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Because dating can lead to something more serious before you're ready? What if you're dating someone and they develop strong feelings for you but you're not ready for that yet because you're still hung up on someone else? I've always viewed dating as a time when you're looking for potential - for something that could develop into something serious down the road. I never saw the point of dating for the sake of dating when it's not going anywhere.
"Dating" someone is the age-old courtship game. If the relationship doesn't produce something more where both parties are concerned then it's ended. It's the opportunity to get to know someone better, not necessarily a prenuptial exercise.
I said nothing nor intimated anything about "dating for the sake of dating". You date someone because you feel you have something in common with that person. If one turns out to have strong feelings for the other which aren't reciprocated then that's that, no? I'll repeat, when did simply "dating" become so serious?
"Dating" someone is the age-old courtship game. If the relationship doesn't produce something more where both parties are concerned then it's ended. It's the opportunity to get to know someone better, not necessarily a prenuptial exercise.
I said nothing nor intimated anything about "dating for the sake of dating". You date someone because you feel you have something in common with that person. If one turns out to have strong feelings for the other which aren't reciprocated then that's that, no? I'll repeat, when did simply "dating" become so serious?
But when you know you still have feelings for someone else, you already know that dating is going nowhere (it's not going to go anywhere until you're over the other person) - hence the fact that you're dating just for the sake of dating.
in my opinion, you shouldn't date if you are in love with another. Wait until you have moved on. You can't be emotionally available to someone else until you have done this. You might have all the physical stuff but until you either fill the void or move on, you can't be a good dating candidate.
But when you know you still have feelings for someone else, you already know that dating is going nowhere (it's not going to go anywhere until you're over the other person) - hence the fact that you're dating just for the sake of dating.
Oh dear, I see my point is still being missed. I must be so damned old-school that I have one foot in the bloody grave already.
Let me try and put it simply. More simply.
A date is a date is a date. A date is something you do when you ask someone to accompany you somewhere because you know that you and that person share at least something in common. Maybe you both like a certain ethnic food, certain kinds of movies, theatre, symphony, rock, blues, jazz,opera, sports, swimming, architecture, books, poetry readings - ANYTHING under the sun. That sort of "likeness" can be established either in a social setting when you're just casually chit-chatting or even via the internet.
A simple date isn't a prenuptial dance unless that's your intent. It's a way of enjoying somebody's company who just happens to like something that YOU like. It can be Scottish bagpipe-playing or the polka for all I care but it's not a prenuptial scenario. It's simply getting to know someone a little better.
How the heck can you possibly know whether that "date" is going to turn into something more, segue to a simply great friendship or end in total disaster unless you give it a try.
So WHAT if your moribund heart is involved in the fantasy of being smitten by someone completely unattainable? You're going to hide in a box until your heart heals (getting out of that box can take years) or get on with real life which might make you realize that life is for the living and there are other opportunities out there?
No, you're not dating for the sake of dating (whatever that means and whatever is your interpretation of "dating".) You're dating because you enjoy the company of someone who has an interest similar to yours.
If the mutual interest doesn't do it and the date turns you off with rank body odor, facial tics, basic sloppiness, etc, (which, I might add you would find out much faster if you'd met via friends or whatever in a social setting and not over the internet) then so be it.
I think this is the third time I've said it now - when did a simple date become so damned serious? Anybody have the year so I can enter it in my journal?
I think this is the third time I've said it now - when did a simple date become so damned serious? Anybody have the year so I can enter it in my journal?
To some of us it's more serious because we resent the idea of “dating” so much. We don't find it fun at all. It's just a necessary evil occasionally.
You can enter the year of my birth in your journal if you'd like! If you were to know it that is...
Oh dear, I see my point is still being missed. I must be so damned old-school that I have one foot in the bloody grave already.
Let me try and put it simply. More simply.
Don't patronize me. We obviously simply feel differently about this. That doesn't make you right and me wrong. I understand quite clearly your point, I simply disagree. Do you understand THAT point or is it too difficult for you to comprehend that your opinion is NOT fact?
To some of us it's more serious because we resent the idea of “dating” so much. We don't find it fun at all. It's just a necessary evil occasionally.
You can enter the year of my birth in your journal if you'd like! If you were to know it that is...
Why do you see "dating" as such a very serious issue? Why do you see it as a "necessary evil" and "not fun""
If it's not "fun" to you or, worse, a "necessary evil" then obviously abstain from it. Where's the rub? Each to his own!
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