Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
too many random negative variables at play for randomly approaching women. ive always got too much to do. you can say im making excuses, and id have to say you were right. I tried it a few times when I was younger in the supermarket. disastrous results. I hate public places like the supermarket, so im never in a good mood when I have to shop(WTF eggs went up another 38 cents). I also have bad teeth and the male version of a BRF. plus when I smile, I reveal a mouth full of metal. I know there are chicks out there that dig metalheads, but im not sure that's the right definition.
I do have women approach me, but those are usually the strung out crack fiends asking for money. gotta love this town.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stephy0519
I'm a firm believer on don't judge someone (at least, try as best as you can not to) until you can walk in their shoes.
49er...I think you're a decent guy. I really and truly do BUT....you have to admit there is a lot of anger in your posts, and you change your views and how you feel at the drop of a dime.
You can't use those three women to represent women as a whole. You just can't. I understand you are frustrated but dating is a trial and error process. That's the part that you don't really seem to grasp. You're going to have numerous break ups and heart breaks if you seek out love. It's just the way it is. Even the laid back cute types can/will ********* over.
It's an individual thing, not a gender thing.
If I come off as angry and bitter towards women, I apologize because I'm not. Yes, I was frustrated after my ex left that I stopped dating and stopped asking women out. Some days I ask myself "What am I doing wrong?"
Don’t confuse resentment with simply stating a fact. Would saying that certain country in the world has a better system make someone resentful? Nope, its just an opinion. No need to read between lines or too deep on a simple comment.
I don’t remember saying that men SHOULD NOT date attractive women. I’ve dated them and so far I’ve had good experiences. Funny thing is that they did have lots to pick and choose from and even got hit on while dating me. I have said attractive women do have more to pick and choose from though.
I'm not refuting that. But unattractive women, or moderately attractive women, can have choices, too. Those women want men of substance, as well.
So do attractive women.
Having choices does not mean that we are undateable. If you read the posts, it's not about attractive women having "too many choices", it's that we get by easy, we think men should ONLY take initiative and we think this... We act like this.. People treat us like that..
No.
But saying you won't date attractive women, only women who are "okay" looking, because attractive women exhibit poor character, is bitterness. Point blank. Any type of resentment for a group of people, because of your experience, is bitterness.
I'm not saying you've said it, or anything, but it has been said.
If I come off as angry and bitter towards women, I apologize because I'm not. Yes, I was frustrated after my ex left that I stopped dating and stopped asking women out. Some days I ask myself "What am I doing wrong?"
That is totally understandable.
It's just these beliefs of yours are going to cause problems for you later. It will hinder you from appreciating relationships for what they are, and when the right girl does come along you may dismiss her because you won't let those false views go. I know it seems like I'm picking on you but I really just want you to open your eyes and see the reality.
My experiences with the opposite sex haven't been the best either, I never even been in a relationship myself, the guys I liked just never reciprocated. After a while I became angry, depressed, and bitter but after some self reflection and thinking I realized I had to let it go. I can't imagine what my life would be like if I continued to think of men the way I did. I thought they were all liars and players but that's not true.
What I'm saying is...you have to relax and see women/people in general for who they are. Everyone is different.
It's just these beliefs of yours are going to cause problems for you later. It will hinder you from appreciating relationships for what they are, and when the right girl does come along you may dismiss her because you won't let those false views go. I know it seems like I'm picking on you but I really just want you to open your eyes and see the reality.
My experiences with the opposite sex haven't been the best either, I never even been in a relationship myself, the guys I liked just never reciprocated. After a while I became angry, depressed, and bitter but after some self reflection and thinking I realized I had to let it go. I can't imagine what my life would be like if I continued to think of men the way I did. I thought they were all liars and players but that's not true.
What I'm saying is...you have to relax and see women/people in general for who they are. Everyone is different.
You're right. I haven't asked a woman out in over two weeks. Since then, I see women as human beings since I'm not trying to have sex with them. But I still think attractive women have it easier in life and have more choices.
You're right. I haven't asked a woman out in over two weeks. Since then, I see women as human beings since I'm not trying to have sex with them. But I still think attractive women have it easier in life and have more choices.
Well, if you attract really good-looking women, then you're probably an attractive guy, too. You have choices. You're probably not a shi**y person, either.
You just have to get to know people. Don't let a few bad experiences spoil all the fun.
I'm not refuting that. But unattractive women, or moderately attractive women, can have choices, too. Those women want men of substance, as well. So do attractive women.
Yes, even non-model-looking women will have where to pick and choose from. Maybe less than a hot woman though. We all want a partner of substance regardless of our backgrounds. You also have superficial men out there who just want to get laid or women who just want a personal ATM and freebies.
Quote:
Having choices does not mean that we are undateable
I’ve can be proof of that as I have not only dated a few who can be considered hot/attractive but I have one by myside for the last 2 or so years and we are both happy together. Now, why do I consider them hot/attractive? Because while I have been interested in them I’ve seen more than a couple of guys also try to go out with them and even hit on her while going out with me. Still, it wouldn’t really matter if other guys would hit on her or not while with me. If I find her attractive and nice to be with that’s all that matters. Not only is she hot/attractive but also when we met she had this top position in a Forbes 500 company while I was simply a foreign exchange student in her country that got around in a bicycle. Still, she wanted to be with me just like I wanted to be with her. Regardless of her economic status compared to mine, her being attractive, etc. She still really took initiative to go out with me unlike what I saw when I live in the USA or when I work there. Which is not necessarily a bad thing but just different as that seems to work for women in the USA.
Quote:
But saying you won't date attractive women, only women who are "okay" looking, because attractive women exhibit poor character, is bitterness. Point blank. Any type of resentment for a group of people, because of your experience, is bitterness
To hear women say that they won’t ever take initiative to approach a guy, ask his number, ask him out, pay for his expenses since date 1, etc. for all kinds of reason can also seem bitter or a feeling of “I am the queen so bow before me.”
Like I’ve said, my experiences have not been that bad. I’ve share them before.
The same way a guy might think "I won't approach her. She might think I just want sex" there are girls may not approach a hot young nice rich guy thinking "Maybe he will think all I want is his money and to ride his cool flashy expensive car." That is, if a girl dared herself to take the initiative to approach him, ask for his number, ask him out, pay for his dinner, etc. which we know its just not that common at all.
Hot women are playing life on easy mode. I don't believe they have it hard at all. If they say they do, they're lying. That's what I truly believe. Hard for me to feel bad for them.
Well, then. Everything you say on these threads are lies, too. Your ex that broke up with you to go back to her husband? I'm not buying it. There's another reason she broke things off with you. Hard for me to feel bad for you.
There. How do you like it?
WHY on earth would women lie about having bad experiences in dating? Am I missing something?
If women have dating so easy, wouldn't we all be out and about being adored and spoiled by fabulous men? We'd be spending far less time (or no time) on CD, I can tell you that for sure.
I, for one, would LOVE to be able to sit here and type about my fabulous dating life; I really, really would, but I can't. And it was much the same when I did the dating thing back in my early 20s. So, believe me, youth in no way guarantees a great love life for women, either, no matter how attractive they may be.
Last edited by newdixiegirl; 04-17-2015 at 01:15 PM..
You're right. I haven't asked a woman out in over two weeks. Since then, I see women as human beings since I'm not trying to have sex with them. But I still think attractive women have it easier in life and have more choices.
Attractive men have an advantage, smarter people have an advantage, wealthy people have an advantage, certain ethnicities have an advantage. Nobody is denying this, but everyone has their own battles. No one escapes this life untouched by struggle. What I'm saying is you're a young dude with plenty to look forward to, let the resentment go. If you do this, you will most likely find a good woman (beautiful or not so).
Getting back to the Op, do most agree with it or is it inaccurate?
As a reasonably nice looking female myself (where I hang out) I get a lot of male attention.
As I'm aging however I am looking for something REAL.
The connection between two souls, looks aside....now THAT is worth waiting for.
Oh and, it may come in any sort of package. I'm old enough now not to judge a book by its cover and I don't give a rats how much money he has, how smooth he is, how many women hes got chasing after him.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
). I also have bad teeth and the male version of a BRF. plus when I smile, I reveal a mouth full of metal. I know there are chicks out there that dig metalheads, but im not sure that's the right definition.
