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If a person is in love with or has strong feelings for someone else, should he/she be dating other people? Is it fair to the other person?
For instance, you care deeply about someone you cannot be with - your ex wife/husband, someone who is married, someone who lives on another continent, someone who is just not interested/available. Should you try to date even though your heart belongs to someone else? Or should you date in order to try to get over the unavailable person? And is it fair to the other person you get involved with if you know you don't care about him/her the way you care about this other person?
In my opinion, you shouldn't date if you are in love with another. Wait until you have moved on. You can't be emotionally available to someone else until you have done this. You might have all the physical stuff but until you either fill the void or move on, you can't be a good dating candidate.
If a person is in love with or has strong feelings for someone else, should he/she be dating other people? Is it fair to the other person?
For instance, you care deeply about someone you cannot be with - your ex wife/husband, someone who is married, someone who lives on another continent, someone who is just not interested/available. Should you try to date even though your heart belongs to someone else? Or should you date in order to try to get over the unavailable person? And is it fair to the other person you get involved with if you know you don't care about him/her the way you care about this other person?
My wife tried to date another guy after we broke up and it never worked. I was her only true love and the other guy could not fill my shoes. Every time she expected him to do something the way I would, she was badly disappointed. It made her only love and miss me more. We got back together shortly after and four years later got married.
Well yeah.... I mean what if you love someone who's married or otherwise involved, or is gay, or any other thousands of reasons why you can't be with that person... We can't help who we love sometimes...
What are you supposed to do? Remain celebate?
Nah, I think anyone who believes that there's only one true love out there for everyone hasn't gotten around enough to realize that there are a LOT of truly amazing people out there.... Ya just gotta be willing to try to find them.....
Waiting around, wasting your life, and cheating yourself out of potential happiness is a pointless and miserable exercise I would imagine (Don't know for sure, because it isn't in my nature to do that. ).
If a person is in love with or has strong feelings for someone else, should he/she be dating other people? Is it fair to the other person?
For instance, you care deeply about someone you cannot be with - your ex wife/husband, someone who is married, someone who lives on another continent, someone who is just not interested/available. Should you try to date even though your heart belongs to someone else? Or should you date in order to try to get over the unavailable person? And is it fair to the other person you get involved with if you know you don't care about him/her the way you care about this other person?
Isn't it a bit of a waste of time to hanker after someone who's not available to you? Maybe that sounds puerile but having a fantasy about someone unattainable is a bit of a far cry from being "in love with" that person. Love is something reciprocal.
Seems to me that dating would be the healthy road to take. Doesn't mean jumping into bed and getting madly serious right from the get-go, just simply dating and enjoying someone's company. When did "dating" become so serious?
To answer the OP -yes you can "date" to get your feet wet but you shouldn't get into any major relationships. With that said, love is a mutual feeling---unrequited love is pretty pointless and more often than not just merely infatuation.
Isn't it a bit of a waste of time to hanker after someone who's not available to you? Maybe that sounds puerile but having a fantasy about someone unattainable is a bit of a far cry from being "in love with" that person. Love is something reciprocal.
Seems to me that dating would be the healthy road to take. Doesn't mean jumping into bed and getting madly serious right from the get-go, just simply dating and enjoying someone's company. When did "dating" become so serious?
I always love my wife but her age at the time I thought was a concern. She was 16 and I 23. We became very intimate and intercourse was right around the corner. Statutory rape is a serious crime and my dad being a police officer did not help the matter. Today I know that her parents would have not objected from being intimate with my wife when she was 16, but back then I did not know this. They just would have made certain Cindy and I were responsible. So you see many of us were apart not because of love but other issues
I always love my wife but her age at the time I thought was a concern. She was 16 and I 23. We became very intimate and intercourse was right around the corner. Statutory rape is a serious crime and my dad being a police officer did not help the matter. Today I know that her parents would have not objected from being intimate with my wife when she was 16, but back then I did not know this. They just would have made certain Cindy and I were responsible. So you see many of us were apart not because of love but other issues
I loved your story, but you have to admit that yours was a rather unique situation and not the norm.
I wrote about something similar a few weeks ago which involved a couple MUCH older than you who were separated by circumstances and distance but who eventually rejoined after decades, married and had a wonderful few years together until death did them part. It happens and I'm delighted that in your case everything worked out!
I loved your story, but you have to admit that yours was a rather unique situation and not the norm.
I wrote about something similar a few weeks ago which involved a couple MUCH older than you who were separated by circumstances and distance but who eventually rejoined after decades, married and had a wonderful few years together until death did them part. It happens and I'm delighted that in your case everything worked out!
I thank you greatly for your kind words. I hate to think what my life would have been without her, I do love her so. I wish couples could experience the feeling of true love with out ever feeling sorry.
Isn't it a bit of a waste of time to hanker after someone who's not available to you? Maybe that sounds puerile but having a fantasy about someone unattainable is a bit of a far cry from being "in love with" that person. Love is something reciprocal.
Seems to me that dating would be the healthy road to take. Doesn't mean jumping into bed and getting madly serious right from the get-go, just simply dating and enjoying someone's company. When did "dating" become so serious?
Because dating can lead to something more serious before you're ready? What if you're dating someone and they develop strong feelings for you but you're not ready for that yet because you're still hung up on someone else? I've always viewed dating as a time when you're looking for potential - for something that could develop into something serious down the road. I never saw the point of dating for the sake of dating when it's not going anywhere.
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