Wife in Emotional and possibly Physical Relation with a Friend [MERGED]

[jencam]

Originally Posted by indca

Hello there Guys;
Thanks for your support and feedbacks I really do appreciate this.
As for my wife it seems she got used to venting at my cousin about our family and her work problems and my cousin was mirroring her expectation and beliefs; He had nothing to lose by agreeing with her; In return he said really negative stuff about his own wife and all of a sudden they both seemed to be in a bad marriages whose partner was not paying attention to them.

From my perspective; It seems I was living in a house with my Mom and Brother; so, I took more balanced approach and tried to show both positive and negative aspect of my Moms conservative View points and this created her to get that much aggressive and distant from me and closer to her AP; she was stuck in a bad situation and he was guiding her out of misery according to her.

I put this particular concern to my cousin last Year as I saw her pulling away from me; and his reply was to just let her go vent to him and he will guide her out of the Depression or negative thinking that she got herself into; Yet, what happened was the more he agreed and let her vent without stopping her, she started to idolize him and that made her fall in love with him; She said he is such a great listener and blamed me for being aggressive during our talks.

Was I wrong in trusting family friend? How to make her understand the dynamics which led to her getting attached to him? How do I give her assurance that our life will be OK without going to him? Any guidance regarding this?

Huh? She doesn't want a life with you w/o him. She wants him. What does it take for you to understand there is nothing you can do to convince her?

You either tolerate this open marriage that you have, sharing your wife with your cousin, or you leave.