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It is also entirely possible that you're noticing the fit guys (they are on your radar) because you're checking to see if you measure up, but the guys who aren't buff and/or who are overweight aren't on your radar. You are looking harder for the fit, attractive females than you are for those overweight and/or out of shape ladies, so if you don't see as many of those fit women as you might like, you're convinced that there aren't as many of them as there are of those buff guys you see.
Perception is a funny thing.
Also, since you now DO make a decent living and enough to support a family, you should be MORE worried about hooking up with a woman who has no career and/or no sort of way to support herself because this is the very type of female you'd have to pay a big chunk of your money to in alimony if your marriage failed. And even more of it if you two had kids. Even if you shared custody, the expectation is that the children be kept in the lifestyle they became accustomed to during the marriage, so if you could afford to keep the house and the wife had only enough for a small apartment, she's gonna get more of your money until you both wind up living in similar dwellings and the kids have similar home environments as they go from one residence to the other.
Marry a woman with a decent career making a good sum of money (though making the same as you isn't exactly necessary, because women do tend to make less for the same/similar work as men), and you'll find you get to keep more of your take-home pay if the marriage doesn't work out.
I know a guy who divorced a SAHM and she was SAHM by their mutual choice. She's been out of the workforce for decades so guess who is paying out more than half his income to the ex? He is.
Yes it is one of the male paradoxes. The more successful men tend to look for an attractive good wife and mother and care less about what she does for a living. Hence the 'trophy wife' concept. In so doing he sets himself up to possibly lose more if the marriage doesn't work out.
Your last paragraph also is a good example of why men are avoiding marriage. That guy you know married a woman that never worked during their marriage and now doesn't have to work because she is living off of him even though they are not married anymore. It is a parasitic relationship now. I'd like to know what his opinion is on marriage now :P
The stats in the OP don't paint a very clear picture. Single motherhood is booming, so the idea that the prospect of child support keeps a lot of guys from marriage doesn't make sense to me.
Of course women know men better than men themselves. /sarc
And of course men know women better than women themselves.
Men in these blogs seem to have all sorts of complains and have analyzed what women are "really" like (all which is not very good).
And so I guess the world is supposed to go like this:
Don't listen to what women think of women. What do they know?
Don't listen to what women think of men. What do they know?
Quote:
Of course they're putting up the façade for the ladies in their lives....you have something we need.
Now let me guess. What might that be?
Someone to decorate your house? To cook your meals? To choose which shirt to wear with those pants?
I've heard this said among the MRA/MGTOW crowd before. That there's this one thing that women have (access to sex) and without that, men would want nothing to do with them at all, they're just so vile and awful otherwise. And a lot of these men are very bitter and resentful that women are allowed to refuse to have sex too. The only thing they're good for, and they aren't giving it out on demand? Or maybe they are giving it out, but not just to the men complaining about these horrible women! Well, whatever it is the women are doing, they're doing it wrong.
LOL, I can't make this stuff up.
Notice that I didn't say you think this. I don't have any idea. But since you brought the subject up, it reminded me of what many of these men complain about. That essentially, women are a waste of time, except for that one thing...
I've heard this said among the MRA/MGTOW crowd before. That there's this one thing that women have (access to sex) and without that, men would want nothing to do with them at all, they're just so vile and awful otherwise. And a lot of these men are very bitter and resentful that women are allowed to refuse to have sex too. The only thing they're good for, and they aren't giving it out on demand? Or maybe they are giving it out, but not just to the men complaining about these horrible women! Well, whatever it is the women are doing, they're doing it wrong.
LOL, I can't make this stuff up.
Notice that I didn't say you think this. I don't have any idea. But since you brought the subject up, it reminded me of what many of these men complain about. That essentially, women are a waste of time, except for that one thing...
Gawd! This sounds like a bunch of men with mommy issues.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Montanaguy04
Yes it is one of the male paradoxes. The more successful men tend to look for an attractive good wife and mother and care less about what she does for a living. Hence the 'trophy wife' concept. In so doing he sets himself up to possibly lose more if the marriage doesn't work out.
Well, this just amplifies one thing. That a lot of people still consider more successful as being earning more, and that those that earning more are often really stupid.
Which is why so many people I know, well educated, accomplished, brilliant people reject the notion that success = money = smarts.
I've heard this said among the MRA/MGTOW crowd before. That there's this one thing that women have (access to sex) and without that, men would want nothing to do with them at all, they're just so vile and awful otherwise. And a lot of these men are very bitter and resentful that women are allowed to refuse to have sex too. The only thing they're good for, and they aren't giving it out on demand? Or maybe they are giving it out, but not just to the men complaining about these horrible women! Well, whatever it is the women are doing, they're doing it wrong.
Tbh, I can kind of relate to that. If it wasn't for sex and the fact that I find women so tantalizing I wouldn't hang out with them. With my guy friends we go out, do something and BS around, but with my girl friends they talk and talk and talk, often about nonsense and sometimes they get mad when you tune them out. Women are also more sensitive. I can tell my guy friends to shut up and can be perfectly blunt without offending them, but my female friends aren't nearly as resilient. They are just wired differently, that's all, but I don't see how women are vile or awful though
I posted this link on a thread that got vanished a week or so ago. Read the article if you haven't already; it's eye-opening! One of the men in the article told a story about when his daughter told him she'd been raped. His response was to threaten to disown her if she pressed charges.
What can I say, other than clearly these are princes among men. Fortunately, I don't believe they are anything other than a "vocal minority." I'd be truly depressed if I thought most men were like that, but we know that's not truth, thankfully.
Tbh, I can kind of relate to that. If it wasn't for sex and the fact that I find women so tantalizing I wouldn't hang out with them. With my guy friends we go out, do something and BS around, but with my girl friends they talk and talk and talk, often about nonsense and sometimes they get mad when you tune them out. Women are also more sensitive. I can tell my guy friends to shut up and can be perfectly blunt without offending them, but my female friends aren't nearly as resilient. They are just wired differently, that's all, but I don't see how women are vile or awful though
We all need variety in our lives, and always hanging out with those who are just like us would get boring. Taking sex out of the equation, difference is good, and as you say, we're wired differently. We'll always find value and enjoy each other's company. Just not all the time...
The difference between guys who like to hang out with the boys (and women who like hanging out with the girls) is that, like you say, we don't regard the "other side" as awful and vile. We don't look at it as "us vs. them" and aren't plotting to get stuff from the "other side," which is, of course, our adversary. Unfortunately, that seems to be largely how these MRA/MGTOW (and I'd guess, the angry radical feminist stereotype) view the opposite sex. What a sad way to view the world.
Except for the cases where the woman gets taken to the cleaners in divorce, not to mention all the cases where they divvy everything up equitably, or the woman just walks, because she wants it to be over ASAP, and doesn't care about settlement.
Yeah I'm sure that happens a lot. You wouldn't have a bridge to sell me would you....
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Fortunately, I don't believe they are anything other than a "vocal minority." I'd be truly depressed if I thought most men were like that, but we know that's not truth, thankfully.
