hog on very little income. We used to call that hood rich. Do you even have a 401k, HSA, or IRA set up? Doubtful.
I think Chowhound has you pegged. You sound like a project girl yourself. You need to reassess your standards IMO.
Lol I increased my net worth by $50k this WEEK. Was your week that good?
Your right that from my job I do not make more than $45k. But I do net way more than $10k. Yes, I do have a 401k, HSA and IRA. Also have 529's, Roth IRA, life insurance and trust.
I was thinking about the OP while getting ready to go out.
If you're the smartest person in the room all the time, of course you'll constantly get people asking for your advice/help.
Sounds like she works with a good many incapable people.
Change your environment, OP.
If you worked at a Fortune 50 company (and I don't mean in the warehouse) you'd not be likely to have MBAs and finance majors asking for your financial advice.
I do work at a Fortune 500 company. And I gave financial advice to an engineer this week.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
