Benefits of Marriage (husband, young, calling, divorce)
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A way to flip it would be that that couple "chose" to be together all that time when in reality they could have left easier when times got tough, like they always do in a LTR/marriage, at least with less legal entanglements and want to stay together as opposed to some "duty" to that marriage sorta implies.
Someone once said that to me and it resonated on some level.
And that's why I acknowledge how irrational it is: marriage doesn't enforce good behavior or require people to stay together, so why would it bother me so much? I really don't know.
And that's why I acknowledge how irrational it is: marriage doesn't enforce good behavior or require people to stay together, so why would it bother me so much? I really don't know.
Because we believe that if a man is really into us, he'll put a ring to it. It's true most of the time though. The same with us. At this point in my life, marriage or not doesn't mean much to me, but if I'm really into someone, I wouldn't be scared to marry him (if that's what he wants).
I like being married, but it isn't a goal of mine. I can love, be faithful, and committed with or with a marriage license.
I like the idea that a man would stand up with me and vow to work together as a couple. Would I nag him or consider it a deal-breaker? No, but I would eventually want to know what his plan is. (I'm not even sure what I mean by that, because I was going to say that I'd want his reassurance that he loves me, but I should already know that. * shrugging *)
And that's why I acknowledge how irrational it is: marriage doesn't enforce good behavior or require people to stay together, so why would it bother me so much? I really don't know.
LOL, love is irrational. "It is only a fool that looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart." So eloquently put by Ulysses Everett from O Brother, Where Art Thou.
Quote:
Originally Posted by metamorphosis
I like being married, but it isn't a goal of mine. I can love, be faithful, and committed with or with a marriage license.
I like the idea that a man would stand up with me and vow to work together as a couple. Would I nag him or consider it a deal-breaker? No, but I would eventually want to know what his plan is. (I'm not even sure what I mean by that, because I was going to say that I'd want his reassurance that he loves me, but I should already know that. * shrugging *)
I get this and it makes sense. I've never said I was against marriage really, for those that put a higher value on it it's all good with me. LOL.
I know couples who have been together 30+ years without getting married, so logically I understand that it's not necessary for a commitment. But I feel like marriage is a way of formally and legally declaring that you don't want to be with anyone else and want to build a life with that person; I think it would bother me on some level if my spouse didn't want to do that. I don't know why and it's probably irrational, but part of me would always wonder why he wouldn't want to take that next step.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ms.Mathlete
And that's why I acknowledge how irrational it is: marriage doesn't enforce good behavior or require people to stay together, so why would it bother me so much? I really don't know.
I would guess it bothers you in the same manner that a request for a prenup for marriage bothers others... nothing wrong with it.
I like being married, but it isn't a goal of mine. I can love, be faithful, and committed with or with a marriage license.
I like the idea that a man would stand up with me and vow to work together as a couple. Would I nag him or consider it a deal-breaker? No, but I would eventually want to know what his plan is. (I'm not even sure what I mean by that, because I was going to say that I'd want his reassurance that he loves me, but I should already know that. * shrugging *)
I think the marriage might be important to me because I have experienced getting attached and them walking out of my lives so many times. But marriage does not prevent that either. I just need to find the guy that can't live without me.
To be clear, and a dash fairer than my previous post suggested, I am only against marriage for me. The rest of you crazy star crossed kids can do as you please and good luck to you. Just don't invite me to the wedding .
My parents' marriage lasted eight years and they shouldn't have been together for eight minutes. Elsewhere I have only known two married couples in my life whose relationships I wouldn't consider unhealthy to the point of toxic. I am friends with all four people involved and wish them all the happiness in the world, but none of what I've seen makes me want to try their lives on for size.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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I think the only reasons that make sense to get married are if you are in the military, if you want kids, or if you are older far as SSN etc. I'm none of the three so there is no benefit as far as I'm concerned in considering marriage. It is just not for me.
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