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I've noticed the opposite. I notice that men don't care how much a woman sleeps/slept around when it comes to marriage.
Women, your body is your body. All if these 'rules' for marriage are not that crucial to a lot if men.
Ummm.... yeah I'm gunna have to disagree with you on this one. Nobody wants to marry the town bicycle. If you're a woman who has slept with a lot of guys, best keep it to yourself when you find a man worth marrying, and you better not cheat on him either.
What we don't care about is if you're number is 10-20 guys. Meh, 20 is well above average but whatever (I'm talking about women at marrying age, 25-35 yrs old). But if it's like 60+.... not attractive at all. Why would such a person suddenly stop enjoying the company of new guys? And why would a eligible man choose a easy woman to marry when there are so many who don't give it up to every dude who gives them a second look?
People who are monogamous by nature have a low number of sexual partners. They see no point to one night stands and sleeping around in general, it does nothing for them. It's just how they are wired. Marriage is monogamy. Marrying someone who shows no monogamous tendencies is not a good idea.
Have you always been "programmed" to date interracially? I remember having crushes on a few black celebrities when I was a kid, but I fell really hard for Joey McIntyre from New Kids on the Block when I was about 8 or 9 years old. After that, I mostly had crushes on non-black guys with a few black guys mixed in there. And I still have a soft spot for Joey after all these years. When we met, he called me "sweetheart" and I got to take a picture with him!
Did he sing, 'please don't go girl' to you while 'hanging tough' with his friends, telling them 'you got the right stuff?'
I've noticed the opposite. I notice that men don't care how much a woman sleeps/slept around when it comes to marriage.
Women, your body is your body. All if these 'rules' for marriage are not that crucial to a lot if men.
Nope, they don't. I presume these are mostly young "men" that think they have all these "rules" that will be gone by mid 30s at the latest. These also, from what I've seen, tend not to be males that have female friends. They're not used to looking at women as true peers.
Of course, I've read on here the belief that some of these young "men" have that there is data that more promiscuous women tend to cheat in marriages more, while more promiscuous men don't, or something along those lines. I've never seen this data. A citation to a study of this phenomena would be appreciated.
I have this situation were alot of people I know tell me that I'm a great looking guy, that I have a nice body, and I have a great personality. And they also tell me that I dress pretty cool too. But for some reason, it's hard for me to get dates. I can initiate convo sometimes, I can be totally cool when talking, and handle rejection just fine. I do think i have good personality. I dont come off desperate either. Im talking about getting dates with "average" girls. I don't go after the "model" types. Average is hot to me. Alot of the girls that I find hot, other guys don't. I just don't know what I am doing wrong still. Do you think women get intimidated by someone like me(I doubt it)? How many of you other guys have/had a problem like this?
What kind of car do you drive, what is your occupation, what kind of home do you have, how much income do you make. Are you marriage or boyfriend material in girls minds.
Girls are not like stupid guys who just want hot girls and could care about the rest
Ummm.... yeah I'm gunna have to disagree with you on this one. Nobody wants to marry the town bicycle. If you're a woman who has slept with a lot of guys, best keep it to yourself when you find a man worth marrying, and you better not cheat on him either.
What we don't care about is if you're number is 10-20 guys. Meh, 20 is well above average but whatever (I'm talking about women at marrying age, 25-35 yrs old). But if it's like 60+.... not attractive at all. Why would such a person suddenly stop enjoying the company of new guys? And why would a eligible man choose a easy woman to marry when there are so many who don't give it up to every dude who gives them a second look?
You're making the incorrect assumption that a person like that can't be or doesn't want to be monogamous. That is incorrect. Lots of young women played the field in their teens an 20s then marry and have long healthy and stable marriages. There is nothing unusual about this at all. Being a 40 something guy who have dated several divorcees, it isn't odd to meet women who had fun, married, divorced after being monogamous 10-20 years, then go out and have fun while they're single, then back into a monogamous relationship when they meet the right person. It is no different from a male.
And what are the women "give"ing up? This is some bizarre antiquated notion that the woman is turning over or surrendering something of hers to a man she sleeps with. She isn't. She is having sex, just like the guy is. I've never seen a guy say "he gave it up" to easily when he slept with someone. There is no difference.
Some people on this board are still living in the 1950s. There is nothing wrong, dirty, or demeaning or devaluing about connecting with someone in a sexual encounter, whether it is a one time encounter or a ten year relationship. Neither are negatives in any way.
Ummm.... yeah I'm gunna have to disagree with you on this one. Nobody wants to marry the town bicycle. If you're a woman who has slept with a lot of guys, best keep it to yourself when you find a man worth marrying, and you better not cheat on him either.
What we don't care about is if you're number is 10-20 guys. Meh, 20 is well above average but whatever (I'm talking about women at marrying age, 25-35 yrs old). But if it's like 60+.... not attractive at all. Why would such a person suddenly stop enjoying the company of new guys? And why would a eligible man who's kept it in his pants choose a easy woman to marry when there are so many who don't give it up to every dude who gives them a second look?
Umm, okay. It's okay that you disagree. My personal experiences tell me otherwise. Most men don't truly know how many men a woman has been with anyway and it's truly none if their business.
I don't agree with promiscuity for either sex sense both are not immune to the excess baggage it brings upon others, so while men are high fived for being a garden tool, I think it shows insecurity, not masculinity.
With this whole marriage rules thing, there's no rhyme or reason. I've seen women marry a man they screwed in the first date, women get married who have been 'passed around KNOWINGLY' as I have seen women who didn't engage in promiscuity still a'waiting for that proposal.
A woman's marriage prospect is not determined by her 'purity.' This concept puts women in unnecessary bondage.
You're making the incorrect assumption that a person like that can't be or doesn't want to be monogamous. That is incorrect. Lots of young women played the field in their teens an 20s then marry and have long healthy and stable marriages. There is nothing unusual about this at all. Being a 40 something guy who have dated several divorcees, it isn't odd to meet women who had fun, married, divorced after being monogamous 10-20 years, then go out and have fun while they're single, then back into a monogamous relationship when they meet the right person. It is no different from a male.
And what are the women "give"ing up? This is some bizarre antiquated notion that the woman is turning over or surrendering something of hers to a man she sleeps with. She isn't. She is having sex, just like the guy is. I've never seen a guy say "he gave it up" to easily when he slept with someone. There is no difference.
Some people on this board are still living in the 1950s. There is nothing wrong, dirty, or demeaning or devaluing about connecting with someone in a sexual encounter, whether it is a one time encounter or a ten year relationship. Neither are negatives in any way.
Hey, you can do whatever you want. Me and most guys I know are not into sluts, and for sure won't marry one. I'm not even judging her for sleeping around, she can do whatever she wants. But that doesn't mean I have to marry her. There are many many women who don't bang 40-100 guys by the time they hit their mid-late 20's, in fact the vast majority haven't. I'll marry one of them.
The way I see it is this: promiscuous women are that way because that's the way they are. SOCIETY on the other hand, dictates that you eventually have to settle down and marry someone. That's just the way it is right now, although it is changing. They are programmed by society from a very young age that they have to settle down at a certain point, but their inherent nature is to be promiscuous. This is a issue.
Women who's inherent nature is to be monogamous are that way in their youth. They have slept with 2-6 guys only because they were in serious relationships with them, and the prospect of sleeping with random guys never was or will be desirable to them. That is the woman I and a lot of guys want to marry. We can trust her, she is wired for monogamy.
Guys are the same way. Some are all about sleeping around, others see no point in it and only sleep with women they care about and are in a serious relationship with.
Me personally I'm in the latter group. One night stands to me are like skiing 2% of the way down a sweet run, stopping, kicking your skis off and climbing back to the top and hitting another run for 2%. There is no point to it in my mind, it doesn't compute. Why would I marry a woman who has spent her life doing that? Our mindsets aren't even close to the same, it's just asking for problems years down the line.
Marriage is not something to take lightly as a man who has net worth. You are essentially betting her half your stuff that she will love and stay with you forever. I'm not betting half my crap on a woman who's spent her whole life sleeping around, not a smart move.
Hey, you can do whatever you want. Me and most guys I know are not into sluts, and for sure won't marry one. I'm not even judging her for sleeping around, she can do whatever she wants. But that doesn't mean I have to marry her. There are many many women who don't bang 40-100 guys by the time they hit their mid-late 20's, in fact the vast majority haven't. I'll marry one of them.
The way I see it is this: promiscuous women are that way because that's the way they are. SOCIETY on the other hand, dictates that you eventually have to settle down and marry someone. That's just the way it is right now, although it is changing. They are programmed by society from a very young age that they have to settle down at a certain point, but their inherent nature is to be promiscuous. This is a issue.
Women who's inherent nature is to be monogamous are that way in their youth. They have slept with 2-6 guys only because they were in serious relationships with them, and the prospect of sleeping with random guys never was or will be desirable to them. That is the woman I and a lot of guys want to marry. We can trust her, she is wired for monogamy.
Guys are the same way. Some are all about sleeping around, others see no point in it and only sleep with women they care about and are in a serious relationship with.
Me personally I'm in the latter group. One night stands to me are like skiing 2% of the way down a sweet run, stopping, kicking your skis off and climbing back to the top and hitting another run for 2%. There is no point to it in my mind, it doesn't compute.
Have you never considered that maybe you'll marry the person you fall in love with and loves you?
Your point of view is an enigma to me. Really. Certainly some people are more monogamous in nature than others, and marrying someone more monogamous is certainly more desirable than not (IMO). But absolutely nothing I've seen in some 30 years of dating and having sex indicates that men or women that, when they're not in monogamous relationships, are open to connecting with others sexually during either short term relationships or one off encounters, are any more prone to infidelity. I have no idea where this notion comes from. The encounters are completely different, a vacation fling, a one night stand, or having a lover of 10 years can all be wonderful things, they're just different.
The term sl*t, while being (thankfully) be reclaimed, indicates that there is something negative about having sex for enjoyment sake or outside of a committed relationship. Hopefully that viewpoint continues to disappear.
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