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That's definitely a reasonable explanation for ghosting on someone.
Damn dude, calm down. Her reason is valid. I also do background checks on people before dating them and would do the same thing.
It's o.k., crazy people usually understand each other, or they get ghosted
Thanks though!
I'm not aware of this dynamic you speak of. I think in a way I would probably prefer the ghosting vs the other.
At least with ghosting at some point you sorta figure it out and don't have to hear that you "pretty much suck and I'm not interested in you speech." Although it's wrapped up a little more pleasant than that, but that's really what it means at the end of the day.
I am the same. I would prefer someone just ghost me. Because I can easily take that hint. And it's less awkward for everyone involved. But then again, I have been very coldly rejected on a few occasions. So maybe I would feel differently if it were a polite respectful approach. lol
I have ghosted. And have been ghosted on. But it depends on the person. Some can't and when you explain yourself, they want to make a scene and / or argue with everything you have to say. So the more crazy, or stubborn argumentative people, I may be inclined to ghost on.
I never saw it as a big deal. Some will see anything as cowardly, so no biggie. If you tell someone on the phone you're not interested, it's considered cowardly.
Last edited by HappyRain; 08-08-2016 at 12:52 AM..
Location: Somewhere in a Field of Hopes and Dreams
596 posts, read 629,584 times
Reputation: 683
Quote:
Originally Posted by ratherbcrazycatlady
I've ghosted more than one person when I realized they were lying to me about something important. I don't feel like I should have to explain: "Well I figured out you were not being truthful so I don't want to move forward." I don't owe an explanation for that.
I also look up public access court records due to similar situations. One time it was just out of wanting to make sure this wasn't too good to be true, and found domestic violence, more than once actually and as serious as assault by strangulation. After making these kind of startling discoveries, it's difficult NOT to check everyone out so as not to be in that situation unaware.
Some situations just don't call for an explanation, and I'd rather not have someone try to convince me otherwise, when I've already made up my mind, why do I owe courtesy if someone hasn't been truthful?
Sorry doing background checks is just nutty and stalkerish.
Location: Somewhere in a Field of Hopes and Dreams
596 posts, read 629,584 times
Reputation: 683
Quote:
Originally Posted by ItsRick24
Sorry, but ghosting is a chicken****, childish act, regardless if the gal or guy does it!!!
Maybe I'm just one of the small few, but if a woman says, "Thanks but no thanks", I walk and not look back. I will at least thank her for her honesty.
Exactly. To me the peoplr who argue for it are just too **** scared and or self absorbed to care about the other person involved. Now if it is one date or the person seems crazy, sure I csn see ehy you would rather ghost than risk confrontation but in general, once you start having another person's feelings involved it is just polite to end it on diplomatic terms. Ignoring the person is just cold and it can leave with an array of questions as to what happened or falsehope, ehich is why my direct responsr to him i ASSUMED eould work but I guess I need to ghost him lol
But anyway, I am on my 3rd guy who has done this. I have told them "I am sorry but I just am not interested," and they will give it a few weeks and then BAM send me a stream of text, as if I did not tell them before how I was not interested.
I have never experienced this.
Ghosting is rude and I despise it.
I actually wish I would be told why I get rejected. It would make me feel better. I have been with a guy on a few dates and then I told him my birth date and he said his ex was a scorpio and he cannot deal with another. Okay . I can deal with that. If he would have just ghosted I would wonder what I did wrong and overanalyze.
Exactly. To me the peoplr who argue for it are just too **** scared and or self absorbed to care about the other person involved. Now if it is one date or the person seems crazy, sure I csn see ehy you would rather ghost than risk confrontation but in general, once you start having another person's feelings involved it is just polite to end it on diplomatic terms. Ignoring the person is just cold and it can leave with an array of questions as to what happened or falsehope, ehich is why my direct responsr to him i ASSUMED eould work but I guess I need to ghost him lol
Okay, but...why be mad? Assume you dodged a bad relationship (bad for you) and move on. Not everyone does this perfectly. As for false hope and so on, how much hope could you have invested by that point??? Unless you're saying you had a full-on many months long relationship and the person suddenly fell off the face of the earth, in which case you'd probably be filing a report...but otherwise, if you're getting that invested that early on...that much is on you, I'm sorry to say.
Assume any new person you don't know well is just that - someone who's new and whom you don't know well. Don't put your heart into it when you don't even really know this person yet, and after a few weeks or a month or two or three, you don't.
LOL... really? I guess I'm parsing words a bit much here, but disgusting is what our current political race is, some dude not returning your calls???? Disgusting??? LOL...
Lol, some people prefer to just ghost away, because they expect too much drama, and not a clean cut, like ghosting gives.
Many people who are let go do not let it be and say.."ok, good luck to you and have a nice life." some want to know the reason,.... "tell me ..."why, why, why...!" they ask for THE reason, and cannot let go and some get quite stalkerish.
Okay, but...why be mad? Assume you dodged a bad relationship (bad for you) and move on. Not everyone does this perfectly. As for false hope and so on, how much hope could you have invested by that point??? Unless you're saying you had a full-on many months long relationship and the person suddenly fell off the face of the earth, in which case you'd probably be filing a report...but otherwise, if you're getting that invested that early on...that much is on you, I'm sorry to say.
Assume any new person you don't know well is just that - someone who's new and whom you don't know well. Don't put your heart into it when you don't even really know this person yet, and after a few weeks or a month or two or three, you don't.
The OP is way madder than the subject matter would dictate.
I almost wish I could somehow ghost her just to get more of a rise out of her. LOL...
People need to calm the F down a bit... some dude not calling you back isn't the end of the damn world...jezus people.....
Sorry doing background checks is just nutty and stalkerish.
Yes, what was I thinking...I should get into a situation alone with someone who has a history of domestic violence. Maybe invite a registered sex offender over, because he says he doesn't like going out...or maybe the guy who says 'bars are for losers' can't actually enter establishments that serve alcohol due to being on probation.
I wouldn't want to feel 'stalkerish' even if it means discovering his last gf has a restraining order, or 'nutty'. Yes, that's the worst possible outcome, feeling nutty.
The OP is way madder than the subject matter would dictate.
I almost wish I could somehow ghost her just to get more of a rise out of her. LOL...
People need to calm the F down a bit... some dude not calling you back isn't the end of the damn world...jezus people.....
I've been told women handle rejection worse than men do. I think that is why some tend to overreact when a guy isn't interested in them.
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. I can deal with that. If he would have just ghosted I would wonder what I did wrong and overanalyze.
