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Lucky you. Remember to keep good records of everything you do in case he dumps you for someone else once his degree program is over. It's one of the few ways a woman can receive alimony after a divorce.
Otherwise, you need to stop doing the chores that you think he should be helping with until he notices.
Or-- simply have a civil discussion about what's going on and help him to understand you need more help from him.
Been there. I worked while the Mr. finished school, and now it's my turn to finish. It was easier when he was in school because it was just the two of us, but now we have 3 kids so it's a lot more chaotic. Only advice I can offer is to simplify the housework as much as possible: use paper plates, do quick clean-ups each night (keeps clutter from piling up), don't keep score over who does what.
It sounds like my childhood. My mom worked full time while my dad finished his 4-year degree. They're still married 30 year later, if that's what you are worried about.
Your husband's schedule is more flexible than yours. Insist that he help more around the house or else relax your standards. And do not just wait until he finishes the program to have kids. WAIT until he has a paying job.
buy this book and leave it on hubbies nightstand...little reminder of what shouldn't but can happen if you use someone and discard them like garbage after your done...
I didn't put my wife through school, she paid for it, but I supported her and took care of the household...she is a lawyer now
I know that sometimes this "situation" can be far too uncommon. But I'm finding that sometimes it happens within the circles I run with. I'm a graduate student getting my Master's in Education & a full-time schoolteacher as well & my husband is currently pursuing his Associate's as a PTA (Physical Therapist Assistant). It is a 2 year program. He has always done shift jobs & is a hard worker, but he is very focused & has become a full time student in the past year. We have been married going on three years, but it has been a journey this year b/c he became a full-time student.
We saved enough money for him to go to school full-time, but I will admit that it is difficult living on one-income, we live in a small apartment, so we do pay rent, etc.
We have downsized, (decided against getting a dog, cut out small roadtrips/local vacations) He has insisted on working weekends, but really I have been the one to encourage him to go full-time so he can finish faster. He is appreciative & NOT a moocher at all.
Furthermore, I am sometimes so exhausted b/c I do all the cooking, cleaning, (he cleans the bathroom), not to mention working & going to class twice a night. We don't have children yet, but we are thinking of trying when he is in the program. I am 26, almost 27 years old. He is in his mid-30s.
Can any other ladies relate?
PS-I'm sorry if there is already a thread on this matter.
I'm lucky my husband does house chores and does it better than me too. He cooks and bakes too. LOL. He really is a gem. Compared to his loser bro that lives with us. I told him one of the BAJILLION reasons why I don't want his bro living with us is that he is not as neat as my husband. OMG. I can't believe how lucky I am really.
As to your situation. I don't know why you opposed to him working weekends since he does not do anything around the house then make him help you with bills or even pay part of his tuition from his weekend job. I don't get it. Why did you agree for him to go full time then complain here that he does not share household chores? Why don't you talk to him instead of us strangers?
buy this book and leave it on hubbies nightstand...little reminder of what shouldn't but can happen if you use someone and discard them like garbage after your done...
I didn't put my wife through school, she paid for it, but I supported her and took care of the household...she is a lawyer now
Whoa, whoa whoa...for the posters who are saying that he doesn't contribute...we have saved enough $ for him to be ok, but all I was doing was venting that he typically does not do a lot of the housework...(that has been my fault) but he is NOT a bad man.
I am by no means a Betty Broderick & he isn't an ungrateful type either. I can't see that situation happening b/c he won't be going to get a Master's/Law Degree/Medical Degree. Anyway, yes I am semi defensive LOL.
I mainly wanted to hear positive stories from women who have put their husbands through school bc I am in my mid 20s & many of my friends are either single & wouldn't put their man through school or married & comfortable/not having to put their husbands through school. Just wanted to clear that up.
Whoa, whoa whoa...for the posters who are saying that he doesn't contribute...we have saved enough $ for him to be ok, but all I was doing was venting that he typically does not do a lot of the housework...(that has been my fault) but he is NOT a bad man.
As long as he isn't still complaining about everything and throwing tantrums when things don't go his way ....
I wouldn't marry someone who isn't finished with their education and solidly into their career. Then no one has to put anyone else through school.
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