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How depressing. I'm one that tries to stay positive regardless, but when the criteria (like a list of 300 things that make or break a second date) is set so high, how could a first date even be fun for a man?
i just go into it not caring and try and have fun regardless of how the date goes. as long as i have a good evening out it doesnt matter too much if i see the girl again or not.
How depressing. I'm one that tries to stay positive regardless, but when the criteria (like a list of 300 things that make or break a second date) is set so high, how could a first date even be fun for a man?
Hi MoNative34,
When there is a list, think list price. Only suckers pay list price. When a woman looks at you, she is not looking at her list. You either turn her on, or you don't. I don't suppose one can wander so far from the list until egregious compatibility issues arise, but its just a list. If you are the kind of guy that wilts at having to spiff up for the list, you are probably putting on a display of unworthy underling as it is.
Within 1.5 seconds of seeing each other, the guy has determined if she is bang-able.
The date goes on for 6 hours so the girl can decide if she even wants to hold his hand.
Hot women call the shots and they can have a list that is 300 items long or 3000 items long. If she is bang-able he will lie act and pretend until he meets all 300 on the list.
I absolutely agree with you. However, that doesn't stop the deafening sound of your biological clock ticking, and the frantic search of a life partner, even though you don't "need" those things to get on in your life.
I think most people, men and women, are hardwired for the "desire" to have a life partner, and while rationally saying that "marriage isn't the be all end all" (which is absolutely true), doesn't change the emotional impact about being married vs. being single in your brain.
If you NEED something you have to be willing to settle in order to get it. If I'm starving, I'm going to end up taking the best thing on the menu, even if it's not what I'd want. We can talk about hardwiring, it's not our fault, etc. but in the end we have to make these adult decisions and are accountable for them. It is hard to even get the conversation started because so few will even consider that single is a reasonable life choice.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,010,901 times
Reputation: 9418
Quote:
Originally Posted by k374
you made the point here... men are not as rigid in their preferences and are more willing to flex it if there are other aspects of a woman that they like, for instance taking your "short man" argument, most men, including myself, *prefer* women with big boobs but most I know will not exclude a woman simply because she has small boobs if she has other attributes that make her a great catch!
Quote:
Originally Posted by k374
and what are you saying short people have negative appearance? Some of the hottest people are short - Tom Cruise, Michael J. Fox, Al Pacino etc.etc. list goes on... so this is highly subjective. There are a large number of men who will tell you that big boobs are a huge plus when it comes to guaging the attractiveness level of a woman.
Age is also another factor, men like younger women, especially ones who are more fertile. Women past 35 need not apply. Any man who dares to express these preferences in the open will be immediately lashed which is a double standard
I've overheard so many men's conversations about women (a past job made it easy to eavesdrop) and the surprising number of men who said they prefer smaller to handful size as opposed to large breasted women always amazed me. Back then (my early 20s) I thought all men wanted larger too. So many thought it made women look overweight. That fits right along with how I felt when I was larger on top. I hated it. Everyone thought I lost all kinds of weight when I went to handful size but only in that area.
Within 1.5 seconds of seeing each other, the guy has determined if she is bang-able.
The date goes on for 6 hours so the girl can decide if she even wants to hold his hand.
Hot women call the shots and they can have a list that is 300 items long or 3000 items long. If she is bang-able he will lie act and pretend until he meets all 300 on the list.
Hi Beena,
But there are lots of "bang-able" women. If you are a sniveling twit, fit yourself up for a collar and put her address on the dog tags, but it won't last anyway because you're a poodle. When a woman makes a given man commit, then she has something. Her commodity market value looses freshness faster as well, and it behooves her to turn that into love. Women have the edge on pump and dump which is usually what they don't want. My commitment was worth a fine booty and a decent woman.
I've overheard so many men's conversations about women (a past job made it easy to eavesdrop) and the surprising number of men who said they prefer smaller to handful size as opposed to large breasted women always amazed me. Back then (my early 20s) I thought all men wanted larger too. So many thought it made women look overweight. That fits right along with how I felt when I was larger on top. I hated it. Everyone thought I lost all kinds of weight when I went to handful size but only in that area.
well, they wouldn't have invented breast implants if that was not something to enhance attractiveness... while there are some men that may prefer small the commonly held view is that large breasts are more appealing to men and that is what is mostly marketed.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,010,901 times
Reputation: 9418
Quote:
Originally Posted by k374
well, they wouldn't have invented breast implants if that was not something to enhance attractiveness... while there are some men that may prefer small the commonly held view is that large breasts are more appealing to men and that is what is mostly marketed.
Most men aren't that superficial. That's not a statistical fact, just an observation.
and what are you saying short people have negative appearance?
No, I am saying it's a much bigger part of their appearance than a single body part.
Quote:
Originally Posted by k374
Some of the hottest people (as defined by the media and general populace) are short - Tom Cruise, Michael J. Fox, Al Pacino etc.etc. list goes on... so this is highly subjective.
So what's your point? I never said no one should date short men, I said *I* am not attracted to short men. Of course it's subjective. But just because I am not attracted to short men doesn't mean I "judge" them as individuals. No one has to date or marry someone they are not attracted to in order to prove some stupid point, like that they aren't "judging" them for their appearance.
Quote:
Originally Posted by k374
There are a large number of men who will tell you that big boobs are a huge plus when it comes to guaging the attractiveness level of a woman.
So what? That's their business. And again, while having small boobs may be a "huge minus", it is nowhere near as serious a turnoff as morbid obesity is for men who like women thin.
Quote:
Originally Posted by k374
Age is also another factor, men like younger women, especially ones who are more fertile. Women past 35 need not apply. Any man who dares to express these preferences in the open will be immediately lashed out at which is a double standard.
What a particular man is attracted to is that man's business. But now you are contradicting yourself. Just a minute ago you were arguing that men are equal opportunity daters who would never turn down a woman on the basis of superficial factors. Now you are claiming that big boobs are "a huge plus" and that "women past 35 need not apply". So which is it? Are you saying men ARE picky, after all? (By the way, does that "fertile" thing also apply to men who don't want to have children? Wow, now we are talking REALLY picky -- irrationally so.)
i just go into it not caring and try and have fun regardless of how the date goes. as long as i have a good evening out it doesnt matter too much if i see the girl again or not.
I agree that it should just be fun. That's why I said what I did. And I like to just have a good time myself, but if I do why not ask her out again? ...but what the author was saying was there are sooo many requirements.
Quote:
Originally Posted by gwynedd1
Hi MoNative34,
When there is a list, think list price. Only suckers pay list price. When a woman looks at you, she is not looking at her list. You either turn her on, or you don't. I don't suppose one can wander so far from the list until egregious compatibility issues arise, but its just a list. If you are the kind of guy that wilts at having to spiff up for the list, you are probably putting on a display of unworthy underling as it is.
Do you mean a man trying too hard to seem perfect? I'm definately not that type of guy. I'm very comfortable with who I am and what I have done with my life for the most part. That in itself gives me confidence, so I see no need to play a "role" as Mr. Right.
Last edited by MoNative34; 02-24-2010 at 03:18 PM..
Reason: sp
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...but what the author was saying was there are sooo many requirements. 
