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I was feeling discouraged yesterday but today I feel a lot better. I think the coffee date is not working and I'm maybe shooting for people who are a bit different than me.
I'm glad you're not as discouraged as yesterday.
I do think that, even though the internet and messaging works well for less social folks, online dating really doesn't because it has a LOT to do with selling yourself, which a lot of less socially assertive people are just not great at.
I hate to say it because it's one of those things that's out of one's control, but a 5'11" woman may not be a big deal on paper but in person it's a turn off for most men. That's my height, and I've never had more than a first date with a woman 5'8" or taller.
Alright, and that's fair. I appreciate your honesty. Why is it a turn off exactly?
I do think that, even though the internet and messaging works well for less social folks, online dating really doesn't because it has a LOT to do with selling yourself, which a lot of less socially assertive people are just not great at.
Definitely not my strength at all. Thanks I have another date planned for today and I'm feeling a lot better about it!
Alright, and that's fair. I appreciate your honesty. Why is it a turn off exactly?
Probably for the opposite reason short guys are generally a turn off for women. Asian women are generally very attractive to white men, but white woman in general are not attracted to asian men - it's got to do with height.
This is a long shot, but I'll throw it out there anyway. Could it be poor grooming, body odor or bad breath? I have a friend who's attractive, very bright, well-educated and a great conversationalist. She's divorced and has tried online dating, but with not much success. Guys are interested, take her out a time or two, and then they lose interest.
My friend doesn't know what the real problem is, but I think I do. I've noticed that she often has bad breath and isn't very good with dental hygiene. I've seen her with food between her teeth. Also, she doesn't bother with hair or makeup, doesn't wear any fragrance and wears baggy, shapeless clothing that sometimes has noticeable stains or needs pressing. She often looks like she just rolled out of bed and picked up whatever clothes were lying on the closet floor.
I love my friend dearly, but there's no way I could tell her any of this. Maybe the "no chemistry" response from all these different guys really means that something about your grooming or physical appearance is putting them off, but they're too polite to say so. It's just a guess, but I think anyone who's puzzled by lack of interest from the opposite sex should at least consider these issues as a possible cause.
I had to give the "no chemistry" spiel to a guy who had such horrible breath that I was wiping his kiss off the side of my face the minute I got in the car. Are people that dense that they don't keep some mints or gum on them on a date? That and he was really, really short, under 5'3".
Alright, and that's fair. I appreciate your honesty. Why is it a turn off exactly?
I know you didn't ask me, but I'll offer one experience.
We were walking from restaurant to bar and she very playfully shoved me. Unfortunately, given that we were nearly same height and weight (tall and little heavy), I stumbled a little, since I wasn't expecting it. It was only a nanosecond or two long, but I briefly felt manhandled. (didn't feel too sexy)
Probably for the opposite reason short guys are generally a turn off for women. Asian women are generally very attractive to white men, but white woman in general are not attracted to asian men - it's got to do with height.
I see. Well I'm not going to lose sleep over it, I like being tall.
I know you didn't ask me, but I'll offer one experience.
We were walking from restaurant to bar and she very playfully shoved me. Unfortunately, given that we were nearly same height and weight (tall and little heavy), I stumbled a little, since I wasn't expecting it. It was only a nanosecond or two long, but I briefly felt manhandled. (didn't feel too sexy)
That is fair, I guess maybe that's why I generally date guys 6'0 and above to avoid this kind of thing. As a tall woman I like feeling feminine too. Though dating a shorter guy isn't that big of a deal as long as they are OK with it.
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