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Manners is just about creating a comfortable social environment for everybody involved. So what you did was probably correct, particularly if she was holding the door open for you. Funny, but I've never really thought about my effect on a woman in a stairwell in that light.
Of course, on the other hand, if you're wearing business attire and it looks obvious that you're just schlepping your way to the car after another day in Cubicleland, then it begs the question of why on earth any non-neurotic woman would be afraid of you. I would think that, particularly in the environment of a dark parking garage, the presence of a non-threatening male would be a bit of comfort for a woman walking to her car.
Ladies, is my assumption right or wrong?
I think your assumption is wrong. Business attire, a tired look, and a brief case do not mean someone isn't a creep. They come in all varieties. (I just learned one of my favorite past coworkers is a child molester.) Blame the media if you want, but we're all barraged with horror stories about various crimes. I personally know women who've been raped, mugged, followed, etc., so I've their stories in the back of my mind. It makes you think the world is very unsafe. I grant you that the vast majority of people are completely normal, but you just can't tell the creeps from the rest that easily.
OP, I believe you've been doing the correct thing.
I would still be leary because one can never be too sure...heck, Ted Bundy would walk his female coworkers out to their cars at night in his khakis and sweater, always reminding them to "lock up when they get home"...
No one is exempt...Sorry...
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Originally Posted by cpg35223
Manners is just about creating a comfortable social environment for everybody involved. So what you did was probably correct, particularly if she was holding the door open for you. Funny, but I've never really thought about my effect on a woman in a stairwell in that light.
Of course, on the other hand, if you're wearing business attire and it looks obvious that you're just schlepping your way to the car after another day in Cubicleland, then it begs the question of why on earth any non-neurotic woman would be afraid of you. I would think that, particularly in the environment of a dark parking garage, the presence of a non-threatening male would be a bit of comfort for a woman walking to her car.
I agree with the others that you are doing the right thing by giving the ladies some safe "space" in the stairwell. Heck, if it were me, I probably would head back up the stairs feigning a forgotten item, so that I'd not have you behind me!
Manners is just about creating a comfortable social environment for everybody involved. So what you did was probably correct, particularly if she was holding the door open for you. Funny, but I've never really thought about my effect on a woman in a stairwell in that light.
Of course, on the other hand, if you're wearing business attire and it looks obvious that you're just schlepping your way to the car after another day in Cubicleland, then it begs the question of why on earth any non-neurotic woman would be afraid of you. I would think that, particularly in the environment of a dark parking garage, the presence of a non-threatening male would be a bit of comfort for a woman walking to her car.
Ladies, is my assumption right or wrong?
Unfortunately, times what they are, there is no such thing as a "non-threatening male" in a dark parking garage, unless you already know them.
It is terrible how paranoid we can be sometimes, but not without reason.
It is sad we have to fear others.
Quote:
Of course, on the other hand, if you're wearing business attire and it looks obvious that you're just schlepping your way to the car after another day in Cubicleland, then it begs the question of why on earth any non-neurotic woman would be afraid of you
Looks can be deceiving. This reminds me of a incident my brother and a friend were in. They were young in the mid '80's hanging out at the mall wearing leather jackets and sporting their new ear ring and tatoo. There was an elderly lady having car trouble and they approched her to see if they could get her car started. She immediately got in the car, rolled up the window and locked the doors. They tried to explain they just wanted to help, but that made her more frightened so they left.
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