Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Do you prefer to be yourself just for the sake of it, even if that means you are less attractive or even unattractive to the other sex and thus more likely to stay single? Or do you try to cater to what the other sex considers attractive, violating your own tastes and principles?
For instance, I know that most women like men that are ambitious and successful (I think I read that it is in their genes, they don't choose to be that way), which in turn shows in certain ways (e.g. clothes, home).
The other way round, many men don't like women with short hair, or wearing makeup. Yet some women have boyish hair cuts or wear heavy makeup.
I thought about that topic when I was watching one of those dating reality TV shows last night and there were all those "ape-men" with their tattoos, earrings and muscles, and women liked that look. So, I was wondering if those vain men run around like that because they want to or because they know young women like that whole bad boy image. I personally just can't imagine myself that way, I am merely a good boy
Would you get a tattoo just because you know women (or maybe a particular woman you like) like that type of men?
Would you wear a suit instead of casual clothes just because you know you would come across as more successful and sophisticated?
Would you wear high heels just because you know many men think it's normal for women to wear them, although you don't like them yourself?
I suppose there are also cases where one does certain things that one thinks must be attractive to the other sex, but really aren't.
I found that being "attractive" didn't get me anywhere. So I chose to be myself whether I stay single or not. If you can't enjoy your company, you are probably going to have a miserable relationship with a significant other anyway.
I do what suits me. For instance, if I wanted to do what other people prefer, I'd get tattoos. I think I'm the last guy on the planet who has clear skin.
At first glance yes. Then again, when you look at it more thoroughly, don't we do most anything because we want to be appreciated by others? When I take care of my looks, I can tell myself that it is for myself, but I don't think that's the case. I don't even see anything above my shoulder line without a mirror, which I only spend a few minutes in front of per day, if at all. In my case it is more like 10 seconds to make sure I don't have toothpaste or other marks on my face before I leave home It is the feedback of others that boosts or diminishes people's self-esteem.
There is also the theory that people do certain things deliberately (albeit it without being aware of it), for instance women cutting their hair after a failed marriage in order to keep men away. Not sure if it is true...
Do you prefer to be yourself just for the sake of it, even if that means you are less attractive or even unattractive to the other sex and thus more likely to stay single?
I don't think people with many chronic illnesses or conditions really have this choice. Furthermore, do you really believe that people can hide themselves that well in order to be attractive to others? Most people have no idea how others see them; mainly they see in themselves what they think of themselves.
I have been fortunate in finding a "what you see is what you get" partner for the last 20 or so years.
two young single guys I know say they have much better chances of meeting woman when they wear suits or at least a sport coat and a tie. It alludes being successful.
I'm not really even sure what men like anymore. I wear what I feel best in.
I know if I'm uncomfortable, it makes me crabby. They probably don't like the crabby look.
Just do you, and be you. You'll more likely attract the right man.
This reminds me of once when I was home sick and a guy friend stopped by. I had done nothing with my hair and was not wearing any make up. He told me that he loved my hair that way, and that I looked amazing without make-up.
His remarks didn't change how I fix my face and hair on a normal day, but it did make me realize that it's not the end of the world to leave the house without makeup.
I do what makes me feel my best. That's all.
There is also the theory that people do certain things deliberately (albeit it without being aware of it), for instance women cutting their hair after a failed marriage in order to keep men away. Not sure if it is true...
Some women may do that. I have only seen it in movies, and only as an act of empowering themselves, changing from an old self to a new self, not to "keep men away." Again ... only in a fictional context.
I don't think people with many chronic illnesses or conditions really have this choice. Furthermore, do you really believe that people can hide themselves that well in order to be attractive to others? Most people have no idea how others see them; mainly they see in themselves what they think of themselves.
I have been fortunate in finding a "what you see is what you get" partner for the last 20 or so years.
Some things are pretty easy to change. For instance I like to shave, I am used to it, but occasionally when I had little time I left home with a little beard and people said I look better that way. I assume they only commented because I am almost always shaven.
So, should I prefer looking better and saving time, or continue to shave because I feel I look like a sleazy Mexican drug lord with a beard What's more important, the way I see myself or the way others see me?
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
It is the feedback of others that boosts or diminishes people's self-esteem. 