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Actually he did not "take" anything, you agreed to allow him to make you a non virgin.
He is right he does not owe you anything so leave the man alone and move on already and since you broke up, you are long distance and you stated in your first sentence you feel the relationship was destined to fail anyway, what exactly is there to work out?
Go back to the second page, I replied to this question. He lost interest in me, I wanted closure. That's all.
Don't leave the porch light on, when it comes to closure.....that normally doesn't happen. More time, and tears have been wasted waiting for closure. Don't get caught up on the emotional roller coaster, where you curse, then try to understand, then plot, all in the name of clearing the air.....BTW, stop short changing yourself.....he didn't take anything from you....you handed it to him, it was a gift, not a theft....
You didn't really have a relationship. You had a weekend (or however many day) fling with someone you didn't really know.
Nothing wrong with that. But call it what it was.
Okay well that's kind of rude of you to be honest. Yeah we met once but we've been talking everyday since October. Everyday. Long phone calls, texting and Skype. Please don't belittle it. I clearly care about him.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,937 posts, read 36,940,305 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by alaskandaisy
Okay well that's kind of rude of you to be honest. Yeah we met months but we've been talking everyday since October. Everyday. Long phone calls, texting and Skype. Please don't belittle it. I clearly care about him.
I'm not belittling it. I'm calling it what it was. There is nothing wrong with what it was. I've had pen pals and text pals, etc for years and years. It's not the same as really knowing someone and hanging out with them. It's artificial.
I'm not belittling it. I'm calling it what it was. There is nothing wrong with what it was. I've had pen pals and text pals, etc for years and years. It's not the same as really knowing someone and hanging out with them. It's artificial.
Okay that's fair. Honestly you're right, because I feel like after he visited he changed. Like the month after really, I felt like all of a sudden he was a different person.
Can I ask what your thoughts are about him not wanting to put up with expectations in a relationship? Do you think that's a good mentality?
Is this the only person you have been really been attracted to? It is doubtful he will be the only and last one. It sounds like although you didn't get everything that you wanted out of this "relationship" he did. He shows his true colors when he says that the best he can offer is a "friend's with benefits" thing with you. That is pretty thoughtless and selfish on his part when he knows you have feelings for him beyond that.
Believe it or not, he is actually doing you a favor. Now you are free to date and see whoever you want without the restraints of a long distance relationship with someone who doesn't sound like he was much of a catch to begin with.
Okay that's fair. Honestly you're right, because I feel like after he visited he changed. Like the month after really, I felt like all of a sudden he was a different person.
Can I ask what your thoughts are about him not wanting to put up with expectations in a relationship? Do you think that's a good mentality?
It doesn't matter what his thoughts are, there was nothing you could have done to make this end any differently. You're young, and will learn, that some people suck, and nothing you do will change that. It's something they need to do on their own. The best thing for you to do, is something that makes no sense right now. If you block him from ever contacting you, and you resist the urge to contact him...you will heal much faster. Well he is your first, and you are entitled to feel the way you do, but just to warn you, there are no words...no actions...directed toward him, that will make it better. Distancing from him, is the best medicine to cure you of your sadness.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,937 posts, read 36,940,305 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by alaskandaisy
Can I ask what your thoughts are about him not wanting to put up with expectations in a relationship? Do you think that's a good mentality?
I don't have any thoughts about him or his views as I've never spoken to him.
I'm not going to tell him what is "good" for him or not. There are plenty of people that at points in their life need to focus on themselves and emotionally/mentally shouldn't be involved in a relationship as they don't have the capacity to support others. There is nothing inherently wrong with that.
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