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You seem like a genuinely good person who has a high level of empathy and understanding towards the men you date. I'm sure you're a great girl to go out with.
Thanks Lafleur, that is really nice of you to say.
I've always tried to be fair about paying for meals, activities and things like that, even before I really understood the value of money. Mostly because it boils down to being fair in general, a principle that I've constantly stuck to.
Some people at 24 don't have a serious concept of money/finances yet, though. You'd be surprised to find out how many people I know who are cheap when they don't need to be, and spend when they can't afford it. Maybe she's under the impression you can afford everything or thought you were being cheap? $100 for drinks is not AT ALL cheap to me, but then again, I've been raised knowing that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lafleur
Looking up recipes later, but it's probably going to be a salmon recipe with a side dish and spring mixed greens. A decent bottle of wine to go along with it.
I love salmon (and wine)!! I bet she will like it a lot.
Looking up recipes later, but it's probably going to be a salmon recipe with a side dish and spring mixed greens. A decent bottle of wine to go along with it.
Salmon is really easy to prepare. Brown rice is a good side dish. You could even make it a brown rice casserole of some sort. Then you can have the leftovers for your own dinners, after work.
Thanks Lafleur, that is really nice of you to say.
I've always tried to be fair about paying for meals, activities and things like that, even before I really understood the value of money. Mostly because it boils down to being fair in general, a principle that I've constantly stuck to.
Some people at 24 don't have a serious concept of money/finances yet, though. You'd be surprised to find out how many people I know who are cheap when they don't need to be, and spend when they can't afford it. Maybe she's under the impression you can afford everything or thought you were being cheap? $100 for drinks is not AT ALL cheap to me, but then again, I've been raised knowing that.
In the beginning stages of dating a woman, I'm always the one who pays when I'm interested in the person. Might not be the best habit, but it's what I do nonetheless. But as Ruth said, you can't go on expecting that I'm going to pay for everything any time I ask her to hang out. I'm not made of money after all, and I have other financial goals I'm trying to achieve (travelling abroad, buying a home in a high COL area for instance). I absolutely adore a woman who understands that and is willing to participate.
In the beginning stages of dating a woman, I'm always the one who pays when I'm interested in the person. Might not be the best habit, but it's what I do nonetheless.
I think a lot of guys do that. In my past, I've still offered to pay at those times, and I'll let the guy pay if he really wants to. My idea is that I will offer so he doesn't feel like he HAS to, but if he wants to, go ahead.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lafleur
But as Ruth said, you can't go on expecting that I'm going to pay for everything any time I ask her to hang out. I'm not made of money after all, and I have other financial goals I'm trying to achieve (travelling abroad, buying a home in a high COL area for instance).
Absolutely. The question becomes - when does the man have to stop paying for everything? On the 5th date? the tenth? When you become official? There's no line there and a lot of people, like me, want to be clear about it. Whether it is the 1st or 100th date, I generally offer to pay, regardless. Several other women on this forum have said they do the same.
Going back a few posts, what Ruth said about low-maintenance makes a lot of sense to me. Low-maintenance, to me, is the equivalent of a down-to-earth person, and they don't expect much other than to spend time with the person they like. I'll begrudgingly use myself as an example, though I'm not trying to make myself look like some perfect person: I remember my first date with my current boyfriend. He Yelp'd a well-regarded soup/salad place and took me there, but it wasn't a sit-down fancy restaurant, just a diner where you ordered at the counter. He got really embarrassed but I thought it was great! As long as it is good food and I get to spend time with my date, what do I care? If I was a guy and took a woman to a place like that and she turned her nose up at it, I'd be pretty worried.
On the plus side, your friend does not seem like that kind of uppity person. I just wonder whether she has the maturity about the financial side yet.
so i just read almost this entire thread and REALLY wanna know what happened at dinner!!
OP? what was of this lovely story of the overthinker and the kind of aloof girl? Im seriously asking. How was the salmon? did you talk to her? broke up with her? are u still dating?
so i just read almost this entire thread and REALLY wanna know what happened at dinner!!
OP? what was of this lovely story of the overthinker and the kind of aloof girl? Im seriously asking. How was the salmon? did you talk to her? broke up with her? are u still dating?
haha! Good questions! It seems that the OP has been banned. This is news to me, I only now noticed it.
That's weird, he seemed like a pretty decent dude overall.
He had is relationship qualms, but he seemed relatively aware of his surroundings. He didn't just live in a vacuum.
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I love salmon (and wine)!! I bet she will like it a lot.
