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This sounds like an abusive relationship. You need recognize that you deserve someone who respects you. You do not wish choose another like him. Think of it as a learning experience you wish not repeat.
Meanwhile do not contact him.
This should be the time in your life to find out about yourself--- not hitch yourself to someone else's star. You can take a class, get a new hobby, exercise daily, volunteer somewhere, and meet new people. Good luck.
I think you're confused. The second example, yes, I've expierenced that and I know plenty of other people that have. Some people are emotionally closed off at the time, and don't want a relationship at the time. And then yeah they meet someone and everything is fine. These people are temporarily "closed off." They didn't change their entire viewpoint on life and relationships.
That's not what happened with my buddy Matt. Matt suffered two hard breakups before he was 21, and literally "changed his way of thinking." He lives in the present now, does not make promises to anyone anymore, and considers himself "transient." (Aka ever changing) He says he's been happier with this way of life.
He hates the idea of marriage, and like I said before HATES expectations. He's doesn't have family or friend guidance, and not many healthly relationships in his life in general.
Side note that I never mentioned because I made a thread about it and I got banned for 3 days, he liked to pretend he was my pimp or something. He used to ask me to do oral on strangers and tell him about it.
So.
Yeah.
He's a complicated individual.
And then you hear girls say, "where are all the nice guys" and, "you should respect women" and, "I don't date dbags" and, "I want a guy that treats me right"...... This right here, is why a lot of men don't understand the hypocritical ways in which a lot of women think. This right here.....no one forced you into that relationship. You made your own choices. Don't go trolling for sympathy.
And then you hear girls say, "where are all the nice guys" and, "you should respect women" and, "I don't date dbags" and, "I want a guy that treats me right"...... This right here, is why a lot of men don't understand the hypocritical ways in which a lot of women think. This right here..... Don't go trolling for sympathy
I know, I know. It's really bad isn't it? I'm honestly not even hurt by him anymore I'm just confused why I got so sucked into it.
The first time he asked me to do that, I told him no but he never stopped mentioning it. He didn't respect my beliefs on that.
He made his last "girl" do it while he hid in the closet and watched. Then he was confused why she cheated on him.
Okay clearly everyone knows now he's a crazy and I'm stupid for sticking around. *Walks away*
I wasn't kidding. People that "can't commit" or "aren't relationship material" are a dime a dozen. Then most meet the right person and suddenly these things are no longer issues. They just hadn't met the right person.
It's not far from the person that says "I like you, but I don't want to be in a relationship right now", which means I have no interest in dating you, but if the right person came along they'd suddenly be ready for a relationship.
In a way, you were. People either have no problem and they just say this to avoid relationships with people they don't want or they have a problem and no amount of "treating them well" is going to cure their problem.
Bottom line is this: when someone tells you they're bad at relationships? Believe them.
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How many red flags do you need to see before you STOP seeing the situation as what you HOPE it will be and see it for what it is?????????
You have serious issues that you need to talk about with a pro. For real.
Me? Besides no self respect and being weak?
I'm so strong in basically every aspect of my life but when it comes to men and relationships I kind of have no backbone and let people walk on me, especially after I've developed feelings.
Well what can I realistically do about it? Besides seeing a therapist. I don't think I need a therapist. Do you have any suggestions?
Exercise better judgement and fully utilize your common sense. What kind of guy ask their gf to do sexual stuff with another man while he hide to watch?? If your relationship works out, his pimp desire want you to do the same because he loves you so much, would you do it for him?
He laid his cards all out for you to see and still you went for it. You might need a therapist more than you think you need.
I'm so strong in basically every aspect of my life but when it comes to men and relationships I kind of have no backbone and let people walk on me, especially after I've developed feelings.
Don't let your feelings rule your head. It is hard to do when you fall for someone but too many red flags is definitely a bad sign!
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