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What counts as prospects? Attention from random people, or those interested, available, meets one's criteria and is otherwise compatible?
There are also many variables and factors that affect one's dating pool in daily life. Not everyone who takes an interest or approaches is available or strikes your fancy.
And no, "most" people who use dating sites to meet others aren't turning to it as a last resort. For some, it it simply a more efficient and effective way to meet available people who meet their preferences and criteria. There can be a larger pool of people and a more efficient way to narrow one's search.
I didn't lack in the area of attention or interest "in real life." Dating sites were simply a better and more efficient tool for meeting and screening potential matches.
I wouldn't say it's necessarily about lacking prospects. In OLD you are putting yourself out there, saying "Here is me! Looking for a date! Hello, men, I am single!!" In real life, you don't go around broadcasting to the world that you're single and looking.
It's one reason I laugh a little hearing people tell guys about "approaching" and trying to meet people literally anywhere, like at the grocery store. As outgoing as I am, and as many times as I've struck up conversations with strangers out and about, never has one of those conversations in general public life, led to exchanging information and a possibility of dating. Never.
But then, I can't imagine a friendly chat with a friendly stranger going to some of the places that OLD messages can almost immediately. A guy looking to get some does not expect that some friendly polite woman in line at the store will be receptive to a rude advance.
When women talk about getting lots of "attention" on OLD, many of the volumes of messages are either "Sup" or some other awkward attempt to open conversation, or rude and almost nasty sexual overtures. An intelligent attempt to open a polite and friendly conversation, is relatively rare there.
I would say that the more reasonable equivalent is:
Your typical message or star or like or whatever on OLD = Some guy "checking you out" (and trying to be discreet) with his eyes, in public.
I cannot speak much to real world meat markets like bars, because I never really did that sort of thing. The only time I've ever hung out in bars was when I was on a pool league, or at heavy metal concerts. Very different from dance clubs. But I imagine women there still get less attention than on OLD because at least some of the guys will be nervous or too shy to make face to face attempts.
This is what inspired me this question. I'm friendly with this girl, she's single, blessed with a lovely personality, and while she's not ugly she doesn't quite look like what someone would consider attractive by current standards. She is quiet and dresses conservatively, she rarely gets hit on by guys. The other day we were talking about how she is giving online dating a try. She had barely anything written in her profile, and had uploaded just one picture. Nonetheless, she told me than within 2 hours she had received 10 messages. She's receiving so many solicitations that she just can't keep up with it.
On the other hand, I'm a guy single as well, above average looking, and I can say that I rarely receive unsolicitated messages from girls, I get a reply in 1 out 5 messages sent out, when I'm lucky.
There are more thirsty dudes than thirsty women. An above average-looking woman will very likely receive more attention than her male counterpart.
And as the narrative goes, some of those above average looking and "thirsty" men will be shut out and some of them will message more average looking women. Granted, those men will likely be interested in something more casual with the average looking woman, but she still has a quite attractive man showing interest in her. She may accept his offer and meet, or she may just get a bit of a boost from the interest. Either way, her thoughts about the next average looking man who contacts her might be less favorable than they'd have been otherwise.
That's not a crime or even a problem in the strictest sense, but I think it's the basis for some men's complaints about OLD. In everyday life women typically still get more attention than men, but the numbers are a bit less skewed and men can also at least try to gain a woman's attention in some manner other than looking good. Even if he can't catch her eye, I think he feels some sense of efficacy in the effort. If a guy is a good writer with the right tone he can do some of that on OLD, but it seems like many men can barely write a complete sentence, or perhaps feel like doing so isn't masculine.
Location: In the cold, dark wasteland of eternity...
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iron_stick
This is what inspired me this question. I'm friendly with this girl, she's single, blessed with a lovely personality, and while she's not ugly she doesn't quite look like what someone would consider attractive by current standards. She is quiet and dresses conservatively, she rarely gets hit on by guys. The other day we were talking about how she is giving online dating a try. She had barely anything written in her profile, and had uploaded just one picture. Nonetheless, she told me than within 2 hours she had received 10 messages. She's receiving so many solicitations that she just can't keep up with it.
On the other hand, I'm a guy single as well, above average looking, and I can say that I rarely receive unsolicitated messages from girls, I get a reply in 1 out 5 messages sent out, when I'm lucky.
First of all, you're trying to date women, not girls, right?!
Second of all, YOU may think you're 'above average' looking, but apparently, the women you're targeting do not.
And, if you're getting 1 reply out of 5 messages you send, consider yourself extremely lucky! There are some guys on here who NEVER get replies out of the HUNDREDS of messages they send out...and the ones who DO get a reply, they say that those replies are from 'obese' or 'overweight' and 'ugly' women.
In answer to your question, most women (NOT girls) get more attention in general than guys do.
If you're as 'above average' in looks as you think you are and you're not getting as many replies as your gal friend is - who YOU say 'doesn't quite look like what someone would consider attractive by current standards' - then you best step up yo game.
Redo your profile or put up better pics than what you currently have. Honestly though, I get suspicious (and extremely turned off) when a guy says in a forum (or IRL) that he thinks he's 'above average' in looks. Maybe your arrogance, sense of entitlement and conceit is coming across in your profile, who knows?!
I just dated a girl I met on OLD. The same old story. She gets bombarded with e-mails from guys. Much different than most men report.
So it's very much a women's market in that regard. Why was she on it? She like most reported frustrations with it, but moved to a new area. She also is in a minority group.
So like most, it is to expand the options. For whatever reason, it seems there are much more men on the sites than women.
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Maybe your arrogance, sense of entitlement and conceit is coming across in your profile, who knows?! 
