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Guys who are currently not cracking the "5" barrier actually have it easier than gals where this is true. A gal with a homely face can do whatever, but most guys won't want to date her. Much of a woman's appeal, at least to me, is pretty much hard wired in her genes. That ain't fair, but, life ain't fair.
Women have makeup at their disposal (which can pretty much transform their looks) and aren’t generally expected to approach, so I don’t see how they would have it harder. Also, I think an ugly girl who had a nice body and took care of herself would still be approached by guys. Maybe not the best looking ones but would probably still get approached nonetheless.
Lack of attraction, sure. But I've 'friend-zoned' many men for other reasons. Seen that they are bad boyfriends/cheaters/etc. or any type of trait that I don't find desirable in a mate.
Same here. Sometimes it is a compatibility issue that I can tolerate or overlook as a friend, but wouldn't want to sign up for in a relationship. For instance, how they manage their money, or how much they drink or smoke, or being a slob, or too OCD. Being too wishy-washy or being too opinionated. Or even if they use too much vulgar language. There could be hundreds of reasons why I might like someone as a person and a friend, but I would not want to seek anything beyond friendship.
Location: In the cold, dark wasteland of eternity...
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JBT1980
When you have a friend of the opposite sex you usually get along well and have a connection with that person have similliar interests etc
What makes a person who you connect with a potential person you could have a relationship with and not the friend?
Is it a lack of physical attraction? Something else? Both?
Gotta say JBT, just when I gave up on you, you end up making a thread with a valid question...wtf?
Well, obviously, the first thing is chem....(you know that as well as I do)....2nd thing is physical attraction (and I don't necessarily mean they gotta be ripped...if their face is attractive and sometimes sexy to ME, then it's ON...! )
Once those things are out of the way, then it all boils down to his personality: The way he carries himself, the way he treats other people (whether he's with me or not), the way he treats ME, if he's into at least some of the things I'm into (seriously though, if he's NOT into TWD, that could be a deal breaker, because I want my guy to be into that and watch it with me and so I can have someone to talk to about it besides my besties ), if he's respectful towards me and is loving, caring, affectionate, FAITHFUL and is FUN to be with....
All those things would help me to decide if he's someone I'd want to be in a LTR with ~
Same here. Sometimes it is a compatibility issue that I can tolerate or overlook as a friend, but wouldn't want to sign up for in a relationship. For instance, how they manage their money, or how much they drink or smoke, or being a slob, or too OCD. Being too wishy-washy or being too opinionated. Or even if they use too much vulgar language. There could be hundreds of reasons why I might like someone as a person and a friend, but I would not want to seek anything beyond friendship.
My sentiments exactly! There was one guy that was very much in love with me and would always ask why I wouldn't be in a relationship with him and I'm like dude you have cheated on every girlfriend you've had. While I know you love me but once you get comfortable in the relationship you're going to cheat and I'm not going to play myself into thinking otherwise. Then the fact that he was very irresponsible when it came to money and never held a job at one place for very long without changing career paths on a whim.
There are specific things I need in a partner that I will not waiver where as friendships aren't held in that same regard since I won't be combining assets, blinding families, etc. with a "friend"
The male friends I had that I tried to turn into lovers and ultimately failed was because they revealed weak personalities. They were selfish or scared or inattentive or insecure or mealy-mouthed once faced with a real live love interest.
There was a reason they were generally unsuccessful in relationships.
I would be hesitant to keep them as friends much less lovers.
Yes. If our magnets aren't trying to draw our bodies together, it's a friendship.
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) 
), if he's respectful towards me and is loving, caring, affectionate, FAITHFUL and is FUN to be with....
