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Ahh, No! Let it all hang out, warts and everything.
One thing I didn't realize about being yourself is that I needed to know myself first. I'm one of those people that aren't who they think they are. I've surprised myself too many times. In order for me to be myself, I had to do a lot of soul searching.
Interesting. In terms of looks I think most people don't really see themselves the way others see them. One is used to looking into the mirror every day, so one doesn't really notice changes that much.
In terms of personality, the only times I have surprised myself was when I did something I didn't know I had the courage to do. Usually when being forced to by challenging circumstances. But I am who I am, and I know who I am, I have never had surprises there. I have never found out that I am in any way the opposite of who I thought I was, only more of what I thought I was.
Good luck with your depressive spells, I hope it is not the pathological kind of depression.
Here's the thingio. There is not a lid for every pot. If your attitude is bitter, sulky, grumpy (in this example... there are lots of other bad attitudes to have) then there is a strong possibility that there is no lid for the pot (or pot for the lid). My uncle was "rejected" as a young man of like 25. The woman was kind and everything should have been fine. He remained bitter until he died at 82. He struggled to reconcile that his nieces were not spewing fire as all females do. He never found a pot.
Here's the thingio. There is not a lid for every pot. If your attitude is bitter, sulky, grumpy (in this example... there are lots of other bad attitudes to have) then there is a strong possibility that there is no lid for the pot (or pot for the lid). My uncle was "rejected" as a young man of like 25. The woman was kind and everything should have been fine. He remained bitter until he died at 82. He struggled to reconcile that his nieces were not spewing fire as all females do. He never found a pot.
Sorry, I see couples where at least one of the two people are "bitter, sulky, grumpy" if you may. Just because someone is alone does not mean there was no one for them.
You name the attitude and I will likely point out one with that attitude or combination that is in a relationship. Now, it does not mean that they are happy. But all types of people can get into a relationship. If it was true that everyone with a bad attitude or attitude combination will not have someone...
My interpretation of "lid for every pot" is that for every personality, there is at least one person who is going to put up with it. We're talking billions of people with different mindsets, levels of self esteem / worth, cultures, etc.
If you're unable to find someone, there are plenty of reasons, there being no one in the world for you is not one of them.
Some people may have to travel further to find a relationship. Again, this does not mean that it is going to be a happy and harmonious relationship, but it is a relationship nonetheless.
Here's the thingio. There is not a lid for every pot. If your attitude is bitter, sulky, grumpy (in this example... there are lots of other bad attitudes to have) then there is a strong possibility that there is no lid for the pot (or pot for the lid). My uncle was "rejected" as a young man of like 25. The woman was kind and everything should have been fine. He remained bitter until he died at 82. He struggled to reconcile that his nieces were not spewing fire as all females do. He never found a pot.
The pot needs to be open to meet the lid. Nobody will want the pot or even see him if he is hiding and not approachable. But with minimal effort (not being as grumpy), the pot should be able to find a lid who fits at least halfa$$ed. Lots of grumpy pots surprisingly have lids.
Interesting. In terms of looks I think most people don't really see themselves the way others see them. One is used to looking into the mirror every day, so one doesn't really notice changes that much.
In terms of personality, the only times I have surprised myself was when I did something I didn't know I had the courage to do. Usually when being forced to by challenging circumstances. But I am who I am, and I know who I am, I have never had surprises there. I have never found out that I am in any way the opposite of who I thought I was, only more of what I thought I was.
Good luck with your depressive spells, I hope it is not the pathological kind of depression.
Oh, I found out that I was a courageous tough guy with charms. I also recently found out that I was actually a good dancer.
The things that being raised by narcissistic people can do to you. I'm still in the process of unlearning all the things I've been told about me.
But as for me. It seems like I have two people living in me. On one hand, I am the worn out low energy person who struggles to lift a finger and would rather sit in solitude. Then I have days when I am a force to be reckoned with. They aren't numerous. Mostly my energy is very low. Dang it, I made it sound like I was bipolar.
Oh, I found out that I was a courageous tough guy with charms. I also recently found out that I was actually a good dancer.
The things that being raised by narcissistic people can do to you. I'm still in the process of unlearning all the things I've been told about me.
But as for me. It seems like I have two people living in me. On one hand, I am the worn out low energy person who struggles to lift a finger and would rather sit in solitude. Then I have days when I am a force to be reckoned with. They aren't numerous. Mostly my energy is very low. Dang it, I made it sound like I was bipolar.
Oh, I found out that I was a courageous tough guy with charms. I also recently found out that I was actually a good dancer.
The things that being raised by narcissistic people can do to you. I'm still in the process of unlearning all the things I've been told about me.
But as for me. It seems like I have two people living in me. On one hand, I am the worn out low energy person who struggles to lift a finger and would rather sit in solitude. Then I have days when I am a force to be reckoned with. They aren't numerous. Mostly my energy is very low. Dang it, I made it sound like I was bipolar.
Agree. My mother is a narcissist and I've been working to unlearn all those messages as well.
I think I have an iron deficiency too for the same reason, plus bruising easily lately. Hmm.
Isn't it kind of a weird question: Being yourself vs being attractive? Does that mean that someone should adopt a different personality when they meet someone in order to catch and keep them? How long can that ruse go on? I've always been a what you see is what you get kind of person. Why waste time being someone else when eventually you're going to turn back into you? If you're wearing x amount of make up, or clothing/shoes that you're uncomfortable with or pretending that you just can't live without going to the opera once a week only to impress, do you think that after some arbitrary time you can go back to being your real self and that won't have an effect on the relationship?
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