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My last two relationships we had a very healthy sex life. If I were to base it on sex alone I would still be with either one but that just wasn't the case. The first lasted 3 years and the second 7 years. So I don't beleive that sex can make or break a relationship. Just cause you can be compatible sexually with a person doesn't mean you can be compatible in all other areas. Don't get me wrong I think sex is very important. I couldn't be with a man I couldn't have ahealthy relationship with nor could I be with a man that i wasn't compatible with in at least some other areas as well.
I guess that is somewhere around the point.
We should try to pick spouses that have qualities that we find attractive and admirable and that will last way into old age.
What I found attractive sexually as a teen is not what I am attracted to now.
But intelligence, kindness, the willingness to give and take, reliability, same taste in things, temperament, sense of humor - these things tend to stay with us longer.
And, I don't think society should consider that a relationship is lousy if people don't have sex. And if one partner does not want sex they should not be thought of as errant because of it.
This would not be a problem at all if the sex drive we first has stayed with us forever. But it changes.
It's like I admire intelligence and if my partner developed Alzheimers, heaven forbid. I would not make a claim to divorce because I considered the partner's brain part of the deal in marriage.
I would not bring the partner to counselors or put them through a guilt trip.
I know this is a poor example because changing sex drive seems to be so frequent and common that it can be considered normal, and Alzhiemers is a definate disorder.
I guess that is somewhere around the point.
We should try to pick spouses that have qualities that we find attractive and admirable and that will last way into old age.
What I found attractive sexually as a teen is not what I am attracted to now.
But intelligence, kindness, the willingness to give and take, reliability, same taste in things, temperament, sense of humor - these things tend to stay with us longer.
And, I don't think society should consider that a relationship is lousy if people don't have sex. And if one partner does not want sex they should not be thought of as errant because of it.
This would not be a problem at all if the sex drive we first has stayed with us forever. But it changes.
It's like I admire intelligence and if my partner developed Alzheimers, heaven forbid. I would not make a claim to divorce because I considered the partner's brain part of the deal in marriage.
I would not bring the partner to counselors or put them through a guilt trip.
I know this is a poor example because changing sex drive seems to be so frequent and common that it can be considered normal, and Alzhiemers is a definate disorder.
Beleive it or not I agree with you on this. My dad and stepmom have been toghether for 22 years now and they don't have sex but maybe once a year. He is 57 she is 44 both are good looking people..make good money have financial security.beautiful home..you name it..and to them sex just isn't important anymore. They are totally in love and extremely compatible and just feel they don't want or need it that often at all. So I don't beleive sex is important to every couple.
At my age I'm not so sure I could stay with a man that didn't desire me. I think this has to be in agreement with both parties. Cause I myself don't think I could stay with a man that chose not to have sex with me. I'm lucky that I have never been faced with that and hope I don't have to be cause I honestly don't think I could stay. To me and this is just my opionion, I think sex in a relationship is very important for me not the most important but nonetheless important.
You wrote a whole lot after this sentence, all in the intention of backing your point. I could argue point for point, but why? It's simple. Sex is not important to you, whether within marriage or outside of it. I disagree strongly. I believe it is very important in marriage. If you don't think so, good for you. If the (usually female) partner didn't want sex to be a part of her marriage down the road, she shouldn't have gotten married.
IYHO
I agree. In fact, this is not a reason to get married. But sex is, or should be, an integral part of a marriage once a couple decides to get married.
Get outta here. Really?
Yes, that is the point. What I am against is that person who changes down the road.
I have never been intimidated by any woman. I prefer the sexually demanding type, actually. And since I am not trying to not be exclusively available to that woman, I expect her to be exclusively available to me. That is only fair.
Actually, it's both the woman's obligation and the man's obligation.
I have never "experimented" sexually with another female. LOL. I am bisexual but the only thing I've ever done was kiss a girl I liked. And that was a quick, small kiss back in high school. I'm not into the whole "girls kissing girls is fun and cool" thing. It really actually upsets me when people do that. It belittles those who sincerely want a relationship or experience with someone of the same sex. I thought that if I ever had a girlfriend, I'd wait a long time to have sex with her. Sex is just too big of a deal for me. Makes no difference if they are male or female. Either way, I am married and he's been my only sexual partner. I suppose that says it all
I never have, although I have very close friends who are lesbians- some have been friends for decades. There have been times when men have made me so crazy that I wished I could, however!
Women just don't blow my skirt up, if you know what I mean.
I dated a lesbian for 3 years and after those dated both her & her g/f both, sometimes simultaniously.
For a bout 2 years we actually tried swinging, but often only as a group, never individually.
As far as past comments, a person can be bi-courious and not homo... thinking otherwise is homophobic.
I tried out being bi only per the two girls and otherwise never had interest.
Sexually as long as we were sexually open, things were fine.
The relationships with them worked as long as everything was full tilt open & honest.
Ie: per swinging, I have tried it all at least once...
Beleive it or not I agree with you on this. My dad and stepmom have been toghether for 22 years now and they don't have sex but maybe once a year. He is 57 she is 44 both are good looking people..make good money have financial security.beautiful home..you name it..and to them sex just isn't important anymore. They are totally in love and extremely compatible and just feel they don't want or need it that often at all. So I don't beleive sex is important to every couple.
At my age I'm not so sure I could stay with a man that didn't desire me. I think this has to be in agreement with both parties. Cause I myself don't think I could stay with a man that chose not to have sex with me. I'm lucky that I have never been faced with that and hope I don't have to be cause I honestly don't think I could stay. To me and this is just my opionion, I think sex in a relationship is very important for me not the most important but nonetheless important.
And your parents discuss their sex life with you or do you just assume mom and pop aint at it like rabbits. If your mum is only 44 you must be quite a young gal yourself so maybe assume "old folks" don't bonk.
44 and 57 is way too young to stop having sex...sure daddy aint gettin' it anywhere else?
This is true. I DO NOT fear homos. I dont really give a rats A** what you guys do to each other. I just think its disgusting. Disgust does not equal fear. And by the way. As I am just a regular all American boy, I LOVES ME SOME LESBIANS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So you're saying you'd watch me muff diving with another woman and you'd be fine with that, but you wouldn't be able to watch two men making love?
That's a double standard and you know it is
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